Mother Knows Best
by flowerchild3286
Summary: Her mom had always said that friends just drag you down, but Kelly was beginning to think she was wrong. She was beginning to think her mom was wrong about a lot of things. Payson/Kelly friendship with a backdrop of Payson/Sasha.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI, and I don't make any money off of this.

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><p>Payson missed Emily. Emily brought a truck load of baggage with her, that was for sure, but at least she wouldn't stab Payson in the back when they roomed together. Kelly might. Literally.<p>

Rooming with Kelly wasn't ideal, but Payson understood why Sasha wanted them together. Of all of the girls on the Worlds team, Payson was the least likely to be manipulated by the devil-horned gymnast. The other Rock girls were easy prey to Kelly's machinations, but Payson had always been harder to rile up. Now, with the new-found confidence that Sasha had instilled in her, Payson was unflappable.

She sighed, sitting down on the bed and plopping an ice pack down on her ankle. There was no use wishing for Emily or regretting her current roommate. There was no changing the way things were and there was no way to bring Emily back. The only thing that Payson _could_ control right now was how well she took care of herself before the finals.

Icing an injury was always a strange mixture of shock and relief. The cold numbed the throbbing in her ankle, but it also sent a shivering jolt through her body. The benefits outweighed the discomfort, though. The sprain wasn't that bad, and if the ice could bring the swelling down she wouldn't need anything but a tight wrap to get through the All Around competition. She had certainly made a name for herself with that last vault in the Team Finals, but it wasn't the kind of name she wanted. She'd rather be remembered for winning, not for being injured.

Kelly came into their room carrying an ice pack of her own. She raised an eyebrow at Payson's position and said, "Hey, look, we're twinkies."

"Twinkies?" asked Payson.

"Yeah," Kelly answered as she propped up her leg, positioned the ice pack over her ankle, and indicated Payson's own elevated leg. "Twinkies. We match. Haven't you ever heard that expression?"

Payson laughed. "No, I haven't, but whatever. We're twinkies. How's yours, by the way?" she asked, jerking her head in the general direction of Kelly's foot.

Kelly shrugged. "The same. It hurts, I'll deal."

"You should talk to Sasha," said Payson, frowning. "He really knows his stuff, he might be able to help. Trust me, you don't want to wait until it's too late."

Kelly was hesitant. "He won't keep me out of the All Around, will he?"

"Is it_ bad_ enough to keep you out?" Payson asked her roommate with an incredulous look. Her only response was another shrug, so Payson dropped the subject. Kelly would talk about it when she was ready and pressing the subject would only put Kelly on the defensive.

"What about you? Are you going to be okay to compete?" Kelly actually sounded concerned, which threw Payson for a loop more than any insult would have. The team finals were over; the two girls were now competitors, and the old Kelly would dance naked in the snow before she showed concern for a competitor.

"Yeah, the trainer says if I rest it tomorrow I should be fine. I'll have to wrap it, but I'll still be able to compete." There was a long, awkward pause before Payson asked what was weighing on her mind. "Were you serious yesterday? About the team stuff, I mean."

Kelly squirmed a little and then reached up to unwind her braided bunches. She didn't look at Payson as she said, "I'm not really sure. I meant it when I said it. I think I mean it now. At least, I don't want to hit you over the head with a pipe wrench anymore—" Payson interrupted her with a snort "—but my mom says thinking about the team will just drag you down during the individual."

"No offense, KP, but your mom is a dumbass." Payson turned toward Kelly to gauge her reaction. Catching a glimpse of Kelly's hair, though, Payson forgot about their conversation and burst out laughing.

"What?" Kelly asked, sounding confused.

It was several minutes before Payson could control herself enough to reply. As it was, she could only manage two words. "Your hair!"

Kelly had finished taking down her hair, and it now stood out several inches from her head in a frizzy mess. The term 'rat's nest' wasn't strong enough to describe the mass of tangles on top of her head.

Kelly pretended to be affronted, but her lips were tugging up at the sides. "Geez, Keeler, I know you're supposed to be perfect and everything, but are you seriously telling me that you've never had bad hair?"

"I'm not telling you anything, Kelly, except that you look ridiculous." Wiping away her tears of mirth, Payson asked the question that had been plaguing her for years. "Why do you wear your hair like that, anyway?"

"It was my 'dumbass' mom's idea," she answered, throwing Payson's earlier words back at her. Then she lifted her chin and said, with a level of dignity that was incongruous with her appearance, "It's a trademark."

"Well, maybe you should go take a shower and get rid of the leftovers of your trademark. If you go out looking like that, someone might faint. They'll mistake you for the bride of Frankenstein. "

Kelly took the advice, although with a fake air of contempt, and moved into the bathroom. Payson was glad to have a few minutes by herself to consider what Kelly had said. She had _sounded_ sincere.

One of the constants of Payson's life, since she first time they were both on the Junior National Team at 12 years old, was that Kelly Parker looked out for Kelly Parker and to hell with everybody else. It was disconcerting for that paradigm to suddenly change, but it would certainly make the next couple of years easier if the change was real. Kelly was, and had always been, Payson's biggest competition. If they worked together instead of against each other, they could both grow to greater heights in the years leading up to the Olympics.

Kelly's ankle was a problem. It had kept her from winning Nationals, and it might very well keep her out of the Olympics if she didn't take care of it soon. Unlike Kelly (or at least the old Kelly), Payson did not want her competition to be taken down by an injury. She suspected that Kelly had been abusing the cortisone shots, which could atrophy the Achilles' tendon and cause worse damage than the initial injury had. Cortisone shots were a temporary fix, not a permanent one, but they were hyped up big in the world of professional sports. Payson had fallen for the hype, and she was pretty sure Kelly had, too.

She toyed with the idea of talking to Sasha about the problem, but it wasn't necessary. Sasha already knew about it, she was sure, and was just giving Kelly time to come to him. He liked for his girls to take responsibility for themselves. If Kelly didn't talk to him tomorrow, he would bring the issue up himself.

Payson's musings were interrupted by Kelly coming out of the bathroom, wrapped in a towel and with hair that was only slightly less tangled than before. She stopped in front of the vanity, armed with a comb and bottle of spray-on conditioner, to battle the monster on top of her head. Conversation would be impossible while Kelly fought her war. Payson leaned over toward her nightstand, reaching for a book to occupy her time, when she saw something that chilled her more than an ice pack ever had.

"Kelly, what happened to your arm?"

Kelly turned around to look at her and then paled as she realized what Payson was talking about. When she lifted the comb to her hair, Kelly had revealed a set of five matching bruises on the inside of her arm. They were fading, mottled and yellow, but they still held the distinct shape of fingers. Someone had grabbed Kelly, and hard. Suddenly, her's past behavior made a lot more sense and seemed a lot more justifiable than it ever had before.

She lowered her arm and tried to laugh it off. "Oh, that's nothing. I took a bad fall from the bars last week, and Jake just barely caught me. I'm lucky he was there, really."

Payson pursed her lips. Coaches sometimes caught gymnasts in weird positions when they fell, but she had never seen anyone caught by their arm. Any experienced coach would go for the waist, and even then it was a bear hug type of grasp. Jake was too good of a coach to grab anyone by the arm if they fell off the bars.

She picked her words carefully. Kelly looked spooked already; cornering her would only make things worse. "You know you can trust me, right? If you ever need anything, _anything_, you can come to me."

Kelly relaxed by a fraction when Payson didn't call her out on the lie, but her guard was still up. "Thanks, Keeler, but I'm fine. Really."

It was another lie. Payson wasn't going to push it and risk alienating Kelly, but she would be talking to Sasha about this. And her mom. Whatever was going on here, it was way above Payson's head. She didn't know how to help Kelly, but her mom and Sasha would. For now, Payson would just concentrate on putting aside their rivalry and being a friend so that when everything went pear shaped, Kelly would have someone to turn to.

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><p>AN: As I'm sure you can tell, this fic will not be all happy and fluffy, but there will be plenty of lighthearted parts along with the serious stuff. This story is very important to me, and here's why:

I am a very maternal person, which led me to being the adoptive mother of many younger girls in my dance and cheer studio who had horrible stage mothers. They turned to me for everything, and I loved them as if they really were my daughters. I did my best to give them self-confidence and self-respect, but there was only so much I could do when their real mothers were constantly telling them that they were not good enough. They are all grown up now, and only one of them has managed to overcome her mother's influence. This story is my way of giving these girls a voice. They deserve to have someone speak for them, and Kelly is going to do it. She is going to fight back.


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI. I do own a DVD copy of Dirty Dancing: Havana Nights, from which I pieced together the name James Jansen.

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><p>As she pulled into her parking spot at the Rock, it occurred to Payson that she should be rushing to see her family or her boyfriend instead of rushing to see Sasha. Well, it was too late now.<p>

She'd been on the road for the past week and a half, hopping from place to place as she made public appearance to discuss her win at Worlds. Much of the time was spent with Kelly, and some of it with Kaylie. In general, though, Kaylie spent her time speaking with news outlets about her recovery while Payson and Kelly made the rounds on all of the big late night talk shows, so they were on very different time schedules. Since Kelly was on the media tour by herself, Kim had played chaperone for her and it had often thrown the two girls together.

The ten days were busy. The media requirements alone would have worn out Payson, but Sasha insisted that they work out every day. He had even called around to make sure they had a place to train in each city. Payson suspected that they had made a few dreams come true for the children and juniors in those gyms; it's not every day that the World Champion, World bronze medalist, and National Champion walk into your gym—unless, of course, you train at the Rock.

Coming back to the Rock after a long absence always felt _right_. It had been nearly a month since they left for Rio, and she hadn't been in Boulder since. She missed the smell of the gym, the sound of hands and feet slapping against the equipment, and more than anything, she missed Sasha. It had been too long since she had seen him.

He looked up as soon as she walked in, as if he had expected her. A smile broke across his face when his eyes caught hers and he disengaged himself from the beginner's class he and Tara were teaching. The moment she saw her coach, Payson's mind shut down and her instincts took over; she ran across the gym to meet him. They met just off the floor and Sasha enveloped her in his arms, spinning her around and burying his face in her hair. It was probably a good thing that the elite girls were gone for the evening.

"God, it's good to see you again," he said, pulling away from their tight embrace but not letting go of her. "It seems like ages since we left Rio."

It did. They had talked on the phone nearly every night, sharing details about their days and chatting about the everyday going ons of the Rock, but Payson felt like she hadn't seen him for months. "I know. How did you survive without me?"

"I barely did," he answered, laughing. "And the gym barely survived without your mum. I think Steve Tanner was planning a hostile takeover."

"Well, I'm glad you foiled his evil plan. We might have ended up with a death ray on top of the gym," Glancing over his shoulder at the group of young teenagers learning round offs, she added, "I think we have an audience."

Sasha dropped his hands from her waist as if he had been burned and Payson slid her hands down from where they rested on his chest. Turning back toward the floor, he said, "Tara, Payson and I need to go over her endorsement offers. Can you take the class for a while?"

As soon as Tara nodded her assent he turned toward his office, leading Payson with a hand resting against the base of her neck. He whispered in her ear when they reached the stairs, "I'm really glad you came. I hate teaching that class."

The timing hadn't been purposeful, but she was glad to give him the excuse he needed. She understood his frustration; he was surprisingly good with the little kids who were learning the basics, but teaching level one skills to girls the same age as Payson was a waste of his expertise. He despised it.

"You know, we probably just started a new batch of rumors," she said as soon as they reached the safety of the office.

He made a derisive noise and began rummaging around on his desk. "Starting new ones would require the old ones to be over."

Payson frowned. "You think it's still that bad? We've been so careful since you got back." They had made sure to maintain a completely professional relationship at the gym so that nobody could accuse Sasha of favoritism or special treatment toward Payson. Their hug tonight was a slip, but it was a rare one.

"I think people are quick to forget everything good and slow to forget everything bad," he said.

She leaned back against his desk with a sigh. "How did this even happen, Sasha?"

She didn't need to elaborate. Her meaning was clear; somehow Sasha had become the most important person in her life without either of them intending for their relationship to change. It began months ago, before her back, before the kiss, before their time in the gym her dad had rented. They had clicked from the very beginning, and each new obstacle had brought them closer until just before World Trials, when their relationship reached a pinnacle. That was a big part of why she was so hurt when he left; she hadn't just lost her coach, she had lost her best friend.

"I don't know," he said, ruffling his hair. "It doesn't even make sense. We're such different people, we've led completely different lives. So why is it that I can't seem to go a single day without talking to you?"

Payson's smile was coquettish as she reached up to smooth out Sasha's collar. "Well, at least I know it's not just me."

Sasha smiled in return and then picked up a stack of papers from his desk. "This is what I was looking for," he said, holding them up triumphantly, "You've made a splash. I don't think you'll have to worry about money anymore."

"What are you talking about?" She grabbed the papers from his hand and flipped though them. "Oh my God, is this for real?"

It was a stack of phone messages, all from companies looking to endorse her. Some were from small companies asking on the off chance that she would actually accept the offer, but some of them were gigantic. Gatorade, Dell, Subway, Lexus, names that she thought she might see after the Olympics, but never before. This was life changing.

Sasha chuckled and leaned his hands against the desk on either side of her. "I think you're going to need an agent. I can't keep fielding all of these calls for you and do my job at the same time."

"You think?" Sarcasm and shock blended together in her voice.

"Do you have anyone in mind?" he asked, grounding her before she became too wrapped up in her thoughts. "Are you going to stick with James?"

"Austin definitely wants me to. He did a great job managing the media for me the past couple of weeks." James Jansen was Austin's agent, and Austin had asked him to handle things for Payson when it became obvious that there was a major media interest in her. He seemed like a decent guy. Right now he was exclusive to Austin and had done a great job for him, looking out for his well being as well as his financial success. When Austin was losing his focus, James was the one to suggest a move to the Rock.

"He would do well by you, I think. He won't push your sponsorship requirements in front of your training like some agents would," said Sasha. Payson was fairly certain that he was alluding to MJ's notorious thirst for publicity.

Payson was too shocked to think about signing contracts just yet, so she changed the subject. "What's that?" she asked, nodding toward a similar pile of papers still sitting on Sasha's desk. "Offer's for Kaylie?"

Sasha grimaced. "No, they're for Kelly. Normally I would pass them on to her agent, but with the way things are right now…"

He didn't need to elaborate. Kelly's agent was her mom. Payson had told Kim and Sasha about the marks she saw on Kelly's arm, and they all suspected that Sheila had left them there. The adults were handling the situation, but Payson felt guilty for getting so caught up in Sasha and sponsorships that she forgot about Kelly.

"How's that going, anyway?" she asked.

He ran his hands through his hair again and sank down into his office chair. "Not well. We don't have any solid proof that Sheila is abusing her, and I can't just call CPS like I normally would. She has enough money and enough power to worm her way out of the charges. It would just make things worse for Kelly in the long run."

Payson's frustration was evident on her face. "So Kelly's being hurt and there's nothing we can do about it?"

"Yet, Payson. There's nothing we can do _yet_, but we'll figure something out. I'm not going to let Kelly keep getting hurt." His face was pinched and his voice was strained. It suddenly occurred to Payson that Sasha had been avoiding the subject when they talked on the phone, which he only did when he was trying to protect her from something. He was a lot more worried than he was letting on.

"You should go home, Payson," he said after a long moment of silence between them, taking her hand to remove the sting from his words. "You've been gone for a long time. Go be with your family."

Payson ran her fingers though his hair, fixing the mess he made of it earlier, and whispered, "You're my family, too." Then she squeezed his hand and left, stopping at the office door to say, "Don't punish yourself, Sasha. You're doing everything you can for her."

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><p>The Keeler house was chaotic for a long time after Payson's arrival home. Becca screamed and tackled her the moment she walked through the door, then they had a very raucous family dinner, and Kim nearly fainted when she looked at the stack of endorsement offers that Payson brought home. The evening was fun and crazy, and it took her mind off of the melancholy end to her visit with Sasha, but Payson was glad when she finally got a little peace and quiet.<p>

Her parents were in the kitchen having an intense discussion about Payson's financial future, and Payson was happily avoiding the conversation. She was content in the knowledge that she would never need to worry about money again and felt no need to continue talking about it. She'd speak with James in the morning and let him work out the details. For now, it was much more pleasant to curl up on the couch with Becca and watch old Shirley Temple movies.

She was surprised when the doorbell rang halfway through _Rebecca of Sunnybrook Farm_. It was well into the evening; Payson would have already been asleep if the night hadn't been a special occasion. It couldn't be Kaylie or Lauren—they were already in bed—and Heather or any of her parent's friends would have called before showing up so late.

"I've got it, mom," she yelled as she untangled herself from her shared blanket and rose from the couch. Coming to a halt in the front hallway, Payson swung open the front door and then froze in shock.

Kelly Parker was standing on the porch with tears streaming from her eyes, looking like she'd just been in a fist fight. A ghastly bruise was blooming on the side of her face and there was a small cut near her eyebrow. She opened her mouth to speak, but a small sob escaped her lips before she managed to choke out, "I didn't know where else to go."

Without hesitation, Payson reached out to Kelly and pulled her into a tight hug. Kelly collapsed against her, holding onto Payson for support as gasping sobs wracked her body. Payson didn't know how to comfort her friend, so she said the only thing that came to mind. "You can always come here, Kelly. Always."

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><p>AN: There was a lot more that was supposed to be in this chapter, but as my Cat and Mouse readers know, words tend to run away with me. There'll be no 14,000 word chapters in this story; we'll cover the fallout next chapter with a reasonable word count.

Thanks to all the lovely people who favorited this story and/or put it on alert. It always makes me happy to get those notifications. But you know what would make me even _more_ happy? If you reviewed. Just sayin' :)


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI. I wish I did, but I don't.

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><p>"What happened, Kelly?" Kim asked. Kim, Kelly, and Payson were sitting on the couch together while Kim cleaned and bandaged the cut on Kelly's forehead. Payson was rubbing soothing circles on Kelly's back; she had calmed down considerably since her unexpected arrival, but she was obviously teetering on the edge of a break down.<p>

"She… she's never hit me before. Not until…." Her speech was hesitant and halting, her gaze directed at the floor. Payson couldn't tell if it was because she was reluctant to implicate her mother or because she was ashamed, or possibly a combination of both.

"Kelly," said Kim, concern and compassion evident in her voice. "You can trust us. Anything you say stays here unless you tell us otherwise."

Kelly hesitated for a moment longer, but when she looked up into Kim's eyes her shoulders straightened and her eyes hardened with steely resolve. "When I got home tonight she was waiting for me. I knew she was mad about me losing at Worlds but I thought, you know, it's been two weeks. She's had time to calm down."

The Keelers stayed quiet, allowing Kelly the time she needed before she could continue. "I think she'd been drinking. She kept yelling at me, about how I had let her down, how I had forgotten how much I owed her. She said I was weak because I had let you guys get to me. She said that you had played me…"

"Then what happened?" urged Kim gently.

"I got angry. I yelled back. I said she was wrong, that… that maybe she was the one playing me. She got so mad…" She looked up at them with shame written across her face. "I don't know what made me say it. I was just so _angry_ with her. I just wanted her to be my mom for once instead of my manager."

Kim cupped her hand against Kelly's cheek, on the side that wasn't swollen and bruised. "No matter what you said, Kelly, it does not give her the right to hit you. Payson's been mad at me plenty of times before. Everybody gets mad at their mom sometimes."

Tears threatened to fall again as she asked, "What am I going to do?"

"You'll stay here," Kim answered without hesitation. Payson had never seen her mother turn away someone in need of help, and they had both grown very attached to Kelly over the past few weeks, so the offer was no surprise. "We'll file a restraining order against your mom so she can't hurt you again and Mark and I will petition to become your legal guardians. We're going to protect you, Kelly."

Kelly panicked. "No! No, we can't file charges. She'll ruin me, she'll make it seem like I made it all up to get attention. She has connections with every major tabloid in the US; she can spin this however she wants. My sponsors will all drop me and the NGO won't put me on any of the teams because of the bad publicity. Gymnastics is the only thing I have left, I can't lose it!"

Kim winced, clearly not comfortable with the situation or the options. "Kelly, we have to do something. You can't stay with her."

"We'll call Steve Tanner." Kelly and Kim both turned to Payson in shock. Payson had been pondering the situation since Kelly showed up at the front door, and everything came back to one solution: Steve Tanner. She knew it was an outrageous idea, but it would work.

"Why, so he can start rumors that I got beat up in an underground fight club?" Surprise had rendered Kelly sarcastic, momentarily pushing aside her distress. "Payson, how could calling him possibly be helpful?"

Payson expected opposition, so she had her arguments prepared. "He may be a complete slimeball, but he's a fantastic lawyer. The best in Boulder, one of the best in Colorado. He can make Sheila turn over custody. And he knows how to do things behind the curtain, so there wouldn't be any publicity associated with it. Steve Tanner is the only one who can pull this off."

"Okay, even supposing he could do it," Kelly said, her voice more subdued as her sarcastic façade faded away. Her dejection was seeping back in. "Even supposing he _could_ make my mom agree to let me go, why would he help me? I'm Lauren's competition."

Kim, beginning to understand, answered the question. "If there is anything in this world that Steve Tanner holds sacred, it's the relationship between parents and their children. He'll fight for you, and he'll fight hard."

Taking Kelly's hand, Payson assured her, "He can do it. She won't be able to hurt you anymore."

"Are you sure that this will work, Payson?" The look that Kelly gave her was heartbreaking. It was full of devastation, resignation, and hope. So much was riding on this plan. It wasn't just Kelly's career that was on the line; it was her life.

"It will work," said Payson. God, she hoped she was right.

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><p>It took an hour for Steve to get to the Keeler house after they called him, and Payson and Kelly had spent the time watching old episodes of The Flintstones on the Cartoon Network. The best thing about cartoons is their ability to pull the watcher away from the harsh realities of life, and Kelly definitely needed to be pulled away for a few minutes. She had even managed to laugh a couple of times.<p>

The girls ignored the quite murmurs of Steve's conversations with Kim and Mark, trying to stay within their safe cartoon-cocoon for a few minutes longer. They both knew that things were about to get hard again. Payson reached down to link her fingers with Kelly's, giving her hand a supportive squeeze.

When he came into the living room, all of Steve Tanner's fast-paced, authoritative manner was gone; he approached them cautiously, as if he might startle Kelly away like a frightened deer. Crouching down in front of Kelly, he asked her permission before turning off the television. Payson hadn't seen him so sincerely concerned since Lauren ran out of her thirteenth birthday party in tears. Years later Payson found out that Leslie had checked herself out of yet another rehab facility that same day, and Lauren didn't hear from her again until earlier this year.

"Kelly," Steve said, taking the hand that Payson wasn't holding. "I know this is hard for you, but I need to ask you some questions. I'm going to draw up some papers for your mom to sign, but there are a few things I need to know to make that happen."

Kelly's voice quavered a little, and she clutched Payson hand with an almost painful grip, but she agreed. "If it means I can stay here, I'll give you all the answers you need."

"Okay. I'll try to keep this as short as possible for you." Steve gave Kelly an encouraging smile, paused, and then asked his first and hardest question. "Before tonight, has your mom ever harmed you physically?"

Kelly looked to Payson for support before answering, "She…She's grabbed me a few times. Once she twisted my arm to make me drop something."

"She left bruises on Kelly's arm before Worlds." Payson added. She didn't know much about the law, but she did know that witnesses were important. "I saw them. Five marks, like she had squeezed really hard."

Kelly nodded. "Yeah, she had, um, had led me out of the party at your house, Mr. Tanner. I didn't want to leave, so she held onto me as she walked out."

A flush of anger colored Steve's face, but his voice stayed calm. "Did she ever force you to do something that you didn't want to do?"

Kelly drew back from him by a few inches and her body became rigid. It was subtle, but he had obviously struck a nerve. "No. She's never forced me to do anything."

"Kelly," he said, "You have to be honest with me. If I'm going to help you I need to know the truth."

Payson untangled their fingers and wrapped her arm around Kelly's shoulders instead. "You can trust him, Kelly. You can trust _me_."

Her eyes welled with tears, but her defensive posture relaxed a little. "She didn't force me to do anything. She just, I don't know, made me feel guilty. She made me feel like I was hurting her or being stupid if I _didn't_ do what she wanted."

That _bitch_. The violence could at least be attributed to anger and passion, but this kind of manipulation spoke of cold-hearted exploitation. She wasn't reacting, she was plotting. Payson wanted to drive straight to Denver and slap Sheila Baboyan across the face. And then kick her in the shin. And then run her over with a car. People like Sheila shouldn't be allowed to have children. Kim was a strict mother and expected her daughters to follow her rules, but she would never stoop to making Payson feel guilty about her choices. Payson had never appreciated her mom as much as she did in that moment.

"Okay, this is the last of the hard questions, and then we'll move on to something a little less personal," promised Steve. "If you had to, would you testify against your mom in court?"

"I thought I wouldn't have to go to court," Kelly cried, her voice rising to a higher pitch. "Payson said that you could do this without publicity."

Steve sighed and looked down to where his hands were joined with one of Kelly's. There was an air of resignation about him, but when he looked back up his eyes were full of determined fire. "I'm going to do my best to keep this out of the courts, Kelly, and I truly believe that I can do it. But this can't be a bluff. When I tell your mother that we will press charges if she doesn't sign our contract, I have to be telling the truth. If she senses that we won't take this all the way she'll never sign."

Kelly looked back and forth between Steve and Payson. "You're sure this will work?"

Neither hesitated as they answered together, "Yes."

"Then I'll do it. If I have to, I'll testify against her." Kelly looked terrified at the idea, but Payson could tell that she was being truthful. Taking the case to court was Kelly's greatest fear, but if there was no other choice she would do it. She would stand up for herself.

"Okay," Steve nodded, "The rest is easy. I need to know about your finances."

He spent nearly two hours delving into the details of Kelly's money management. It was boring and monotonous, but oddly comforting. Money was concrete. It was innocuous. People may do horrible things for money, but _it_ never slapped a child across the face. Talking about money was much easier than talking about the ways that Sheila Baboyan had hurt her daughter.

Before he left, Steve took pictures of Kelly's face from several different angles. It was a humiliating experience for Kelly, but Steve assured them that it was necessary. They made plans for the next morning and then he left, for what Payson assumed was an all night work session. Kelly and Payson had nothing else to do except worry, but Steve Tanner had only a few hours to draw up legal documents that would normally take days.

Only one thing was certain: the next day would be difficult for all of them.

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><p>It was after two in the morning when Payson slid out from under her sheets. She was careful not to disturb Kelly, who was asleep beside her in the bed. Kelly had a rough day and needed her sleep, so Payson didn't want to wake her accidentally. At least that's what she told herself; if she looked too closely at her motives, Payson might be forced to admit that she was being so quiet because she didn't want Kelly to know what she was doing.<p>

She sneaked down the hallway, edging by the doors of her parents' and Becca's rooms. She'd traveled this route in the dark before; not often, but enough to know which boards creaked on the way to the living room. She didn't let herself relax until she was safely curled up on the couch. Unclenching the hand curled around her cell phone, Payson unlocked it and dialed a familiar number.

The phone rang for longer than was typical, indicating that its owner was asleep. Finally, a panicked voice came through the line. "Payson? What's wrong?"

She should have known he would be worried. The last time she called him so late had been when she found out how far her parents were in debt. "I'm fine, Sasha. Nothing is wrong."

"If everything is fine, then why are you calling me in the middle of the night?" he asked. Doubt rang clear in his voice.

"It's been a long day. I just… wanted to hear your voice." She wasn't lying, but she wasn't exactly telling him the truth, either. She didn't know why she was hedging around the issue; she had called him because she wanted to talk about Kelly, but now that he was on the line she was having a hard time being upfront.

"Pay," he said, soft and low, "What's going on?"

"Kelly's moving in with us." Well, that was a roundabout way to tell him what was bothering her. Why couldn't she just be honest with him? She hadn't hidden anything from Sasha in months.

He understood anyway. "Oh God, what did her mum do? Is she okay?"

Payson laughed, even though there was nothing funny about the situation. She was growing far too cynical. "Physically? She's fine, just a nasty bruise on her face. Mentally? I doubt she'll ever be okay again."

There was a long pause before Sasha's voice drifted though the phone again. "Are _you_ okay?"

"Not really." She finally cracked. The torrent of anger and frustration she had been holding back all day burst forth in one heaving sob. "Oh god, Sasha, she was _horrible_ to her. How could she do it? How could anyone do something like that to their own child?"

She could hear him sigh, could imagine him running his hand through his hair like he always did when he was frustrated. "I don't know, Payson. I don't think I want to. I don't want to go anywhere near the mind of someone as screwed up as Sheila Baboyan."

"I don't know how to help Kelly," Payson said, sniffling against her tears. "I want to help, but nothing I could possibly say can make this go away for her. I feel so useless."

"You're already helping, just by being there for her. What she needs right now is someone she can trust, someone like you."

Payson made an effort to get her emotions under control and wiped away the tears streaming down her face. "Thanks," she said, more subdued now that her anger had burned out. "I'm sorry I woke you up."

"Don't be. Anytime you need me, I'm here." They'd had this conversation before. Every time Payson called him in the middle of the night she apologized, and every time he told her there was no need. Deep down, Payson knew that Sasha would always be there for her; that's why she kept calling him.

"I know," she said, sniffling. After a long pause she added, "We never talked about it, but I guess Kelly will have to move to the Rock. She can't train in Denver as long as her mom is there."

"Did you think I would turn her away?" he asked, making Payson smile a little at the absurdity.

"No. I'm just thinking out loud, I guess," she answered, sounding drowsy. Talking to Sasha was luring her into sense of safety and comfort; every word he uttered soothed her. Whenever she was upset, he was the only one who could calm her down.

"You sound tired, Pay. Go back to bed."

"Okay…" she said, already beginning to drift off to sleep. "I'm going to Denver with Kelly tomorrow, but I'll call you as soon as I can."

After they hung up, Payson dragged herself back to bed without bothering to be quite. Talking with Sasha had drained her of tension, leaving her barely awake enough to stumble down the hallway. As soon as her head hit the pillow, Payson was asleep. The last thing she saw was Kelly lying beside her, for once looking peaceful.

* * *

><p>AN: Sorry for the long delay, but you know… Christmas. It kind of kept me busy for a while :)

I was going to watch the campfire scene in Where's Kaylie to make sure the stuff I said about Lauren stayed within canon, which naturally led to watching the entire episode, which led to a MIOBI marathon. I've worked my way up to Like Mother, Like Supermodel so far. I'm about to go watch the next episode.

Reviews are very inspirational. And they make me happy.


	4. Chapter 4

Discaimer: I don't own MIOBI, and in real life Mr. Allers is the director of the Lion King, which I was watching while I wrote this.

* * *

><p>Kelly Parker's house was huge. It was at least as big as the Cruz home, but with less refinement of taste. Ronnie's decorative style was shallow and fake, but at least it looked nice. Sheila's decorations were downright gaudy. There was a giant fountain in the middle of the circle drive with a greek-god type statue of a naked man, and shrubs shaped like chessmen lined the yard. How could anyone possibly think this looked good?<p>

"Wow, Kelly. Your mom has great taste," Payson said, looking out the window of Kelly's BMW Roadster. "Do you think she'd come decorate my house if I asked?"

Kelly glared at her from the driver's seat. "Ha, ha. You can joke all you want, but I've had to live with this for years. Do you have any idea how embarrassing this stuff is?"

"Yeah, I think I do," she answered, sweeping her gaze across the tacky yard one more time. Then, unbuckling her seatbelt, Payson opened the passenger door and stepped out. "Come on, we should get this over with. Putting it off isn't going to make it suck any less."

"Yeah, I know," Kelly said with a heavy sigh. Together they walked to join Steve Tanner by his Hummer.

"If it makes you feel any better," Payson whispered in Kelly's ear, "That Hummer is pretty damn gaudy, too."

Kelly giggled. "I know this is horrible, but that actually does make me feel better."

"Okay, girls," Steve said, pulling his briefcase from behind his seat, "We're doing this just like we discussed last night. You two go upstairs and pack some of Kelly's stuff, just what you need to get through the next week or so. We'll have movers come get the rest later. Don't talk to your mother, no matter what she says to you, and leave as soon as you're done. I'll probably be here for a few hours."

Kelly rolled her eyes. "Is that your lawyer way of saying 'Go play with your friends and let the grownups talk'?"

"Well, it's good to know you've kept your sense of humor," Steve said, smiling down at her. Personally, Payson thought that Kelly had kept a protective sense of sarcasm, but if Steve wanted to make a merit out of it, she wasn't going to contradict him.

Kelly's hands shook a little as she unlocked the front door, but otherwise she showed no sign of nerves. She was a good faker. Almost as soon as they entered the house, though, Sheila Baboyan's voice could be heard floating down the hallway. Well, floating wasn't the right word; it was more like barreling. She was louder and shriller than any human had a right to be.

"Where the hell have you been, you ungrateful little wretch! You have responsibilities in this house, responsibilities to me. I had to cancel your interview with Channel 9 News this morning, do you have any idea how hard that was to explain?" The screaming came to an abrupt halt when Sheila entered the foyer and saw the unexpected trio by the door.

Steve nudged them toward the stairs, and Payson wrapped her arm around Kelly's shoulder as they walked away from Sheila. Behind them, Steve could be heard saying, "I think the bruise on Kelly's face would be harder to explain than a cancellation."

Kelly led them up a set of stairs and down a long hallway. They passed several rooms full of ornate furniture, heavily embroidered drapes, and ugly antiques, making Payson certain that whoever decorated the house should be institutionalized. When they reached Kelly's bedroom, Payson actually breathed a sigh of relief to be in a normal environment again.

Kelly's room was tasteful and down to earth, which didn't surprise Payson. What did surprise her were the bookshelves. Square shelves climbed the walls like a pyramid, meeting in the corner near the ceiling. There were the expected rows of trophies and medals hanging from hooks and corners, but then there were also scores of books. There was a little bit of everything; Harry Potter, Jane Austen, Shakespeare, Plato. Modern, classic, biographies, philosophy, theology. This didn't fit with Payson's conception of Kelly at all.

"So I take it you like to read?"

Kelly blew off the question with a shrug of her shoulders. "My dad used to read to me when I was little. It stuck."

Payson swept her eyes across the shelves again and said, "You know, I was worried about where we would put all of your trophies, but where are we going to put all of your _books_?"

For a couple of minutes she was too busy examining the contents of the room to notice that Kelly had stopped dead. When she finally became aware of the silence, Payson turned around to find Kelly staring at her. "What, do I have something on my face?"

"Where are we going to put all of my trophies? And my books? You mean you're actually planning on bringing all this stuff to your house?" Her voice was shrill with shock and emotion, and her eyes were watery. She had never looked so vulnerable.

Payson made sure to capture Kelly's gaze and hold it as she said, "Kelly, it's your house too now. Your stuff belongs there just as much as mine does."

There was a quick dance of emotions across Kelly's face as she obviously fought to control herself. Finally, she shook her hair back from her face and said, "Well, it's going to take some creative genius to get all of our trophies in one room together. We might need to knock down a wall or something."

Payson let the bluff and bravado act slide, knowing how difficult the whole situation was for her. They needed to get Kelly's things and go before the shit really hit the fan. There was no telling just what Steve Tanner was saying to Sheila, and the girls shouldn't be around if things went badly.

Kelly's mind was bent in the same direction, because she said, "We can probably just take the suitcases from the trip. I didn't…I didn't really have time to unpack last night. The maid probably put them in the closet until I could get to them."

Payson poked around in Kelly's stuff while she went to the closet to get her bags. "If you have a maid, why didn't she just unpack them for you?"

"It creeps me out for strangers to go through my things, and we have a new maid almost every month. Mom's never been great at keeping employees." Kelly's voice had a slight echo as she called from her closet, which said a lot about how big it must be. When she came out, she was pulling two suitcases and her gym bag was slung over her shoulder. "I think we can just take these and go. We should probably get out before either my mom or Mr. Tanner commit murder."

"Yeah, you're right," agreed Payson. "Is there anything else you want to take now? Other than your clothes and gym stuff, I mean."

Kelly looked around her and started picking up a few things and adding them to her gym bag. She took a framed picture of what appeared to be a young Kelly and her dad, a stuffed tiger, and an extremely worn out copy of _The Scarlet Pimpernel_. Then she squared her shoulders and said, "Okay, let's go."

* * *

><p>When he heard Sheila Baboyan screaming abuse at Kelly, Steve lost his temper. His voice was deadly calm, but his eyes were on fire with anger. "I think the bruise on Kelly's face would be harder to explain than a cancellation."<p>

Sheila watched the girls climb the stairs with suspicion, and then turned to glare at Steve. "I'll thank you not to interfere, Mr. Tanner. What happens between me and _my_ daughter is none of your business."

"Actually, Miss Baboyan, it is my business. I am representing Kelly in her case against you. We have quite a bit to discuss, so why don't we take this somewhere more private?" A couple of servants were peeking their heads around door, which Steve knew would be enough motivation to get Sheila out of the foyer and give the girls a clear way out of the house.

She was incensed, but she was too aware of the eavesdroppers to argue, so she stormed away to an office at the back of the house. As soon as the door was closed she turned on him. "You're _representing_ Kelly? I don't know what scheme you've talked her into, but I can assure you it won't work. My lawyers will see to that."

It took all of Steve will power not to lay into the sociopath standing in front of him. She was all self-righteous indignation, managing to completely ignore the fact that she had abused her own child. It had been years since Steve had been this pissed off at anyone. "You may very well be right, Miss Baboyan. We can take this to the courts and have a long drawn out legal battle which you may win. I doubt it, because I am very good at my job, but it is a possibility. But tell me this; how well do you think your reputation will recover after you have publicly been accused of child abuse? Do you think any of your clients will be comfortable retaining you as their agent after we have brought forward evidence that you embezzled from Kelly Parker Enterprise? It doesn't matter if you win the case, Miss Baboyan. The damage will already be done."

Swiping the phone from her desk she said, "I'm calling my lawyer right now. You will not get away with this!"

Casually, he settled into a chair near her monstrosity of a desk. Looking closely, he could see cherubs carved into the legs. "If you wouldn't mind, get somebody out here right away. I don't want to lose any time getting this settled."

For the next few minutes she spoke into her phone with furious whispers. Steve picked up an ugly knick-knack from her desk and examined it with feigned curiosity. The act of indifference would shake Sheila's confidence and put her off guard; if he was aggressive, she would be as well, but people never knew how to respond to an indolent lawyer. When she hung up the phone, he began drawing papers out of his briefcase with cool confidence.

"I have here a contract, that you _will_ sign, which details your future dealings with Kelly." He began flipping through pages and flashing them in front of Sheila's face, but never long enough for her to read them. "As an overview: You will forfeit all custodial rights and legal guardianship will be granted to Kim and Mark Keeler." New page. "You will be removed as the trustee of Kelly's assets and replaced by Kim and Mark Keeler." New page. "As a temporary measure, I will manage all matters concerning Kelly's public persona, including endorsements, sponsorships, and appearances. You will surrender all documents pertaining to these concerns." New page. "You will resign as President and CEO of Kelly Parked Enterprise. I will assume control of the company until a permanent replacement can be found." He flipped the document closed. "Any attempt to slander Kelly's image or subvert her success will be considered a breach of contract and further legal action will be taken against you. Do you have any questions?"

"Just one," she sneered, "Why in god's name would I ever sign a contract like that? This isn't how negotiation works, Mr. Tanner. If you want something from me, you have to give me something in return."

"Oh, but we are, Miss Baboyan," Steve said, relaxing back into his chair. "The first of which is no jail time. Child abuse is a Class 1 misdemeanor; that's a minimum of 6 months, a maximum of 18. And embezzlement, well, that's 3 years. By the by, you are a _really_ bad embezzler. Did you even try to hide it? I found the discrepancies in a matter of hours by looking through the company's public records; it must be incredibly obvious in your private books."

"I don't know what you're talking about," Sheila bristled. "I would never steal from my precious angel. You are making that up."

"Oh, I wish I was." He pulled out several more papers and began laying them out across her desk. "Here are your last four quarterly reports filed with the SEC. The discrepancies have been clearly marked. If needed, we can subpoena your full financial records and have a forensic accountant examine them. And while we're looking at evidence against you, why don't you take a gander at these pictures."

He had printed copies of the pictures from the night before, and had managed to dig up some photographs of Kelly in Rio where the marks on her arm were visible. The deathblow was a still depicting Sheila dragging Kelly out of the pre-Worlds party. Pointing to the last picture, he said, "This one is a still from a video in which you are forcing Kelly to leave my house. Believe me, it wasn't easy to find; I had to scour every second of the various footage from the party, but that video, coupled with these pictures and Kelly's testimony, should ensure a guilty verdict."

"Kelly would never testify against me," she insisted, but there was doubt in her voice. Her confidence was shaken by the evidence presented against her.

"She will." There was a timbre in his voice which conveyed the certainty of his statement. As he had told Kelly last night, this could not be a bluff.

About this time, voices could be heard in the hallway. The door opened and a tall man in an Armani suit stepped into the office. Steve had met him before; he was one of the best lawyers in Denver, but Steve was better. Things were going exactly as planned.

"Mr. Allers, I'm so glad you could make it," he said, standing to shake the man's hand. "I've brought some papers for Miss Baboyan to sign, and I would like for you to take a look at them."

Sheila immediately began to rant about the disrespectful way in which Steve had treated her and enjoined Mr. Allers to settle the matter immediately. To his credit, he completely ignored her other than to say, "If you will please be quite, Sheila, I'll take a look at the papers and see what I can do."

He read through the contract in silence, his countenance growing paler and more grave with each new page. When he finished, he examined each piece of evidence that Steve had laid out on Sheila's desk. Finally, looking up at his client, he said, "I would advise you to sign the contract, Sheila."

For a long moment she sat frozen, unable to respond. When she did speak she could only manage a strangled, "What?"

Mr. Allers, faced with the obvious guilt of his client, maintained his calm admirably. "They are being incredibly generous. They're allowing you to keep the house, your car, everything that you have bought with Kelly's earnings. They aren't seeking recompense for the money you stole from KPE"—his disapproval of her actions rang clear in his voice—"or pressing any charges. This is a better settlement than you could ever hope to get from a judge."

"Are you saying," Sheila began, standing up from her chair and leaning against her desk with a menacing posture, "That you are not capable of performing your duties and protecting my best interest?"

"What I am saying, Sheila, is that signing Mr. Tanner's contract _is_ in your best interest. We cannot take this to court." Standing, he picked up one of the pictures of Kelly's bruised face and held it up in front of her face. "Look at this! Juries hate child abusers; they will be prejudiced against you from the start. This one picture will ensure a guilty verdict on every charge. _Sign the damn contract_."

It took another hour for the meeting to conclude, the majority of which Mr. Allers spent convincing Sheila to sign the papers. When she finally did, Steve and Mr. Allers made plans to finalize the agreement. They had to get signatures from the Keelers, meet with a judge, file the paperwork for Kelly's guardianship, and execute the transfer of all of Kelly's business matters into Steve's control. Even expediting everything, the whole process would take at least a week and Steve had the extra responsibility of finding someone to represent Kelly and run KPE.

As the two men were leaving the office, Steve paused at the door and turned back. "I don't pretend to be a good man, Miss Baboyan, so I know that I'm in no position to judge others, but you disgust me. Children are the most precious thing on this earth; it takes a special kind of perversion to want to harm them. Kelly is a very special, very talented little girl, and you don't deserve her."

* * *

><p>Kelly brought up the subject before Payson had a chance. They were pulling out of the Parkers' driveway when she asked, "I can't train at Denver Elite anymore, can I?"<p>

Payson stared in the side mirror, watching the house fade into the distance. "No, it's too much of a risk. You can't be that close to your mom every day. You'll like it at the Rock, though. It's a good environment."

"I guess I should head to the gym now, tell Marty I'm leaving," she said, flicking on her turning signal.

"Sasha probably called him already, but we still need to go. We need to clean out your locker, and you should talk to Marty in person."

"Wait," said Kelly, turning toward the passenger seat to look at Payson, "How does Sasha even know? I haven't talked to him yet."

"Keep your eyes on the road," she said, trying to buy herself a few extra seconds to come up with a response. She was normally very careful about mentioning Sasha, especially anything that might imply that their relationship was more that it seemed to the public, but she hadn't been thinking clearly. Well, if Kelly was going to live with her, she was going to notice something, so there was no point in lying. "I called him last night after you went to sleep."

"It was, like, after midnight when we went to bed. You called your coach in the middle of the night?" Kelly sounded doubtful, like Payson might be making it up.

"Yeeeah," said Payson, dragging out the word for several seconds. "Listen, if you're going to live with me, you're going to figure this out eventually—"

"Oh my God, the rumors are true!"

"No! Geez, Kelly, how stupid do you think I am? Having an affair with Sasha would pretty much ruin both our careers." That kiss had been a stupid, impulsive move that had nearly destroyed both their lives.

Kelly gave Payson an incredulous look. "You know," she said, "most people don't need a reason not to have an affair with their coach, it's just a given. What I'm getting out of this is that if it _wouldn't_ ruin your careers, you would be having an affair."

"It's not like that. We're just really close. Maybe closer than we should be, but there is nothing romantic about our relationship. He's my best friend." She hoped she sounded as convincing as she wanted to. She was trying to convince herself as well; she understood now that what she felt for him was affection for a friend and coach, but that didn't stop the physical attraction. She couldn't seem to control her body's reaction to his presence.

They were at the gym now, so Kelly pulled into a parking spot before turning to face Payson. "You're keeping me from being homeless, so I'm not really in a position to criticize, but I hope you realize that this isn't normal. It's not normal to be best friends with someone who is twice your age, and it's not normal for you to call him in the middle of the night. Honestly, it's not normal for you to be calling him at all. The only time I've ever called Marty was to tell him that I got a flat and would be late to practice. You're playing a really dangerous game."

"This isn't a game, Kelly, it's my life. It's _his_ life," she said, trying to make Kelly understand. "We didn't plan for this to happen, but it did, and I'm asking you as a friend not to tell anybody. You're right, it's not normal, and people won't understand. That's why we keep it secret."

Kelly shrugged her shoulders and rolled her eyes. "Ok, fine. Like I said, I'm in no position to criticize. I'll keep your secret, but it still creeps me out."

"Thanks," she said, reaching over to squeeze Kelly's hand. "Now come on, let's go talk to Marty."

Suddenly Kelly froze. There was a look of terror in her eyes and her hand clench against Payson's. "I can't go in there. I didn't think this through; I can't go in looking like this. Everybody will see."

Payson understood her reluctance. After she broke her back, a big part of why she didn't want to go to the gym was because she didn't want the other gymnasts to see her in the back brace. She and Kelly both prided themselves on being strong, and anything that showed weakness was unacceptable. What happened to Kelly didn't make her weak, but she would feel like it did.

"Okay," she said, disentangling her hand from Kelly's deathgrip, "I'll go get your stuff out of your locker and send Marty out here. Is that better?"

When Kelly agreed and gave her the locker combination, Payson left the car and made her way into the Denver Elite. She couldn't help but remember the last time she had walked through those doors, a mixture of pissed off and vulnerable, unable to carry on without Marty's guidance. She had grown so much since then. When Sasha left she was hurt and angry, but she stayed strong enough to lead the gym. It was only at night when she let her guard down and allowed herself to miss him.

Everyone stopped to look at her when she walked into the gym, just like they did the last time. Maybe they expected her to yell again. Marty followed the direction of his gymnasts' gaze and met her eyes, silently indicating that she should go to his office. When she got there, she stood waiting for Marty in silence.

"Sasha told me what happened," he said, stepping through the door and closing it behind him.

"I figured he would."

"Is Kelly okay?" he asked, slumping into his chair. He looked sad and… old. He had aged a decade in the six months since he left the Rock.

Payson heaved a frustrated sign and ran her fingers through her hair, a bad habit she had picked up from Sasha. "She's doing as well as can be expected. She didn't want to come in; she…she didn't want people to see."

"Damn it all," he said, running his hand across his face. It was something he always did when he was stressed. "I could kill that woman for what she did... What?"

Payson didn't realize that her feelings were showing so clearly on her face, but Marty had noticed something. She didn't want to share her thoughts, but she had trained with him long enough to know that he wouldn't let it drop. "Okay, I'm not saying that this is anywhere near as bad as what Sheila did, but... you did pretty much destroy Kaylie's family. There are more than a few people who want to kill you, too."

"Wow, you don't pull any punches, do you? What the hell is Sasha teaching you up there in Boulder?"

Payson raised one eyebrow in response. "Confidence."

Marty actually smiled, despite the slap in the face she had just given him. "Apparently. But I'd like to think I had a little something to do with that, too."

"Yeah, you did, by leaving and giving us a chance to get Sasha." She winced as soon as the words left her mouth. She shouldn't be saying these things, and on any normal day she wouldn't, but her emotions were running high. She was having a hard time keeping he words in check. "I'm sorry, Marty. I didn't mean that."

"Yeah, you did," he said, running his hand across his face again. The action was starting to get on Payson's nerves; she was way too on edge if something so small was getting to her. "I know I screwed up, Payson. I deserve everything you're throwing at me."

"No you don't," she said, shaking her head, "I'm just being bitchy. You were a good coach, and honestly I think Emily would have done better with you, but Sasha is just a better match for me. And for Lauren, too, I think."

"What about Kaylie?" he asked.

He already knew the answer, but she gave it to him anyway. "Kaylie's problem was never about her coach, it was about her. It was, _is_, about believing in herself."

"And Kelly? What does she need?"

"She needs a mom. And the only place she's going to get that right now is at my house." Not for the first time, Payson was grateful to have her mom. Kim Keeler had all the love in the world for her daughters and plenty left over to share with Kelly. Kelly needed a mom and Kim would be one for her. "Listen, you should go talk to her; she out in the parking lot. I'll go clean out her locker and give you guys some privacy."

She was walking out of his office with Marty just a few steps behind when he reached out to stop her and asked, "When did you grow up so much?"

"The day I broke my back," she said. It was an absolute lie. Losing her dream hadn't made her grow up, and neither had getting it back. She had grown more mature as she worked with Sasha to become an artistic gymnast, but she could pinpoint the exact moment when she became an adult. She grew up when she read Sasha's goodbye letter, and there was no turning back.

She collected Kelly's stuff quickly and left. As she walked back through the gym, everybody was staring at her. For all she could tell, they hadn't moved since she came in. It creeped her out just a little bit, so she hurried out the door. When she stepped into the glaring sunlight, she was blinded for a moment. As soon as her eyes adjusted to the light she saw that Kelly and Marty were still talking. Kelly had left the car and was leaning against the door while Marty had his hand on her shoulder. Payson decided to give them a their privacy for a little longer; Kelly had really liked and respected Marty as a coach, and saying goodbye to him couldn't be easy.

She pulled out her cell phone and dialed the Rock, needing Sasha to calm the swirl of emotions she'd been drowning in all day. She was thankful that he answered, because having to ask her mom or Summer to pull him off the floor would have been awkward. They would have to make excuses, which she hated, and he wouldn't be able to speak as feely, which she hated even more.

His response to hearing her voice was immediate. "There's not anything wrong, is there?"

"No, nothing's wrong. Well, relatively speaking. I wouldn't call anything in this situation _right_."

His pause was heavy with doubt. "Okay…nothing's wrong, and that's why you're calling me in the middle of training instead of at lunch like you normally do. I'm completely buying that."

She narrowed her eyes as if he could see her; he probably knew what her expression was anyway. "Can we put the sarcasm on hold, please? Kelly is talking to Marty and I wanted to give them a few minutes alone. If I was leaving wouldn't you want to say goodbye in private?"

"If you were leaving, I would come with you."

With that one sentence, all of her tension was gone and the world felt right again. Payson chuckled low in her throat. "How do you do that? How do you always know exactly what I need to hear when I don't even know?"

"I don't do it on purpose," he said. She could almost hear his smile. "I just tell the truth."

"That's the best part." As the word fell from her lips, she watched Marty hug Kelly and turn back toward the gym. "Hey, I've got to go. Kelly's ready to leave."

They said goodbye and hung up, with Payson feeling much more at ease than she had just minutes before. Marty clapped her on the shoulder as he walked by, saying, "I'm proud of you, Payson."

Smiling up at him, she said, "I'm proud of you, too."

Neither needed any explanation for the words. For the first time in months, Marty and Payson were on exactly the same page. They had both grown, both changed, since Marty left the Rock, and both were better people for it.

* * *

><p>They were silent for most of the ride back, but it was a comfortable silence. Payson was so lost in her thoughts that she didn't even notice where they were going until Kelly pulled into the Rock parking lot.<p>

"What are we doing here?" she asked curiously. She had assumed that Kelly wouldn't want to start training until at least the next day. She need time to get over the shock of the last couple of days.

"I'm dropping you off," Kelly answered. "I know you've got clothes inside, you're too much like me not to. So go work out."

Payson expected to see vulnerability or dejection on Kelly's face, but there was nothing but determination. "I don't need to train today, Kelly. I can take a day off."

"I know you want to be in the gym, Keeler…Payson." Payson smiled at Kelly's correction. "_I_ want to be in the gym, but I need sleep more right now. So you go work out and smooch with Sasha while I go home and take a nap without having to snuggle with you, okay?"

Payson ignored the "smooch with Sasha" part of Kelly's speech and focused in on the "home" part. Kelly probably didn't even realize she said it, but calling the Keeler house home was a good sign. Smiling, Payson reached across the gear shift and hugged Kelly around the shoulders. "I'm so glad you're staying, KP."

Kelly pushed her off and commanded, "Get out of my car right now, Keeler, before I have to kill you. I don't do the mushy love stuff, at least not normally."

As soon as Kelly left the parking lot, with Payson's keys in tow, Payson went straight to the office to hug her mom and then Sasha. They were both surprised to see her and immediately asked where Kelly was.

"She went home."

Kim sent her a questioning look. "Home?"

"Yeah," said Payson, her arms still looped loosely around Sasha's waist and a huge smile on her face. "She went home."

* * *

><p>AN: I'm sincerely sorry for the delay in posting this. I had planned to finish and post this chapter last Thursday, but my back problem flared up suddenly. I spent the whole weekend doped up on painkillers and waiting for a doctor's appointment to get a cortisone shot. Yeah, I know…Payson fan…cortisone shot in the back…I know that I'm leaving myself wide open for ridicule.

So Sheila stole from KPE. Did you expect it? We'll find out about the things that Sheila did as the rest of the Rock finds out. This (to steal a phrase from Joss Whedon) is Kelly's story as told by the Rock rebels, with lots of their stuff thrown in as well. Hit the nice little review button and let me know what you think :) I know you're out there, so come out of hiding and review. Sometimes I give out spoilers as rewards :)

There are pictures of Kelly's bookshelves and stuffed tiger linked on my profile.

P.S. Thanks to Fantasylover101 for catching my weird little typing glitch. It's fixed now.


	5. Chapter 5

Disclaimer: I do not own MIOBI. I don't even own the DVDs, I watch it online at abcfamily(dot)com

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><p>The gym was still dark when they pulled up and parked in the spot that said 'Reserved for Kmetko.' Payson hoped that Sasha would be quick about getting it changed to Parker, because the sign made her cringe every time she looked at it.<p>

"I know this is going to sound bitchy, but why is that sign still up?" Kelly asked, taking her keys out of the ignition. "She's been gone for over a month."

Payson shrugged her shoulders. "Sasha keeps putting it off. Taking down her sign means that she's really not coming back, and that's just hard to accept, for all of us. He'll fix it now, though. It's a lot less depressing to change a sign than to take one down."

Changing the sign _was_ less depressing, but it was also a matter of necessity. The Rock parking lot was getting full; spots were reserved for the nationally ranked gymnasts and the lead staff. A year ago, there were spots for each of the three girls and for Marty. Now there were spots for four girls, Austin, Sasha, and Summer. They had talked of reserving a separate spot for Kim so that she and Payson could keep different hours, but it was no longer necessary since Kelly and Payson would likely carpool every day. For some reason that Payson did not understand, Max had not been given a spot yet.

Kelly looked at the darkened front doors. "So, what, are we supposed to sit here and wait for Sasha?"

Rolling her eyes, Payson lifted her keys and shook them. "Are you forgetting that my mom manages this place? We'll open the gym ourselves."

Kelly trailed behind her as she made her way to the doors and unlocked them. "Are you sure Sasha's okay with this?" she asked, with a slight note of worry in her voice. Huh. Payson never pictured Kelly as being a stickler for the rules.

"Of course he's okay with it; that's the only reason he's not here yet. He doesn't bother rushing to get here on time because he knows I can get in on my own." Kelly frowned, obviously not happy with the idea of Sasha shirking his responsibilities, so Payson elaborated. "He's almost always here first, but if he's running a little late he doesn't hurry for me. If it was one of the other girls coming in early he would skip breakfast or speed or something. He should be here any minute."

As Payson predicted, he walked through the door before she had even finished turning on the lights. In his arms was a large stack of files. Eyeing the papers, she said, "I hope you didn't come in on your motorcycle carrying those."

He looked adorably confused. "Would that even be possible?"

Payson and Kelly spoke at the exact same time. "Austin would find a way."—"I'm sure Austin could do it."

They looked at each other in surprise and then both started laughing. Kelly's smile was radiant; even the bruise covering the side of her face couldn't mar the beauty of it. Payson remembered hearing once that when Shirley Temple smiled, she made people believe in a better world. That was the kind of smile that Kelly had. Her fake media smile had won the hearts of thousands, but her real smile would win the hearts of millions.

Sasha looked starstruck. He was watching Kelly laugh with a dazed expression on his face, as if he was seeing an angel where he expected a devil. When they stopped laughing he shook himself free of the enchantment and said, "Kelly, these are all of your files from Denver. I need to go over some of this with you while Payson warms up, or if you'd rather she can come with us."

Payson beamed at Sasha for his thoughtfulness. Kelly was likely feeling very insecure right now and would need the emotional support. Unsurprisingly, Kelly asked for her to accompany them, and all three went into the office.

After sitting down the files, Sasha gently grasped Kelly's chin and examined the bruise covering the side of her face. It wasn't a pretty sight. The swelling was mostly gone, but her skin had turned a mottled purple and there was a broken blood vessel in one eye from the impact of the slap. "How badly does it hurt?"

She averted her eyes as she answered, "Not bad. I don't really feel it at all unless I touch it."

He let go of her chin and stepped back a little, recognizing her embarrassment and respecting her unspoken need to hide the bruise. "Does it affect your vision at all?"

Payson and Kelly looked at each other, both surprised by the question. It was a possibility that they had never considered. Looking back at Sasha, Kelly answered, "No, not at all. That can happen?"

"It's not common, but, yes, it can happen. The eye is a pretty sensitive organ, but if you haven't had any blurriness or double vision by now, you should be fine. I am worried about the swelling, though. Put your hand over your right eye." She followed his directions, and he began to move his hand around the side of her damaged eye, checking her peripheral vision. He frowned, unhappy with the results. "No bars today. You need the full scope of your vision to safely work on the bars, and you're not quite there yet. We'll check every day, and you can go back to training them as soon as the swelling is completely gone."

Kelly nodded and lowered her eyes again. Sasha motioned for them to take a seat, so Payson led Kelly to the couch while he pulled a chair in front of them. "We need to talk about your ankle. I see you've had five cortisone shots this year. Has anyone spoke with you about the dangers associated with long term use of cortisone?"

"What do you mean? What dangers?" she asked, looking back into his eyes.

Payson recognized the anger in Sasha's tense posture, but she doubted Kelly would notice. It was very subtle, but it was there. He wanted to throttle someone; Sheila, a doctor, whoever it was that had neglected Kelly's health. "Cortisone causes tendon deterioration, and its effects are worst on the ankle. It is a risk that most of us are willing to take on a short term basis, but it shouldn't be used more than is absolutely necessary to compete. If you keep getting shots at this frequency, your ankle will not hold up until the Olympics."

Kelly's eyes watered but she did not allow herself to cry. There was a note of outrage in her voice when she finally spoke. "Why didn't anyone tell me this? Someone should have told me! Was everybody going to just stand by and let me lose gymnastics?"

"It was bad management, Kelly," Sasha sighed, reaching out to take her hand. "Different people were giving you the shots every time and nobody knew how many you were getting. I wouldn't have known, either, if I hadn't read your files so closely. You physical therapist should have talked to you about the dangers when you were first injured."

"I never had physical therapy," Kelly said with a furrowed brow. "My mom said it was a waste of time that I couldn't afford. All I've ever had were those strengthening exercises that you gave me in Rio."

Sasha's face turned to stone. If Kelly hadn't been in the room, he probably would have punched a hole through the wall. Instead, he just scribbled a note on his clipboard and said, "The Rock has a contract with a physical therapist here in Boulder. I'll call and see if he can work you in tomorrow. You'll do PT at least three times a week until your ankle is back to full strength. As long as you train here I expect you to be completely honest about your pain, and if I tell you to rest it then you do as I say."

"Yes, sir." In all the time that Payson had known Kelly, she had never once heard her utter the word 'sir,' but Sasha's voice commanded respect. Even fearless Kelly Parker knew better than to oppose him when he spoke with that voice.

"Okay," he began, his voice losing some of its hard edge, "Go downstairs and warm up. I'll be down in a few minutes to start on floor with you."

Payson walked to the door with Kelly, but then changed her mind and told Kelly to start without her. Walking back to where Sasha still sat facing the couch, she laid her hand on his shoulder with gentle pressure. He was so tightly coiled that she expected him to lose it at any minute.

"I think that I might drive to Denver tonight and run her mother over with my truck." He sounded a little too serious for Payson's comfort.

"I know you're angry," she said. "I am too, but we have to focus on the good here. Sheila's out of her life now. She's getting the help she needs for her ankle. And she actually smiled today; that's hopeful, right? I've only seen her really smile once before, when we won the team gold at Worlds."

Sasha's shoulder relaxed beneath her hand. He swiveled his chair to face her and rested one hand lightly on her hip, a small smile gracing his lips as he considered Payson's words. "I couldn't believe what I was seeing down there. Who would have guessed that the infamous Kelly Parker had such a beautiful smile?"

Payson grinned down at him. "I know. She could conquer the world with a smile like that. People would fall at her feet."

He squeezed her hip and then stood up. "You should go down there with her. Her ears are probably ringing from us talking about her."

Sasha moved to the desk and Payson moved to the door, but she turned around before she stepped onto the small platform outside. "Sasha? Just so you know, I told Kelly about…us." She winced at the wording because it made them sound like a couple, but she didn't know how else to say it. "I figured that if she was going to live with me, she was going to figure it out eventually, so I might as well be upfront."

"Was she… okay with it? I don't want to make her uncomfortable." He blew right past the word 'us,' like he didn't even notice it. He probably didn't. She was being paranoid, obviously, and making the word into a bigger deal than it was. She just didn't want anything to screw up what they had, not again.

Payson shrugged one shoulder. "She said that she was a little weirded out, but she wasn't going to say anything to anyone. She might make some jokes, though. That seems to be her way of dealing with things."

"Okay," Sasha nodded. "Then go warm up. I'll be down in five."

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><p>Their early morning practice was productive, even if it was cut short. They started late due to the meeting with Sasha, and ended early when Lauren, in a rare selfless act, came in at seven thirty to help Kelly cover the bruise with makeup.<p>

With Kelly's permission, Payson had brought Kaylie and Lauren home with her after training the day before, and they were acquainted with the basic details of the situation. Sasha had addressed the entire gym and told them that the Rock "had the honor of becoming Kelly Parker's home gym," but only the elite girls knew the reasons behind the move. Kaylie and Lauren were supportive and understanding; they had all formed a bond at Worlds, and both Rock girls knew what it was like to have a less than perfect mother.

Lauren did a good job concealing Kelly's injuries, but no amount of makeup could fully hide them, and there was nothing they could do about the red miasma that covered Kelly's left eye. To save her from embarrassment, the three Rock girls had decided to form a tight group around her so that the other gymnasts would not get close enough to see through Lauren's masterful cover job.

The ruse worked well, but the close quarters they were keeping made it obvious that something was going on. Payson didn't understand the dynamic that had seeped into their group. Kelly alternated between looking at the ground and closely watching Sasha's interactions with Payson. Payson knew the reasons behind these behaviors. Kelly's emotions were all over the place right now, and her intense study of the floor was her way of staying in control. When she did look up, she was obviously trying to gauge the extent of Payson and Sasha's relationship. Lauren and Kaylie's behavior was more confusing. Neither was making eye contact with Payson, although they seemed perfectly comfortable with each other and with Kelly. It had been the same yesterday, but Payson was too preoccupied with Kelly's situation to pay much attention. Now, in such a tight group, she had no choice but to notice.

All in all, she was glad when lunch rolled around. They all took their lunches outside to eat on the grass. It was starting to turn chilly, but Boulder was thankfully a very temperate town and they could eat outside most of the year. When Austin and Max approached them half way through their meal, Kelly resolutely turned so that they could only see her in profile. She had agreed that Austin should be told, since he often worked closely with the elite girls, but that didn't mean that she was completely comfortable with him seeing her injuries. Payson and Kaylie both engaged their boyfriends in conversation to deflect attention from Kelly.

Payson turned to Max. "So, I've been meaning to ask you, what the hell is going on with you and Sasha? I know you're not supposed to be doing upper body work yet, so you can't do skills, but he's been conditioning you like crazy. The last time I saw him like that was when we went to that kegger."

"Yeah, he's been doing that ever since I got back in the gym," Max answered with a grimace. "He told me a while back that if I ever hurt one of his gymnasts he would make my life a living hell, and I guess he's living up to his word."

Payson frowned, not because of the punishment that Sasha was giving Max, but because of the reason for the punishment. He knew that Payson was with Max now and seemed okay with it, but the fact remained that Max had hurt Lauren. A lot. Payson generally tried to ignore Max's previous involvement with her teammate, but it couldn't be avoided completely.

Austin broke her train of thought. "You should have taken him more seriously, man. I think he's pretty much given up on the no dating rule or he would have kicked you out, but he's seriously protective of these three…well, four now. You should have heard him talk to me about Kaylie. I'm not easily intimidated, but he scared the shit out of me."

"Really?" Kaylie asked, sitting up on her knees. "I didn't know he talked to you about me. What did he say?"

"He said," Austin put on a British accent and mimicked Sasha's voice, "'You know I like you, and respect you as a gymnast, but I'm telling you now that if you ever hurt Kaylie, I will destroy you.' And he was smiling the whole time; that was the worst part."

Kaylie cooed. "Aww, that's so sweet."

"Sweet?" Max asked, his voice cracking. "I think the word you're looking for is psychotic. That man is completely insane."

"Well, duh. He's Sasha Belov." Everyone turned toward Kelly in shock, unsure what to make of her words. With her typical haughty expression in place, she continued, "Oh, come on. He's the best gymnastics coach _ever_. Do really think he had so much success by doing things the normal way? He wouldn't be so good if he wasn't so crazy."

Payson couldn't help but smile, partly at seeing Kelly with a little attitude, which she hadn't had since she talked to Sasha about her ankle, and partly because the words were so true. She was right; Sasha's methods were unorthodox and probably a little crazy, but that was why he was such a good coach. She was certain that no other coach in the world would have taken her to the ballet or taken dance lessons with her, but she was equally certain that no other coach could have possibly led her to a World Championship after her injury.

Toward the end of lunch, Max took her hand and led her away while the others lounged around talking. They walked around the corner of the building and, once they were out of sight, he slipped his arms around her waist. He kissed her briefly on the lips and said, "I missed you."

"I missed you, too." It was mostly true. She hadn't thought about him much, but when she did think about him she had missed him. She felt a little guilty that she had called Sasha far more frequently than she had called Max.

He pulled her closer and lowered his lips to hers. They had kissed a few times while they were in Rio, but they hadn't had much time together since she was in the All-Around and most of the event finals. None of the kisses she had experienced so far had been like this. She wound her arms around his neck as he deepened the kiss, and somewhere in the back of her mind she mused that, for the first time in her life, she was making out. Her emotions were complex. She felt excitement; she felt pleasure at the fact that she was finally doing what Lauren and Kaylie had done so many times; and she felt a niggling sense that something was wrong. She didn't know what could possibly be wrong. She had a boyfriend who thought she was beautiful, and he was kissing her, and for once in her life she was a _normal_ girl. It must be guilt; she felt like something was wrong because she felt guilty for breaking the rules.

When they all went back inside, the unease between the girls came back in full force, and it was made all the worse by the fact that Payson couldn't quite bring herself to look in Sasha's eyes when he came by to tell her and Kelly that they both had a meeting with James Jansen as soon as practice was over. The day could not end soon enough.

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><p>Kelly and Payson both collapsed onto the bed when they came into their room. Payson turned her head sideways to look at Kelly. "I never knew meeting with an agent could be that exhausting. I would rather spend eight hours training than half an hour talking about <em>contracts<em>."

Kelly laughed when Payson put a distasteful emphasis on the last word. "Yeah, that was pretty damn boring. I'm glad that he took me on as a client, though. It's one less thing to worry about. I'm surprised, though. Austin has been his only client since the Beijing Olympics, and I always heard that he didn't like to have his interests spread."

"I think he's doing it as a favor to Austin. I know that Austin talked him into doing the media tour with me. But he seems like a good guy, and at least we know that he's not going to shove endorsement stuff down our throats like…" Payson trailed off and mentally slapped herself in the head.

Kelly finished the thought for her. "Like my mom."

"Yeah," she said with a heavy sigh. "I'm sorry, Kel. I shouldn't have brought that up."

"It's okay. It's not like we can ignore her forever. Eventually she's going to come up in a conversation."

Payson raised herself up on one elbow and asked Kelly the question that had been bothering her all day. "You do know that none of this is your fault, right? You didn't do anything wrong."

"I know," she said, covering her face with her hands. "I just feel like such an idiot. I'm Kelly Parker, I take down the competition with just a single sentence. I should have been able to stop this."

"There shouldn't have been anything to stop. She betrayed your trust, Kelly. Mothers are supposed to protect their children and she didn't. She's the one who should be ashamed, not you." Payson still couldn't grasp the idea anyone being so depraved as to hurt their own child. It went against nature.

When Kelly finally spoke, after a long moment of silence, her voice was soft and sad. "I just wanted to make her love me."

Payson wrapped Kelly in a tight hug and whispered in her ear, "You don't have to earn love, Kel. It's a gift. I love you, Mom and Dad love you, Sasha loves you. Nothing you could ever do will take that away."

The silent tears that Kelly cried broke Payson more than any of her wracking sobs had. She remembered how, earlier today, Sasha had looked a Kelly like he was seeing an angel. That was what she looked like now, except that the laughing angel of the morning was replaced by a broken, shattered angel. It must be a mortal sin, she thought, to make an angel cry.

Hours later, after Kelly had cried herself out, after the family had dinner, after Becca had made the first tentative steps toward getting to know the newest member of their family, the two girls laid facing each other in the bed and having a quite conversation.

"Payson?"

"Hmm?"

"Do you love Sasha?"

Payson opened her eyes from the half-sleeping state she had been in and considered Kelly's question. "Yes. I'm not _in_ love with him, but I do love him. He's family."

"You know how I told you it creeped me out?" Kelly mumbled. "It doesn't creep me out anymore."

"Why not?"

"I watched you. The way you were together this morning seemed so _right_, and then when the others came in and you started acting all professional it was like the sun had gone out. You two should always be right together." Kelly wasn't making sense at all, which wasn't surprising since her words were slurred with sleep. Payson got the point, though. Kelly approved of her relationship with Sasha, and that meant a lot.

"Thanks, Kelly." With that, both girls drifted to sleep.

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><p>Payson was only dimly aware of a buzzing noise. Fumbling on her nightstand, still mostly asleep, she grabbed her phone and pulled it under the covers, where her head currently was, to see a text message from Sasha.<p>

_Is everything ok? I havent heard from u all day_

**Sorry :( It was craszy and i forgor 2 call**

_R u asleep?_

**Yes**

_Lol. Ill talk to u later when u can type_

**No. ill wake up. Talk now**

_Hows Kelly?_

**Better. She said shes not creeped out by us nemore**

_Lol. That's good_

_U seemed weird 2day. Whats wrong?_

**Ill tell u later.**

**Do u know y kay and lo wont look at me?**

_I dont know about kay but lo will talk to u 2morrow_

**?**

_Let her tell u_

**Ok. **

**Thanx 4 being there w/ james**

**Mom and dad dont understand most of it**

**Neither do i**

_Me neither and i did it for years_

_I just know when u r getting ripped off_

_But james doesnt do that_

**Im glad he took Kelly 2**

_Me 2. Is ur dad going to run kpe?_

**I think so**

**But I dont know 4 sure**

_I hope he does_

_U should go 2 sleep now. Its late_

**Ok. Miss hearing ur voice 2night**

_Me 2. Dont forget again :(_

**I wont**

**Night**

_Night_

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><p>AN: The texting was necessary to cheer me up, because I cried during the last part with Kelly. Plus it got across some important information. But poor Payson and Sasha are still in denial.

It may seem like Kelly and Payson bonded too quickly, but it is actually true to life. When you are with someone through something like that, they become family immediately and nothing can ever break that bond. That, along with the stuff about Kelly being forced to compete injured, is from real experiences.

As for the stuff about Kelly's smile… if you have ever seen Nicole Anderson laugh spontaneously, you'll get it. Her smile is so contagious that I think she could probably end wars with it.

Review, please, because like I said…I cried writing this. I need reviews to make me happy again. And I see bribery works, so the offer still stands: reviews=free spoilers.


	6. Chapter 6

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI, I don't make money from this. If you want to pay me, though, feel free to slide some money my way under the table ;)

A/N: This chapter got way too long, so several things got moved to Chapter 7, including the scene I promised several of you where Kelly reads those text messages from last chapter. Sorry guys! But I promise, you will get that scene soon.

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><p>Sasha was already in his office when they got to the gym at 6 am, and he didn't come out until they finished their warm up and were getting a drink from the water cooler.<p>

"Hey," he said, leaning up against the railing and looking down at Payson. "Do you want to talk about whatever it was that was bothering you yesterday?"

She was shocked that he was being so open in front of Kelly. He must have sensed, like Payson did, that Kelly was being honest when she said she was okay with their friendship. With a look, Payson silently asked Kelly for permission to go with him. The petite brunette held up her hands as if surrendering. "Hey, I'm not going to stop you. But if this is code for 'do you want to make out,' then I don't want to know about it. I'm going to the beam to work on my aerial series, and if I look through that window I better not see the two of you going at it."

Sasha chucked as she walked away. "You did explain to her that we're not involved, right?"

"I told you to expect jokes," Payson reminded him, climbing the steps to his office. "She's still Kelly Parker, she's not going to pass up an opportunity to make fun of us."

Payson hopped up on his desk and he settled into his chair before he asked, "So what's up? What was going on yesterday?"

"It was a lot of things," she answered, scrunching her nose in distaste. "I was worried about Kelly, and I don't know what's going on with Lauren and Kaylie. They haven't looked me in the eye once since I got back and I have no idea why."

He took her hand and absentmindedly stroked his thumb across her skin. "I have a theory with Kaylie. I think maybe she's uncomfortable with having lost her spot at the top, and she just doesn't know how to act around you now that you're number one again. Give her time; she'll come around."

"And Lauren? You know what's going on with her?"

Sasha grimaced. He was hiding something from her and she didn't like it. "Yes, but she needs to tell you herself. You know I hate keeping things from you, but this just isn't something that I have a right to share."

"Okay," she said, squeezing his hand. "I get it, it's a coaching thing. I won't push."

"There's something else though, I can tell. What else is bothering you?" Sasha was way too perceptive sometimes. She didn't keep secrets from him, not really, but she wasn't entirely comfortable talking about Max with him. She was honest with him about their relationship, but it was a subject which she generally tried to avoid.

It was her turn to grimace. "I had lunch with Max yesterday. It was nice, but I just felt… guilty. Like I was doing something wrong."

Sasha leaned back in his chair with a sigh. "You know how I feel about him, Payson."

"He's not as bad as you think," she said, nudging his leg with her bare foot. "He's just _normal_. I like normal."

"You're not normal, Pay," he said with a frown, "and a normal boy is never going to make you happy. You should be with someone who's as passionate as you are, someone who understands you."

"Please," she scoffed, "The only person in the world who understands me is you."

The room was filled with a heavy silence. Her statement had connotations that neither was comfortable with, and it was too late to take the words back. Too uncomfortable to look at him, she got off his desk and went to watch Kelly through the glass door. With her arms crossed and her posture rigid, she asked, "Is it really so bad to want to be normal? Is it _so_ bad to want to be like Kaylie and Lauren?"

She heard him approach her but didn't turn around; she wasn't ready to look at him yet. He wrapped his arms around her from behind and she felt herself relax against his broad chest. Her body was betraying her. Bending down, he whispered in her ear, "Didn't anyone tell you not to give into peer pressure?"

She stiffened again and pulled away from him. "This isn't a joke, Sasha. You may not like Max, but at least he wants me."

He was staring at her in shock, and Payson was pretty sure that, were it physically possible, she would be staring at herself in shock, too. Her meaning was all too clear—Max wanted her, and Sasha did not.

"Payson, I—"

She held up a hand to stop him. "Don't. I didn't mean that. I don't even know why I said it. I'm just stressed, and things are weird with everybody, and I don't… I'm sorry. I didn't mean to take it out on you."

He put his hands on her shoulders, considered his actions for a minute, and then slid his hands up to cup her neck just under her jaw line. She had messed things up between them; normally he wouldn't have hesitated with the more familiar touch. "What can I do to help, Pay?"

"I don't know… could you maybe ease up on Max a little? He's angry at you and you don't like him, and it just puts me in an awkward position, like I have to choose sides."

He dropped his hands to his side with a heavy breath. "You know I can't do that, and you shouldn't have asked me. You're right, I don't like him. I think he's an arse who waffled between you and Lauren and pitted you against each other. But me not liking him has nothing to do with his punishment. I warned him what would happen if he hurt either of you and he chose to ignore me. He hurt Lauren and now he's paying the price."

"It's been a week, Sasha! Don't you think that's enough?"

"No." His voice was cold and hard. "I don't think that a week's worth of punishment is enough for jerking around a girl who is vulnerable already. I gave him two days for making you cry at the party, and what he did to Lauren was far worse. He'll do _at least_ two weeks for her."

"She threw herself at him!" she cried, her frustration making her blunt. Sasha was supposed to be the person she came to for comfort, and he was making everything worse.

"That doesn't make it right!"

"I don't want to fight with you, Sasha," she said, pressing the heels of both hands against her eyes in frustration. She saw stars. "Things are bad enough as it is."

"You know I care about you, Payson." The fact that he had his back turned toward her didn't do much to justify that statement, but she knew it was true. She also knew that he was royally pissed about what she had just asked him to do. "But I can't compromise my integrity as a coach because of our friendship. You should never have put me in that position."

There was a long pause during which she should have said "I'm sorry," but she didn't. She was sorry, she just wasn't ready to say it yet. Finally, Sasha heaved a sigh and turned to face her. "Spend the morning conditioning. You know what I expect, and I assume that you're responsible enough to do it without supervision. Try to clear your mind while you're at it, because you cannot safely train in your current mindset."

Payson should have said "Yes, sir," but she was not particularly in the mood to be that respectful, so she nodded once and left. She had crossed a line asking him to go easy on Max, but he didn't fully understand how much pressure it put on her for her best friend and her boyfriend to be at odds. She was incredibly tense; at any minute she could either lash out or burst into tears, and she wasn't sure which one it would be.

She stormed across the gym, ignoring Kelly's confused call from the beam; Sasha would explain. Instead, she threw herself headlong into the exercise and forgot everything else for the next two hours. After the first half hour, she had to admit that Sasha had a point. Her head and her emotions were all over the place, and the mindless activity was helping to calm her down. The only things she thought about were her repetitive movements and the burning strain of her muscles, at least until 8 o'clock rolled around and people started filing into the gym.

Everyone was staring at her. She could feel their eyes boring into the back of her head and hear their whispers as she worked her way through what everyone recognized as Sasha's punishment routine. They were trying to guess what she had done wrong; she had never once had to do this conditioning circuit by herself. The only times she had ever been punished were with the other elite girls, whenever they got too catty.

To clear her head, Payson visualized an open door. Then she imagined herself on one side, and everyone else on the other side. She made sure all the whispers, the gossip, and the stares were pushed to the other side of that door and slammed it shut. As soon as she was certain that she was alone in her mind, she went to the ropes and started climbing. The best part of that particular exercise was that she was mostly high enough that she didn't hear people talking about her. The worst part was that when Sasha bellowed her name from across the gym, she nearly fell off and broke her neck. He should have known better than to do that.

She jogged over to where he was standing with Lauren and one of the assistant coaches, Tara. "Were you _trying_ to make me fall off the ropes?"

Sasha ignored the question and said, "Lauren needs to speak with you. Tara will accompany you both to the trainer's room so that you can talk in private."

Payson raised on eyebrow in question. "Doesn't Tara being there defeat the point of talking in private? No offense, Tara."

"I think an impartial observer might be… beneficial. She won't get involved in the conversation; she's just there in case she's needed." It wasn't even a real answer, which meant that he was hiding something. Payson would bet her World Title that whatever Lauren needed to tell her was going to be bad.

"Fine, whatever. Let's get this over with so I can get back to training. That is, if I'm _allowed_ to train now?" she asked archly. This was exactly the kind of thing that she was supposed to avoid while the other gymnasts were around; being this flippant with her coach wouldn't exactly be considered normal. Pretending like she hadn't just said something borderline insubordinate, Payson spun on her heel and marched to the trainer's room.

As soon as Lauren and Tara followed her into the room and closed the door, Payson turned and said, "Okay, spill. What's going on? You've been acting weird ever since I got back."

Now that she was looking at Lauren instead of focusing on her frustration with Sasha, Payson noticed that the girl look terrified. She was biting her lip, her eyes were filled with tears, and she was edging toward the door as if she might bolt at any second. Instantly, all of her frustration evaporated and was replaced by concern for her friend. "Lo, what's wrong?"

A sob burst from Lauren's lips as she said, "I was the one who sent the picture to Ellen Beals, Payson. I'm so sorry! I was upset, and jealous, and I made a mistake. Oh God, Payson, I'm so sorry!"

Payson was experiencing something very strange. She had split into three parts. The Payson on the left wanted to lunge at Lauren, rip her hair out and claw her skin; the Payson on the right wanted to curl up into a ball and cry; the Payson in the middle, the corporeal one, was completely calm. Somewhere deep in the back of her mind, that calm disturbed her. There was something wrong with not feeling emotion at a time like this.

"Wow."

Lauren sniffled. "What does wow mean? Like wow, you really want to punch me or wow, this sucks but you can forgive me?"

"Just wow. As in wow, I can't believe I'm surprised by this. Of course it was you. I don't know why I didn't realize it before. I mean, you slept with Kaylie's boyfriend, you sabotaged Emily in France," she glared when Lauren looked like she was going to protest. "Don't even, try, Lauren. You know it's true. I don't know why I thought that you wouldn't do something to hurt me, too."

"I wasn't trying to hurt you, Payson. I just wanted Sasha and Summer to break up so she could be my mom."

"You weren't trying to hurt me?" Payson scoffed. "How many times did you make jokes about Sasha being my boyfriend or me having a thing for older men? How many times did you blame _me_ for Sasha leaving when you knew it was your fault?"

Lauren snapped. Throwing her hands up in frustration, she said something that, for once, Payson believed was true: "I was jealous, okay? Sasha was always doing special things with you, and he gave you his Olympic gold medal. When he got kicked out of the Rock, _you_ were the only one he kept coaching. When he left, _you_ were the only one who got a letter. It wasn't fair! He was supposed to be my coach, too!"

Payson was floored. Images were flashing rapid-fire through her head. Sasha coming to her house, taking her to the ballet, having dinner with her, creating a new award for her. The gold medal, the paints, the dance classes, the late night practices. It struck her now how inappropriate that must have looked, and she was forced to admit that Lauren had a point. Unable to argue against her, she went for a complete non-sequitur. "How long has Sasha known?"

"What?" Lauren hiccupped, surprised out of her tears.

"Sasha. He set up this little confrontation, so obviously he knew the truth. How long?" She couldn't believe he kept this from her.

Wiping her eyes, and apparently glad that the conversation had moved away from her, Lauren answered, "I told him in Rio, during the team finals. He forgave me. Can't you forgive me, too?"

When she heard Lauren's answer, violent-Payson and emotional-Payson banded together to push calm-Payson out of the way, but neither were interested in Lauren. Angry tears stung her eyes. She pushed her way out of the trainer's room, letting the door crash against the wall behind her, and stormed across the gym to where her coach was standing.

"Two and a half weeks!" she screamed, reaching Sasha and shoving hard against his chest. "You've known for two and a half weeks and you didn't tell me!"

He trapped her hands, which were attempting to leave bruises anywhere she could reach on his arms and torso, and yelled, "Payson! Calm the hell down, right now!"

She reflexively responded to his coaching voice and stopped struggling against him. He looked over her shoulder and said, "I thought I told you not to let her attack anybody?"

Tara's voice came floating from behind her, breathless. "She's hard to catch. Besides, I thought she would attack Lauren, not you."

Payson had forgotten about Tara. She swallowed her tears, which had started as soon as she lost her calm, and angled herself so that she could see both coaches and Lauren all at once. "Lauren's a bitch, everyone knows that, but you," she said, jabbing a finger in Sasha's direction, "I expected better from."

"I asked him not to tell you," Lauren said, her voice raspy from crying. "I wanted to tell you myself, I wanted to explain—"

Payson cut her off. "Don't try to talk to me like we're friends, Lauren. We're not. If you were really my friend, you wouldn't have sent that video to Beals, and you wouldn't have spent the last couple of months mocking me because of it." She turned to Sasha. "And you should not have kept this from me. I had a right to know."

Payson made her way through the crowd that had surrounded them and went to the office, intent of borrowing her mother's keys and getting the hell away from the Rock. She chose to ignore Sasha as he followed her through the door.

"Mom, can I borrow your car for a little while?"

"No," Sasha said, cutting off her mom's answer. "You are not running away. You're going to sit down and talk about this like a rational human being."

Kim was staring at them in confusion and worry. "Okay, someone better tell me what's going on right now. I heard screaming out there. What happened?"

Payson turned toward her mother, confident of having an ally in her. "I just found out that Lauren was the one who sent the training cam video to Ellen Beals, and Sasha has known about it since the team finals at Worlds."

Several emotions flashed across Kim's face in the span of seconds. Gaining control of herself, she said, "Okay. I think Sasha's right, we need to be rational about this."

"Rational?" Payson asked scathingly, hurt that her mom was taking Sasha's side. "Lauren wasn't _rational_ when she decided to do something that could have ruined my career and Sasha's life. You're supposed to be on my side, mom."

"Payson, sit down," Sasha commanded, using his coaching voice again, which she could not say no to. She went to sit on the couch and he turned to her mom. "Kim, I know you're her mother and you want to be here for her, but I think we need to have this conversation alone. Would you please give us the office?"

Payson took a moment to marvel at how Sasha could hide so much authority behind such compassionate words. Kim didn't hesitate to leave any more than Payson had hesitated to sit down. As soon as they were alone, he sat beside her on the couch and took her hand.

He lifted her chin so that she was looking at him instead of her knees. Her eyes were hazy with unshed tears. "Rational, okay? And one thing at a time. Can you do that?"

She nodded once, and he continued, "Okay. Why you were hitting me? You know that I couldn't have told you before, not while you were competing and not while you had obligations to the media. So why are you angry with me?"

She thought for a long time before she answered, sniffling. "Because it's safer to be angry with you than it is to be angry with Lauren. I know eventually I'll stop being mad at you, but if I let myself feel that way toward Lauren, I might never stop. …Besides, I was already angry with you from this morning, so it wasn't a big leap."

Sasha chuckled at her stupid joke, but didn't let her stray from the subject. "Why don't you want to be angry with Lauren? It's a normal thing to feel, nobody would blame you."

Payson studied her fingernails intently while she collected her thoughts. She wasn't sure she wanted to talk about this, but she couldn't help but wonder if all the blame really fell with Lauren. Gathering her courage, she looked into his eyes and asked, "Sasha, do you think this is our fault?"

"What do you mean?" He sounded baffled, but there was something in his eyes that said he knew exactly what she meant.

"Lauren said that she was jealous, because you spent so much time with me, and we did so many special things together. Is she right? Did I… steal you away from the other girls?"

Sasha sighed and sank back against the couch cushions. Payson leaned back with him and rested her face against the cool leather, facing him. "You didn't do anything wrong Payson, I did. I made so many mistakes that led to Lauren's actions, the worst of which was getting involved with Summer, because I knew better and I did it anyway. I should never have put Lauren in that position."

"And me?" The mention of Summer was a low blow to distract Payson from the subject, but she wasn't going to let him get away with it. The fact that he was being evasive meant that what he was about to say was important.

"I compared our relationship to the relationship I had with Nicolai, and in a lot of ways that was true. I didn't treat you any differently than Nicolai treated me, but I over looked some very important differences. I was his only elite gymnast while we worked together, but I had four other elites training under me. I have never worked with a gymnast like you, Payson. We have the kind of connection that every coach hopes to find one day, like Nicolai had with me, and I let myself get caught up in that. I was so passionate about working with you that I neglected the other girls and Austin. I am proud of what you and I accomplished together, but my behavior toward the others was unforgivable." He looked ashamed, and Payson hated that she had played a part in making him feel that way.

"You said differences, plural. What else was different?" She almost didn't ask. The look on his face made her regret pushing him in the first place, but she needed to know, and suspected that it was something he needed to say.

"You caught that, huh?" he said, nudging their joined hands against her thigh. "I overlooked something very, very important. There is a huge difference between a man coaching a male gymnast and a man coaching a female gymnast, and I failed to take that into account. I crossed so many lines with you, Payson, and continue to cross lines. I have gone over everything leading up to that kiss, and I am completely to blame for the misunderstanding. My actions toward you were not appropriate, which is why you thought there was something more to our relationship."

Payson grimaced. "Speaking of inappropriate," she said, indicating their relative positions. They looked intimate, reclined together on the couch with their hands entwined, their heads bent together. They had moved closer as they spoke until their noses were just inches apart. "If anyone happened to walk in here, this would look like something that it's not."

"You're right." He sat up and pulled her up with him, then moved to form a larger gap between them. "Better?"

"Better," she said with a sharp nod. "So, you really don't think any of this is my fault?"

"No, I don't."

"Good, then I'm free to hate Lauren." Her own guilt had been holding her back, but now that Sasha had assured her that she'd done nothing wrong, all of her original resentment returned in full force.

Sasha was trying to look disapproving, but his slight smile ruined the effect. "You are not free to hate Lauren, Pay. She did something horrible, yes, but she is human and humans make mistakes."

Something clicked in Payson head and she remembered Lauren's words in the trainer's room. "She said that you forgave her. Why? She almost ruined your life because she was being petty. How can you forgive that?"

"I'm her coach, Payson, it's my job to forgive her. And I know that I am not blameless in this mess. She did something to hurt me, yes, but I hurt her as well. My actions weren't intentional, but the results are still the same."

"But what about responsibility?" Payson asked. "Every time she does something wrong everyone forgives her and moves on, and she turns around and does something horrible again. It's an endless cycle and I'm tired of it."

"So hold her accountable. I have. I've talked to her and she knows that if this type of behavior continues there will no longer be a place for her in this gym. Set ground rules for her. Let her know that she has to earn your forgiveness." Sasha reached out and took her hand again. "I believe that she can be a better person, but nobody has ever held her accountable before. We can be the ones who give her what she needs to grow."

She nodded her head slowly. There was wisdom in what he was saying, but she needed time to process everything. "Can you give me a few minutes? I need to think about this."

"Take all the time you need, but when you're done thinking, you need to talk to Lauren." He squeezed her hand once and stood, but she stopped him before he walked away.

"I'm sorry, for this morning."

"I'm sorry, too. I won't change my mind about Max, but I should have been more considerate of your feelings." She was surprised by his apology. She had very much been the one to blame for the argument, but she appreciated that he was taking part of the responsibility. He flashed a tight smile and left, leaving Payson alone with her very confused thoughts.

* * *

><p>The only place Lauren ever felt safe was on the beam. It was ironic, really. Most people were terrified of the beam. Those four inches were like home to her, her shelter from the storm. And right now there was definitely a storm to take shelter from.<p>

Everybody knew what she did. Payson had said it in front of the entire gym, and now nobody would look at her. They were all waiting to see what Payson would do so that they could follow suit. She had expected it, but that didn't make it suck any less. She knew the gym's loyalty was with Payson. That sort of bugged her, but she couldn't help but admit that Payson had earned the loyalty. Ever since her injury, Payson had been a leader in the gym. She didn't ignore people like she used to; she always smiled and talked to the little kids, and helped the juniors when they were learning new skills. Payson was the only reason that the Rock didn't crumble when Sasha left. It was just one more thing that Payson could do that Lauren couldn't.

Things had been so much better since Worlds. Their team was getting along, and Sasha was paying attention to her, and Summer had promised that she would always be there for her. It sucked that Max had chosen Payson, but at least it was fun to watch Sasha punish him every day. If Payson didn't forgive her, everything would be ruined.

She'd just landed her standing full, one of her best elements, when Kelly approached her. Lauren steeled herself for the confrontation. Payson and Kelly had been inseparable these past few days, so devil-horns had no doubt come to play her stupid little mind games on Lauren for hurting her friend. Hopping off the beam, she asked, "What do you want, Parker? Come to defend your roommate's honor?"

"Actually, no," said Kelly, biting her lip. "I came over to say that I understand, and I'm not choosing sides."

What? This had to be a set up; she was obviously trying to knock Lauren off her guard by being nice before she went in for the kill. "Yeah right. You and Payson are all buddy-buddy now. Do you really expect me to believe that this isn't one of your little tricks?"

"Okay, you have a point," Kelly conceded. "I haven't done anything to earn your trust, so you have no reason to believe me. All I'm saying is that I get it. I've lashed out a few times in my life, too. I can't support what you did, but I can understand it."

"Well… thanks, I guess. It's nice to know that there is at least one person in the gym who doesn't hate me." She still wasn't sure what Kelly's motives were, but she wasn't really in a place to pass up friends right now. If Kelly turned on her, Lauren could always fight back. Kelly might actually be a worthy adversary.

"Do you want a work-out partner? It really sucks to train alone."

Lauren was stunned. She figured that Kelly would decamp as quickly as possible after her little rally speech, but here she was offering to train together. "Yeah, uh, okay. Do you want the beam? I was pretty much done for now."

Lauren studied Kelly while she worked on the beam. She seemed sincere, but it was Kelly Parker, so that didn't mean anything. She was a great actress, kind of like Lauren herself, so anything she said was always questionable. But she did seem to be trying really hard to fit in at the Rock, and it's not like she had anywhere else to go if she burned her bridges here. Lauren decided that if Kelly was offering an olive branch, she might as well offer one too. She was going to need all the friends she could get after this morning.

"Hey Kelly?"

"Yeah?"

"If it makes you feel any better, I know what it's like to have a shitty mom. Just… you're not alone, okay?"

Kelly smiled at her. It was small and sad, but it was a smile nonetheless. "Thanks, Lauren."

* * *

><p>Payson wasn't sure how long she sat in the office alone. She hadn't looked at the clock when she came in, but she was pretty sure it had been at least half an hour. That annoyed her; it was wasted time that could have been spent training. This whole morning had sucked. She fought with Sasha, she didn't get to work on the changes she wanted to make to her bars routine, and then the cherry on top of her shitty-day sundae had been Lauren's betrayal.<p>

She'd spent the majority of her time alone getting her roiling emotions in check. Her anger with Lauren and her own guilt were battling against each other, and all of her confusion from this morning was lingering in the back of her mind, popping out like a jack-in-the-box whenever she gained some semblance of balance. When she finally found an even keel, one thing stood clear in her mind: she would not be like Kaylie. She would not forgive Lauren and let herself be duped again. Sasha said to hold her accountable, and that was exactly what Payson was going to do.

She didn't need to say anything when she opened the door. Sasha always knew when she was present in the room, and his eyes found hers within seconds. He nodded once and walked to where Lauren and Kelly were working on the beam. Payson narrowed her eyes when Sasha bent down to whisper in Lauren's ear; she was surprised that the two girls were working together. They had gotten along since Kelly came to the gym, but they had never been the best of friends. She would have to ask Kelly about this later.

Lauren made her way to the office slowly, like she was afraid of what would happen when she got there. Payson stepped aside and let her teammate pass into the office and then turned to face her betrayer.

"You're not going to hit me, are you? Because I saw the way you went at Sasha, and I'm a little scared of you now." It was unclear if Lauren was joking, and the idea that she might really be scared pleased Payson. She was used to people being intimidated by her, but she'd never had anyone be scared of her before.

"If I was going to hit you it would be somewhere with no witnesses."She intentionally made her tone ambiguous. Leaving Lauren with a healthy dose of fear could be beneficial.

"I'm so sorry, Payson. I am. Can you please forgive me?" Lauren asked, tears forming in her eyes again.

"No, I can't." She paused for effect. "At least not yet. I've watched Kaylie forgive you over and over again, and you never change. You have to earn my forgiveness."

Lauren wiped her cheeks with the back of her hand. "Okay, I can do that. What do you want me to do?"

This was the hard part. This was what she had spent the last several minutes thinking about, how to hold her accountable like Sasha said. "Words aren't enough, I need actions. Sasha thinks that you can be a better person, so…prove it. No more lying, no more manipulating people. If you're upset about something, then you have to be honest about it. Do you have any idea how much easier things would have been if you had just _told_ Sasha that you were uncomfortable with him dating Summer? If you had just told him that you thought he was spending too much time with me? He cares about you, Lauren, he would have done whatever it took to fix things."

"I could do that?" Lauren asked, managing to look puzzled and upset at the same time. "I mean, he wouldn't be pissed if I said something like that to him?"

Payson couldn't believe that Lauren thought she would get in trouble for being honest with Sasha. Geez, no wonder she was always manipulating people; she had no concept of what a normal relationship should be like. "No, he wouldn't be mad, but even if he was, what would be so bad about that? He's human; he makes mistakes and you have to call him on his crap. Haven't you ever noticed how often Sasha and I fight out on the floor? I piss him off nearly every day, but in the end we hash it out and come to an agreement because that's what normal people do. Just try being honest with everybody and you'll see how much better things are that way."

Lauren took a deep breath and let it out slowly. "Okay, so be honest. It all boils down to being honest. That's what I have to do for you to forgive me?"

"That's part of it," Payson said, chewing on her bottom lip. Lauren wasn't going to like what she had to say. "You've said you would change before and it never works, so… you have to get help. Like, professional help."

"A shrink?" Lauren's pitch rose sharply and broke with the question. "You want me to see a shrink?"

Payson had expected the resistance, so she squared her shoulders and looked Lauren straight in the eye. "That's the deal, Lauren. If you get help and work on getting better, then I'll work on forgiving you. If not, then we're over. This is your last shot, so think about it, and when you make a decision we'll see where we go from there."

Payson gave her ultimatum and left the office, leaving Lauren alone to think. On her way out, she jerked her head at Sasha, knowing that he would understand her message and go talk to Lauren. Until Lauren made a decision, Payson would do the one thing in the world that brought her the most comfort: gymnastics.

* * *

><p>AN: This was supposed to be a lot more Lauren-y, but it turned out mostly Payson/Sasha-y. Part of that was because I can't write Lauren for crap, but honestly, Sasha and Payson just wanted this chapter to be about them. I didn't plan for them to fight, either, it just happened.

Thank you all for your lovely reviews (and please keep them coming!) I wish I could respond to everyone, but sadly I can only reply to people who have an account. So if you left a review and don't have an account, just know how much I appreciate you :) And Laura—I know I promised you Cat and Mouse and didn't do it, so I'll try my hardest to do that tomorrow.


	7. Chapter 7

Disclaimer: I don't own MIOBI. I wish I did, but I don't.

A/N: I don't know why I think the Keeler's are Catholic. Maybe I've heard that somewhere, or maybe it's just that Kim Keeler reminds me of a friend who was quietly, devoutly Catholic all her life and was of the best people I've ever known.

* * *

><p>Steve was exhausted. It was three in the morning; all he wanted to do was crawl into bed and sleep through Sunday. He'd been working non-stop on Kelly's case, determined to get her free from her mother's poison as quickly as possible. So far, things had gone better than expected. Kim had given him a heads up that James Jansen might be sympathetic to Kelly's situation, and she had been right. It took a little convincing, because he was reluctant to take on two new clients at once, but he had agreed in the end. As far as Steve could tell, Jansen wasn't out for money, so he wasn't going to take advantage of Kelly's situation. Then Mark had agreed to the job of getting KPE in order before a permanent CEO could be found from within the company. It wasn't going to be an easy job; Sheila had ripped the company to shreds. Just getting everything in order to transfer control to Mark had been a nightmare, which is why Steve was currently dragging himself home in the middle of the night.<p>

Before he went to bed, Steve wanted to check on Lauren. Dealing with Kelly's mom had left him feeling very protective of his daughter, and he had slipped into her room every night since to make sure she was okay. Last night he sat for hours just watching her sleep. He couldn't imagine his life without her. There was a time when he couldn't imagine his life without Leslie, either, and he still sometimes woke reaching for her. He didn't ever want to lose Lauren like that.

Light was pouring from beneath the door to Lauren's room. He wasn't sure if she was awake or if she'd fallen asleep with the light on. He knocked on her doorframe, loud enough to be heard but not loud enough to wake her if she was sleeping.

"Come in," she said. Her voice was small and she sounded as if she was crying.

When he cracked the door he saw that she was, in fact, crying. She was sitting on her bed with a photo album opened on her lap, flipping through pages as tears streamed down her face. She put it away when he entered the room. Concerned, he moved to sit on the bed beside her and put his arm around her shoulder. "What's wrong, sweetheart? What happened?"

Her eyes were watery when she looked up at him, turning them into deep pools of blue. "I told Payson today. About sending the video to Ms. Beals."

"Sweetie, I know that was hard for you, but am so proud," he said, wiping tears from her cheeks. She had done what he was often incapable of doing, owning up to her mistakes. "That was a very brave thing to do."

Lauren sniffed hard. "Did I ruin everything, Daddy?"

Steve didn't know what to say. He wanted to say no, that she didn't ruin anything at all, but he couldn't. He had made too many mistakes in his life not to know what the consequences could be. He settled for a hopeful truth. "Payson's a good friend, Lauren. Just give her time."

"She said that I had to earn her forgiveness, but I don't know if I can. What if I'm just too much like _her_?"

"Too much like who?" he asked, positioning himself to look directly into his daughter's eyes. Something inside told him that this was very important. "Who do you think you're like?"

"Mom!" she cried. He was horrified to see how desperate she was feeling. "All she ever did was hurt people, over and over again. She was stupid, and selfish, and she didn't care about anyone else _and I'm just like her_."

Her voice rose with each word until she was screaming, and Steve felt himself pulling back from her out of instinct. Her words hit him like a wrecking ball to the chest. He had no idea that Lauren saw herself that way. Concern for his daughter made him overcome his shock quickly, and he reached forward to pull her into his chest. "Listen to me, Lauren, your mom wasn't like that and neither are you. Mom made mistakes, but there were so many good things about her that I see in you every day. I think that maybe _I_ made a mistake by not telling you more about her. I let my anger get in the way of giving you what you needed."

She was sobbing into his chest, and he let her cry until she was too exhausted to continue. He should have talked to Lauren about her mom a long time ago, but it was still so painful for him. He had never stopped loving Leslie, and that made the hurt and resentment so much stronger. For a long time it had hurt just to look at Lauren, because there was so much of her mom in her.

When Lauren quieted down, he asked, "Tell me all about it, sweetheart. What did Payson say?"

She looked up at him from where her head rested on his shoulder. Her eyelashes were glistening with tears, her face was wet and her nose was runny, and her voice was stuffy from crying. Steve thought she was the saddest and most beautiful thing he had ever seen. "She said that she should have expected that it was me, because I always hurt everybody, and that I never change." She hiccupped and took a deep breath. "How many times did mom do that to us? How many times did she swear she would change and then a week later she was gone? I don't want to be like her, Daddy."

"Mommy did change, Lauren, she got better. She got better for you, because she wanted to be with you. I should have let her see you, sweetie, so that you would understand. I'm so sorry that I took that away from you." It was hard to accept that he had made a mistake by keeping Leslie away from their daughter, but he knew it was true.

She pulled away from him and sat cross legged in front of him, looking nervous and ready to cry again. "Payson said she wouldn't forgive me unless I changed. She said that she wanted me to go to a psychiatrist."

Taken aback, Steve could only stare at her; tears overflowed from her eyes under his scrutiny. He didn't know what to do and he was too surprised to think clearly. He finally shook himself out of his stupor and said, "What do you want, sweetie? Do you want to go?"

"No. Yes. I don't know." She cast her eyes down. "I just don't want to be like her. I don't want to keep hurting them like she hurt me."

Steve had a sudden insight. How she sounded, the way that she wouldn't look at him—she was ashamed. She thought there was something wrong with needing help, and it was his fault that she felt that way. He taught her to always fend for herself because he didn't want her to get hurt again, but she ended up hurt anyway.

He leaned over so that his face was within her line of sight. "Did you know that I saw a psychiatrist after your mom left? I thought that maybe it was my fault that Mom got sick, because I was the one giving her the pills when she first got hurt. He helped me accept that I wasn't responsible for what happened. And Kaylie is seeing a psychiatrist now to help her get better. There is nothing embarrassing or shameful about asking for help."

"You saw a shrink? Why didn't I know about it?" She looked like she was moving away from shame and toward acceptance.

"You were really young. You were six when she was in the car accident and eight the first time she left. You didn't understand what was happening._ I_ didn't understand what was happening. I didn't understand why she couldn't just stop taking the pills." His voice broke, years of pent up emotion overtaking him. "I needed someone to talk to, and if I'd been a better father I would have realized that you needed someone to talk to, too. I shouldn't have made you handle this on your own."

Lauren hugged him, hard, and said, "You're wrong. You were the _best_ father."

When she released him, he asked her again, "Do you want this, Lauren? Do you want to talk to someone?" She bit her lip and nodded. "Okay. Monday morning I'll start making some calls and we'll find someone you feel comfortable with. For now, though… do you want to hear about your mom? We've never really talked about her, but I want you to know the Leslie that I fell in love with, the one who was so crazy about you. Do you want to hear?"

Lauren nodded again. "I… I have some pictures. I found them in your closet, a long time ago. Will you tell me about them?"

She reached for the picture album that she was looking at earlier. Steve recognized it. It was from early in their marriage, when Leslie had been a vibrant young woman who was so excited about having a little girl, before they even knew something called OxyContin existed. Together, Steve and Lauren leaned against the headboard and opened to the first page. For hours Steve told stories about the pictures, about the wonderful woman that his wife had been. The sun was already rising when Lauren finally fell asleep with her head resting on his shoulder. She was smiling.

* * *

><p>"Keeler, it's six in the morning on our only day off. Why in the name of all that's holy are you up?"<p>

Payson just chuckled. "We get up at four thirty every other day of the week. This is sleeping in for us."

Obviously Kelly didn't agree. She threw a pillow at Payson's head. "I have to sleep until at least eight before I'll consider it sleeping in. What is so important that it can't wait for another two hours?"

"I'm going running," she said, illustrating the point by tying her sneakers. "Wanna come?"

Kelly rolled her eyes. "I want to come when this magically becomes _not_ six a.m."

Payson's phone buzzed on the nightstand. Her hands were busy taming her long curly hair into a ponytail, so she asked Kelly to get it. Kelly grumbled under her breath but picked up the phone anyway. "You have a text from Sasha. He says 'Chautauqua Park or Devil's Hill?' Is he going with you?"

"Yeah," Payson said, walking into her closet to get her favorite hoodie. She called back over her shoulder, "Tell him Chautauqua Park. I'm not really in the mood to run uphill today."

When she came back out, Kelly was sitting up in bed (finally) and inspecting the iPhone in her hand with a flat expression. She didn't bother to look up from the phone as she asked, "Payson, are you lying to me or are you really that far up the river?"

"Um, no. To both. I'm not lying to you about anything and I don't even know what 'up the river' means." She couldn't think of anything on her phone that would cause Kelly to think she was lying about something.

"Denial, Payson. It means denial. I'm going to ignore how lame you are for not understanding that and jump to the part where you are either lying or in denial. This," she said, holding up the phone, "is not okay. So I'm going to ask this as straight forward as I can, and I want the truth. Are you and Sasha in a romantic relationship?"

Payson furrowed her eyebrows in confusion. "Kelly, we talked about this already. We're just friends. We're going running together, it's not a big deal."

Kelly was looking at her like she was insane, which was annoying as hell. She was the one spurting off nonsense about a romantic relationship. When she spoke, her voice was small and defeated. "Oh, God. You really are in denial. You don't even know what I'm talking about, do you?"

"No, I don't, and I would appreciate it if you would tell me so I can leave." Running with Sasha on Sunday mornings was part of her routine, and it was a release which she badly needed. There had been too much stress lately, and she needed the comfort of repetitive motion and Sasha's presence to get her calm back.

"Payson, you've got yourself dug so deep that I don't know if there's a way out." As ominous as her words were, her tone was worse. She was worried, and Kelly Parker did not worry about other people. "This is from two nights ago. 'I miss hearing your voice tonight.' That is not something that friends say to each other, Pay. Don't you get how inappropriate that is?"

She was sick of that word, inappropriate. She sank down on the bed and hugged a pillow to her chest. "I thought you said you were okay with this. You knew how it was between us. You just have to look at things through the right window. As a coach and athlete, no, that's not appropriate and we know it. But just for _us_, for our friendship, that's normal. I did miss hearing his voice. We talk almost every single night, so when we don't talk it's like something is missing from the day. Like we've forgotten the last puzzle piece."

"Okay, I'm not judging," Kelly said, holding up her hands like she was surrendering. "I really am okay with this….friendship, or whatever. But I'm really concerned here. I think you've fooled yourself into believing this is less than it is, and it could all blow up in your face. If someone stole your phone, these text messages could get you thrown off the national team and Sasha thrown out of the sport."

Payson wanted to tell Kelly that she was wrong, but she couldn't bring herself to do it. There was a tiny niggling suspicion in the back of Payson's mind that maybe there was something else going on here. She knew that there was nothing romantic between her and Sasha—she loved Max and Sasha certainly didn't feel that way about her—but maybe she was letting her attraction spill over into their friendship. Maybe the reason she wanted to hear his voice every night wasn't because it was part of her routine but because his voice sent tingles down her spine. Maybe the reason that they always seemed to be too close together was because her body naturally leaned toward his. She had to get this attraction in check or it was going to mess up everything.

"Okay. I get your point, and I'll be more careful. I'll talk to Sasha; we'll try to be as normal as possible from now on."

Kelly's response was a raised eyebrow. "Somehow I seriously doubt that you get my point. I'm going through here and deleting everything that could get you kicked of the national team, okay? And have Sasha do the same."

She started scrolling up through the past messages and deleting nearly half of them. Some she read out loud. "_When do you get home? I miss you so much; Today was horrible. I wish you were here holding me_—Really, Payson? In what world is it okay for you to say that?; _I'm watching you on Conan right now. You look gorgeous_; Oh, look, this one's from Rio—_Meet me on the roof in 15 minutes_. Do you realize what that sounds like? If I had seen this back then I would have automatically assumed that you were meeting for a hook up."

Payson's cheeks were burning. Kelly was right, she had never thought about how that stuff would sound to someone on the outside. Taken out of context it sounded really bad. "Okay, thanks for making it sound like Sasha and I are having sex. That wasn't embarrassing _at all_. Can I go now?" Sarcasm probably wasn't the best way to handle Kelly's concern, but it was the only thing she could manage at the moment.

"I'm thinking that the fact that you're still going running with him proves my point about denial, but whatever. Go, and don't wake me up when you get back."

* * *

><p>As they ran, Payson told Sasha about her conversation with Kelly. They talked about it for a while and agreed that Kelly was right. They needed to be more careful. Together they made a plan to avoid any future misconceptions, or, rather, revised the plan they already had in place.<p>

When he came back from Romania, the two of them had sat down and had a long conversation about the nature of their relationship and how they would handle outside criticism. They put limits on the time he spent with her in the gym, and made sure to keep all familiarity out of their interactions when they were around other people. They had their time in the mornings and evenings while the gym was empty, their Sunday morning runs, and their nightly phone calls. Outside of that, they were completely professional. Now they would add the precautions of deleting their texts and call histories and having a ready excuse if they ran into anyone they knew on Sundays.

Once they exhausted that subject, they moved on to more mundane topics. Through unspoken agreement they avoided the subject of Kelly's new living situation. It was the elephant in the room, and both needed to pretend like it wasn't there for a couple of hours. Instead they talked about how excited Becca was about her elite training, and how Austin and Sasha were having what Payson called 'boy-bonding nights.'

"Payson, just because you use the term girl-bonding does not mean that it is okay to say boy-bonding. That implies something completely different."

"It only means something different if you make it mean something different. You're boys and you're bonding. The term fits." Honestly, she was just saying it to annoy him. It was fun to watch him get tetchy.

He turned to grin at her. "I'm not sure the term _boy_ fits either of us. I'm thirty and Austin's twenty three. I think we both gave up the title 'boy' a long time ago." Payson opened her mouth to respond, but he cut her off. "And if you say man-bonding I am throwing you in the creek."

"Fine," she pouted. "What about bromance?"

"No."

"Spoil sport." There was a long pause where the only sound was their feet hitting the ground. "You know, I've guess I've never really thought about it before, but Austin's six years older than Kaylie."

"So what? I'm thirteen years older than you." Payson inhaled sharply and looked at Sasha through the corner of her eye. His cheeks were covered by a light blush. "That didn't come out right."

She laughed, actually relieved to hear him say something like that. "It's okay. I'm glad you said it. Now we're 2 to 1 on saying awkward things, which is a lot better than 2 to zilch. I don't think my mouth and my head were connected yesterday."

"Apparently mine aren't connected today," he said.

"Okay, how about this," she offered, "A complete and total subject change. We'll just forget all the stupid things we said this weekend and move on."

Sasha laughed, and the sound left her tingling. "Sounds like a plan. Did you have a new subject in mind?"

"Actually, I did," she said, grinning. She had been bursting to tell him this all morning. "You remember me telling you about my cousin Liz?"

"Yeah, she's the one you used to do gymnastics with, right? You said the two of you were joined at the hip before you moved down here." She was proud of him for remembering. They had only talked about her a couple of times.

"That's the one. I talked to her yesterday and she might be coming to CU Boulder next fall. I'm so excited. We haven't spent more than a week together since we were twelve, and now she might be here all the time. I even thought that maybe me, her, and Kelly could all get an apartment together."

"That's fantastic, Payson. I know how much you miss your dad's family." Payson snorted and Sasha got adorably confused. "What?"

"Nothing. I just think it's funny how you said I miss _Dad's_ family." Payson loved her relatives on her dad's side. The relatives on her mom's side she mostly just tolerated. "I love how you picked up that I'm not particularly fond of Mom's family."

"Yeah, well, I gather your mum's not particularly fond of them, either. I can relate." She didn't need to look at him to know that he was rolling his eyes.

Payson looked at her watch. "We should probably head back now or I'll miss Mass, which bugs the hell out of mom."

Sasha snickered. "Leave it to you to swear while talking about church."

"Shut up." She shoved him hard and then took off sprinting, racing him to the park entrance where they would go their separate ways.

* * *

><p>"That was… different."<p>

Payson just laughed. "Seriously, Kelly, you don't have to come to Mass with us if you don't want to. My mom is not Summer. She's not going to force her beliefs down your throat."

Kelly put on her best Queen Bitch expression. "Please, Keeler, like I would let anyone force me to do something I don't want to do." They both ignored the blatant untruth of that statement. If it was easier for Kelly to keep up the front, Payson wasn't going to push her. "Besides, I didn't say it was bad, I said it was different. My mom worships money, so I'd say this is a step up. It's just… mostly I had no idea what was going on."

"Yeah, that's pretty typical," Payson said, laughing again. "It takes a while to get used to the liturgy. But it really is up to you if you want to go. You're welcome to come and you're welcome to stay home, whichever you want."

"Okay, I get it Payson, you're not Summer. You've made your point. What I don't get is why she bothers you so much. I mean, she annoys everybody, but you seem to really hate her. Why?"

Payson pulled her shirt over her head before she answered. They were changing out of their dress clothes for whatever family day activity her mom had planned for the day. "Did you know that she used to date Sasha?"

"Uh, no," Kelly said, straightening up from pulling on her boots. "But that explains why you hate her."

Payson glared at her, knowing exactly what her friend was implying. "I do not hate her because she dated Sasha, because I do not have feelings for him. We are _friends_."

"When you realize you're wrong, I'm going to say I told you so."

"I'm not wrong." Mostly. She starting to accept that she might have the slightest amount of feelings for him, but not enough to matter, and certainly not enough to tell Kelly, who would only gloat. "I hate her because of _how_ she dated Sasha. She tried to force her beliefs on him, but she didn't have any respect at all for his beliefs, and she made a big deal out of keeping it secret and then told Lauren, and then she left and started dating Steve Tanner again without even having the guts to actually break up with him. What kind of person does that?"

While Payson ranted, Kelly dropped the hanger she was holding and stared with her mouth hanging open. She managed to close her mouth and said, "How the hell do you know all that? There is no way he just sat around one day and told you all about his ex-girlfriend, he's not that kind of guy."

"I pieced together most of it," she answered with a shrug, "and asked him about the rest. You're right, he's not going to sit around and bitch about his ex, but he'll answer my questions no matter how awkward it is. He's always honest with me." It was one of the things she loved—no, _liked_—about him. He told her everything she wanted to know, even if he was incredibly uncomfortable with the subject.

Kelly just shook her head and finished hanging up her dress. "I can't believe you really think this is platonic. Anyway, what's on the agenda for today? You have me all hyped up about family day." There was a little bit of sarcasm in the statement, but mostly there was excitement. Kelly had flashed what Payson was secretly calling her conquer-the-world-smile when she heard about the Keeler family day tradition.

"Don't get your hopes up too high, Kel. It's usually something lame, like an art fair." She was worried that Kelly was expecting something more than she was going to get. "Actually, why don't you go ahead and ask mom what we're doing while I make a call."

Payson couldn't interpret the look Kelly was giving her. "Are you calling Sasha?"

"No," she said, rolling her eyes. Kelly was putting way too much emphasis on her relationship with Sasha. "I'm calling Nastia. Yesterday was her birthday and I forgot. Now go talk to mom and see what ridiculous thing she has planned for us today."

She ushered Kelly out of the room and then turned to her dresser. She pulled a small card out of her top drawer and considered it. It was an invitation to Nasita's birthday party, or what was jokingly called the-week-after-Nastia's-birthday-party. She was born at an extremely inconvenient time for a gymnast, so close to Worlds, and never had time to throw a party until the week following her birthday. Even now that she was no longer competing, she was still heavily involved with the NGO and had been busy with pre- and post-Worlds business.

Payson was the only Rock girl who was invited. She and Nastia always got along well, because they were very similar people, but Sasha had put them in closer contact during the early stages of her comeback. Nastia had helped a lot in Payson's transition to an artistic gymnast, and the two girls had moved from acquaintances to friends. Kaylie, Lauren, and Kelly still fell firmly into the acquaintance category.

She hadn't planned to attend, because she felt that it would be awkward to leave the other girls behind, but considering the past week it might be a good idea to get away from the Rock for a while. She picked up her phone and dialed Nastia's number. It rang twice before Nastia picked up, "Hello?"

"Hey, Nastia, it's Payson. I know I'm late on this, but I wanted to tell you happy birthday."

Laugher rang through the phone. "Thanks! No worries about being late, though, because Alicia just called me, too. Are you coming next weekend?"

"Actually, I wanted to ask you about that… would it be okay if I brought a guest?" Payson was a little sheepish about asking, but it was necessary.

"Oh ho, I heard you had a boyfriend now."

"No!" she denied quickly, but then blushed and corrected herself. "Well, yes, I do, but that's not who I wanted to bring. Kelly Parker just moved in with us so that she can train at the Rock, and don't want to just up and leave her here while everything is so new. I thought that if you didn't mind, she could just come with me and avoid the problem."

There was only the briefest pause of confusion before Nastia spoke. "Yeah, sure. I'd be glad to see her. I just can't believe the _she's_ moving in with _you_."

"I know, right? Who would have ever thought that Kelly Parker and I would be friends? I guess you can only hate someone for so long before you run out of steam."

Nastia laughed again. "I guess so. I'm glad, though. You'll be a better team for 2012 if the two of you are getting along. So I can count you and her both in for the party?"

"Well, I'll have to talk to Sasha and make sure that he won't flip a lid if we miss training. I'm pretty sure he'll agree though, because he loves you." It was true. Nastia was his kind of gymnast: artistic, a fierce competitor, and completely in love with the sport.

"Well, tell me if he says no and I'll get my dad to work on him," she teased, knowing as well as Payson did that Sasha still held a bit of hero-worship for Valeri the way that Payson did for Carly Patterson. He had looked up to Valeri Liukin and Vladimir Artemov like gods when he was a little boy.

"Okay," Payson said, chuckling. "I'll talk to him tomorrow and text you with his answer."

After they said goodbye and hung up, Payson made her way into the kitchen where the rest of her family was gathered. Kelly had gotten hung up with Becca, and they were sitting at the table hunched over a magazine. Payson smiled at the scene. Becca had been reluctant to accept Kelly into the family, still hanging on the days when Kelly was the enemy, but they had slowly been bonding. Glancing over their shoulders, she saw that they were taking a quiz, _How Dateable are You?_

"I can answer that question for you, guys. You are completely undateable, because Sasha would kill you both."

Becca stuck her tongue out, a typical thirteen year old. "_You_ have a boyfriend, and you're not dead."

Payson had nothing to say in reply, because Becca was completely right. The no dating rule had pretty much gone by the wayside since Austin and Kaylie went public, because Sasha was not willing to put an end to something that made Kaylie so happy. "Okay, fine, Sasha might not kill you. So how dateable are you?"

"Apparently Becca is very dateable," Kelly answered. "Me, not so much. It says I am too controlling."

"You, controlling? Never!" All three girls laughed at Payson's joke, which attracted Kim's attention.

"Okay, you three, get your noses out of that magazine and get over here. You, too, Mark. No working on Sunday." Her words had an effect that she probably hadn't intended. The girls stopped giggling and turned to look at Mark, who was sitting at the counter with several files opened before him. They all knew what he was working on. Late last night, Steve had dropped off several large Bankers boxes full of KPE files for Mark to start going through. He'd been up late trying to sort out the mess that Sheila had made of the company.

Kelly winced slightly and asked, "How bad is it?"

Payson recognized the look on her dad's face, but Kelly would not. He was debating whether or not to tell the whole truth. "It's pretty bad, but not so bad that it can't be fixed."

"So it's definitely true, what Mr. Tanner said?" she asked, biting her lip. "About my mom stealing money from me?"

Mark nodded. "Yeah, it's true."

"Okay," Payson said, noticing how uncomfortable Kelly was with the topic. "I'm just gonna be upfront here and point out that there is no possible way to end this discussion or change the subject that won't seem forced, so I say we just go ahead and force it. Mom, what are we doing today?" Kelly sent her a small smile.

Kim accepted the conversation change gracefully, saying, "We're baking. The high school band is having a bake sale to raise money to get to the Tournament of the Roses Parade over the break, and Mrs. Gibson asked if I would donate a thing or two."

"Or ten," Payson quipped. Then she turned to Kelly and explained, "Mrs. Gibson is our next door neighbor, and her son plays saxophone in the band. They had a bake sale last year and mom donated three cakes, five dozen cookies, and two dozen cupcakes. She has a tendency to go overboard."

Kim flicked some flour in her daughter's direction playfully. "Be nice. It's for a good cause. Now," she said, addressing Kelly, "have you ever baked before?"

Kelly shook her head no. "I'd actually never been inside a kitchen before I came here. We had a cook."

"I wish we had a cook," Becca said, leaning against the kitchen island with a sigh.

"No you don't," Kelly answered, "Your mom's food is way better. It actually has _taste_."

Sensing that there was more to that statement, which Kelly likely did not want to discuss, Payson seamlessly moved the conversation to a safer area. "Well, baking isn't that hard. We'll teach you, and you'll be a pro in no time."

The girls started mixing batter while Kim made icing and Mark prepared cookie sheets, cupcake trays, and cake pans. They made the cakes first. Becca offered to teach Kelly, which Payson took as a good sign regarding their relationship. They all talked and laughed as they worked, with a few unexpected interruptions coming in the form of an impromptu flour fight between Kim and Mark and the surprise splatter of ingredients when Kelly turned on the mixer too fast. Through it all, Phoebe 'helped' by running back and forth and licking people's ankles.

Kelly watched the adult Keelers with a mixture of shock and awe. Payson and Becca had both figured out long ago that the relationship between their parents was of a rare kind. The flour fight was a prime example. They could act like kids together, like they were still teenagers in love instead of a couple that had been married for seventeen years. And then there was the fact that they had no qualms about PDA, hugging and kissing in front on their children with no embarrassment or awkwardness. Unlike any of her friends, Payson had a great example of what a healthy marriage was supposed to look like, and it took her a long time to realize how lucky she was.

After a few hours, the table was full of baked goods, with a batch of chocolate chip cookies still in the oven and one waiting to go in. They had baked everything that needed to be decorated first so that they had plenty of time to cool before the girls attacked them with icing. Payson readied the first layer of the chocolate cake on the cardboard platter it would be carried on and dug out all of her decorating tools from the drawer.

Becca turned to Kelly with a serious expression. "You are about to witness something that nobody outside this room has ever seen. Are you ready for that responsibility?"

Kelly eyed her suspiciously. "What the hell are you talking about?"

"Don't say hell."

"Yes, ma'am." Those were two words that Payson never expect to hear from Kelly, much less with the sincerity she spoke them with. Kim Keeler had an uncanny ability to draw people's respect.

Becca ignored the exchange. "Payson has a secret talent," she said, her eyes now twinkling. "She has mad cake decorating skills."

Kelly laughed and looked as Payson, saying, "This is a joke, right? You're a gymnast, you can't eat this stuff, so why would you be able to decorate it?"

"It's not a joke. I can decorate cakes, cookies, cupcakes, any of it. Dad's mom owned a bakery, so we used to do this together when I was a kid. I got pretty good at it."

"By good at it," Becca clarified, "she means awesome. Last year she made a cake that looked like a castle. It sold for some gigantic sum of money. What are you going to do this year, Pay?"

"Nothing so extravagant. They're going to the Tournament of Roses, so I thought I'd do a cake with flowers on it. Why don't you show Kelly how to do the normal decorating stuff while I work on this?" She was blatantly throwing the two girls together as much as possible, letting them get to know each other better. Kelly was family now, so she needed to be close with Becca.

The family continued to chat as they decorated the deserts, but with Payson contributing a lot less to the conversation. Fondant was harder to work with than normal icing, so she needed most of her concentration on the cake. Across the table, Kelly and Becca were doing a decent job of decorating the remaining cakes, Kim was expertly decorating some sugar cookies, and Mark was proving that he inherited none of his mother's skill as he _attempted_ to ice the cupcakes. When they were done, the whole family stepped back to admire their work.

"Wow," Kelly said, appraising Payson's cake. "I was really impressed with myself until I looked at yours."

Payson waved off the comment. "I've been doing this since I was six. Yours is amazing for a first effort."

Grinning sheepishly, Kelly said, "Becca may have helped a little. Or a lot."

"Okay," said Kim, rubbing her hands together. "Everybody have a cookie and then we'll get this mess cleaned up."

"You mean you actually _eat_ this?"

Payson smiled at her. "Relax, Kel. One cookie is not going to destroy your body. Baking is not something we do very often, for obvious reasons, so it's a special occasion when we do. Let's celebrate our awesome work."

Once they talked Kelly into indulging in the treat, the three girls did something very silly that elicited an 'aww' from the adults: they toasted their chocolate chip cookies with a slight modification of Payson's words, suggested by Becca. "To our awesomeness!"

* * *

><p>While Kim and Mark cleaned up the effects of the first clean up (Payson <em>may<em> have thrown a soapy towel at Becca, which _may_ have incited an all out soap war), the three teenagers hung out in Payson and Kelly's room. Too lazy to go to her own room and change, Becca was wearing a pair of Payson's sweatpants and one of Kelly's Denver Elite t-shirts. It was kind of fun dressing up in their clothes, even it if was just workout attire. She could pretend like she was an awesome gymnast like they were.

Shamelessly poking around their stuff, she picked up the book that was sitting on top of the dresser and read the title. "_The Scarlet Pimpernel_. Is this yours, Kelly? I've never heard of it."

"Yeah, it is. It's my favorite book. My dad used to read it to me when I was a kid."

"What's it about?" It looked like a pretty big book to read to a little kid. Her dad used to read her Stuart Little, and it was a lot smaller.

Kelly's eyes lit up as she described the book. "It's about this hero who rescues people during the French Revolution, but nobody knows who he is, and the Revolutionaries are trying to capture him. It's like Zorro, but better."

"That sounds kind of cool. Can I read it sometime?" This sounded adventure-y, and that was the kind of book that Becca liked to read. She didn't understand why Payson liked _Romeo and Juliet_ so much; it was so sappy.

"Yeah, sure," Kelly said. "Just don't drop it in the bathtub or anything. I don't have a lot of stuff from my dad, so it's kinda special."

It was really nice of Kelly to let her read her special book, but Becca thought that maybe she should just check it out at the library. It obviously meant a lot to Kelly, and she didn't want to ruin it on accident.

"Not to be nosy," Payson stated, but then stopped and said, "Actually, never mind that, I'm being completely nosy. Is the tiger from your dad, too? I've just been wondering, because the other stuff you brought with you…"

Becca didn't know what 'other stuff' Payson was talking about, but she spotted the tiger pretty easily. The black and orange stuffed animal stood out against Payson light blue comforter, lying on the side where Kelly slept.

"No, actually, it's from my mom." She sat down on the bed and picked up the toy. "It was a birthday present, when I was six, because whenever she took me to the zoo the only animals I cared about were the tigers. I slept with this thing for years."

"You still sleep with it, Kel," Payson pointed out. "It hasn't left our bed since you got here."

"Good point," Kelly said, laughing, although her voice sounded tight and her eyes were watery. "I guess it just reminds me that she wasn't always a shitty mom, you know?"

Becca couldn't stand it any longer. She knew Kelly wasn't big on hugs, but sometimes you just needed one. She sat down on the bed and slid her arms around Kelly's waist, and was surprised when the older girl relaxed into the embrace. Seriously, sometimes you just need a hug.

"Hey, I've got an idea. Becca would probably destroy your book if you lent it to her, so why don't we read it together?" Payson always knew the right thing to say. Kelly said _The Scarlet Pimpernel_ was her favorite book, so it was sure to cheer her up.

Kelly pulled out of the hug and smiled. "That sounds great." She stood up to get the book and Becca scooted to the center of the bed, where Payson joined her. Kelly climbed back into the bed, settled onto other side, and wound her arm around Becca's shoulder. Becca felt like a kid again, snuggled between her parents to read a bedtime story, except this time she was snuggled between Payson and Kelly, which was infinitely cooler.

With the three of them curled together, Kelly opened to the first page and began to read, "A surging, seething, murmuring crowd of beings that are human only in name…"

* * *

><p>AN: I was trying to get this up by Monday, but obviously that did not work :( It just wasn't working last weekend, and then when it did start working I was back in school and dealing with the craziness that accompanies the last semester of grad school. I've worked on it every day this week, but I never had any consistent time to sit down and write until now. I hope you can forgive me!

I moved Worlds up to one week earlier in October to fit in Nastia's birthday, and I felt guilty about that for about 10 minutes until I thought about how messed up the shows timeline is. Seriously, I'm re-watching it all and one episode it's July and then all of a sudden it's Valentine's Day. WTF?

On a side note, I just realized today that Summer is going to get her heart ripped out and stomped on in this story, and I swear it has nothing to do with me hating her. I do hate her—I think she is a closed-minded, condescending, and hypocritical character who turns the faith of millions into a punch line—but that has nothing to do with what happens to her here. Any guesses as to what happened in this chapter that suddenly made me realize I was going to smash Summer's heart?

P.S. Ayla Kell is an actual cake decorator, so I thought I'd make Payson one too, just for fun. There are pictures of their cakes linked in my profile.


	8. Chapter 8

Disclaimer: I don't own anything.

A/N: I know, I'm a horrible person and you all hate me. Hopefully you'll forgive me for the long delay when I explain what caused it. Read my note at the end.

Their beds were being delivered today, and Payson was pretty sure that Kelly was as relieved as she was. Neither minded sharing a bed for a little while, but it had been a week and they both needed space by now. Sleeping on a twin bed would be annoying, but it wasn't any different than what they would be experiencing if they were headed to college, and at least they would each have their own space.

They went shopping right after practice, and the back of Payson's SUV was packed full. They had to have new bedding, but more importantly they needed extra storage space. The contents of Kelly's old bedroom had been delivered the night before and the boxes were currently stacked ceiling high in their room, waiting to be unpacked. There weren't enough shelves in their room to accommodate all of Kelly's stuff, much less both of their belongings together.

"Dad," Payson called as they walked through the door. "I think we're going to need some help unloading the car. It might take us all day if we try to do this by ourselves." They were already loaded down with several large bags each and the car was still full. The two girls made their way back to the bedroom and stopped dead in their tracks when they walked through the door.

"I think this is going to take a lot of work," Kelly said, looking around at the mess in the room. The beds were set up, but the mattresses were still leaning up against the wall, and the old bed was lying around the floor in pieces.

Payson's very articulate answer was, "Uh, yeah."

Kelly evaluated the mess with a critical eye. "Okay, this is what we're going to do: let's move all of my boxes and all of your stuff into the hallway and Becca's room to get it out of the way. We'll set up all the furniture first and then bring in our stuff when that's done."

Kelly's level of organization was impressive. She didn't just move their stuff, she divided it into categorical piles. She had left strict instructions for how her room was to be packed up and labeled, so there was none of the chaos that normally accompanied moving, and she placed all of Payson's stuff on top of the correspondingly labeled boxes of her own. Additionally, she arranged the different piles so that what they needed first was closest to them and what would be placed last was farthest away from them, spilling over into Becca's room. She was bossing everybody around, but Payson found that she didn't mind because it was so helpful.

It took them well over an hour to assemble all of the new furniture, even with Becca and her parents helping. Once everything was put together they ran into another problem that required Kelly's skills—there wasn't enough wall space to put everything. Becca graciously volunteered to take their grandmother's dressing table, which she had always wanted, but Payson wasn't too happy with that idea. After about two minutes of bickering between the sisters, Kelly told everyone to get out of the room for five minutes and then come back. When they did she had figured out exactly where everything needed to go to make it fit, including the dressing table, to which Becca responded, "You suck."

Once the furniture was all up, the rest of the family left them alone to arrange their bedroom. Payson tended to be a controlling person, but she saw enough of Kelly's skills to allow her to stay in control of the arranging. They pulled in several boxes and Kelly started opening them. "Oh good," she said, "They actually packed my books the way I told them to. Do you mind if I mix your books in with mine?"

Payson looked up from where she was slicing open tape with a box cutter. "Yeah, sure, but why?"

"Because it will drive me _nuts_ if there are a few dozen books that aren't arranged the way I like them," she said, making an emphatic gesture with her arms. "Actually, they have been driving me nuts all week. There is no rhyme or reason to the order you have them in."

"Oh my God," Payson said, gleeful to have discovered something new about Kelly. "I thought you were just really organized, but you're actually obsessive-compulsive. Are you going to start washing your hands all the time and avoiding cracks in the sidewalk?" This was fantastic. She would have material to mock Kelly with for the rest of her life.

"I'm not OCD," she replied matter-of-factly. "Your compulsions have to take up at least an hour of everyday to be considered OCD. I just like things in an orderly manner."

Payson started giggling, and Kelly managed to send her a look that was both questioning and disdainful at the same time. She tamped down her laugher and said, "You know what it takes to get diagnosed with OCD? So that means you've either considered the possibility and looked it up or actually been evaluated for it already. Which one was it?"

Kelly tossed her head and said, "Neither. I read it in a magazine." Payson raised an eyebrow to express her doubt; Kelly's shoulders slumped out of her haughty pose and she said, "Okay, fine. I might have looked it up. I know I'm neurotic, but I'm really not obsessive-compulsive. I just like for things to be organized. Life is more efficient that way."

Payson just laughed again and Kelly threw a handful of packing peanuts at her. They had a short but furious packing peanut war, during which Payson learned that a foam peanut can really hurt if thrown hard enough, and then got back to work. Kelly instructed her on the correct way to shelve the books—by genre and sub-genre, arranged alphabetically by author and then by title amongst the same author's work—and she got to work unpacking the boxes onto the floor to ceiling bookshelves that now covered an entire wall. The books were already arranged in the correct order within the boxes, so all she was really doing was moving them. The two girls chatted while they worked, but she didn't really pay attention to what Kelly was doing until she finished shelving the books and turned for more instructions from Commandant Parker.

Kelly had arranged all of their trophies on the floating shelves they'd set up, and as Payson examined them she realized that they were in chronological order. She turned to see what Kelly was doing and saw her arranging medals on the mattress of one of the beds. The other bed already had several even rows of medals suspended from hooks on the wall behind it. Judging by the medals that Payson recognized off hand, they were in chronological order as well.

Kelly had stopped in her organizational efforts to examine one of the medals more closely, and Payson blushed when she saw what it was. This was going to be hard to explain. Kelly looked up with her brows furrowed and asked, "Why do you have one of Sasha's medals from Sydney?"

"He, uh, he gave it to me. Back when I was first making the transition to an artistic gymnast. I was having a hard time believing that I could do it, so he gave that to me until I won one of my own, to show how much he believed in me." It was one of the nicest things anyone had ever done for her, but she didn't share the story with many people because the rumors about her and Sasha were already so rampant. This would just be fodder for the gossip.

Kelly was frowning down at the medal in her hands. "Until you win one of your own. So, what, it's like a loan?"

"Not exactly," she said, unable to stop the smile that spread on her face when she thought about their deal. "Originally it was, but we changed it a little after Romania. I gave it back to him when we were there, said that I was too disappointed in him to look at it anymore. That's what convinced him to come back. So before I competed in Hungary, he gave it to me again and said that it was mine to keep, as a promise that he would never leave me again. We decided that since I had his All-Around gold, I had to win the All-Around and give him my medal. An even trade."

"That's…" Kelly said, trailing off. She started again. "I'm trying to think of something sarcastic to say here and I've got nothing. That's one of the—and I can't believe I'm using this word—_sweetest_ things I've ever heard."

Payson decided to give herself about a million accomplishment points for making Kelly Parker say something was sweet. She grinned and took the medal away from her friend and walked toward her dressing table. "Well, I'm sure you'll be back to your normal self again soon and have something snippy to say. But this one doesn't belong with the rest of them. It has a place of honor on my mirror."

She hung Sasha's medal in its place and then turned back to Kelly, who was starting to hang the other medals over Payson's bed. "So, what's with all this, anyway?" she asked, motioning to the room in general as evidence of Kelly's obsessive behavior. "Your old room wasn't like this."

"Oh yes it was," she said, laughing. "You just couldn't tell because it was more spread out. Each column of shelves represented a different year of competition for me, moving chronologically from left to right. I actually associate certain literary genres with different times in my life just because they shared the same shelf with that year's trophies and medals."

Payson laughed, too, and said, "Oh my gosh, you really are a freak." Kelly didn't have any packing peanuts within reach that time, so she chucked her shoe at Payson instead.

Unpacking the rest of their stuff went more quickly, because Kelly had no fanatical need to organize most of it. Payson was allowed to set out picture frames and nick-knacks with no particular pattern, and Kelly was actually okay with the hodgepodge of colors making up the room. All the furniture was white, but Payson's bed was covered with her signature purple and Kelly's with her signature navy blue, and the throw pillows littering both beds contributed at least five other colors. The room was one big jumble of their personalities and Payson loved it.

The last thing they unpacked was Kelly's clothes. They bought several stackable sets of drawers and cabinets to move some of their clothes into, because Payson's closet could never accommodate their combined wardrobes. She had a good-sized walk-in, but Kelly's old closet was as big as their entire room. Kelly got obsessive again when it came to clothes, insisting that they not only place her things in a certain way, but also rearrange Payson's clothes to fit her organizational criteria. Despite the fact that Payson made fun of her for it, she couldn't help but admit that the system made sense. She would never have to dig around for a particular shirt she wanted again.

She unzipped one of the bulky garment bags from Kelly's house to find several fancy dresses, the kind that they usually wore to competition receptions to meet with officials and sponsorship representatives. She couldn't help but let out a low whistle as she flipped through them. Her mom would never let her wear anything as risqué as most of these dresses.

Kelly came to look at what she was holding and groaned when she saw them. "God, I hate those things."

"So why do you have them?" Payson asked, confused.

"My mom made me wear them to meet with sponsors," she said, her expression sour. "She said it never hurt to show a little skin."

Payson was at a loss for words. Even knowing what a psychotic bitch Sheila Baboyan was, she still managed to be surprised by the things that Kelly was put through. "Oh my God. Kelly, I…" She halted, not knowing what she could possibly say to make this better.

"Forget about it," Kelly said with a hard glint in her eyes. "Let's just throw them away. Or better yet, let's burn them."

She studied her friend carefully, trying to judge the earnestness of her suggestion. She definitely wasn't joking, and burning those dresses might give her a sense of release from her past. It could be good for her. She nodded her head and said, "Get together everything you want to burn. I'll call Kaylie and Lauren."

A/N: So, the reason it's been two and a half weeks since I updated… My mind got hijacked by another story. I can't stop writing it. I kept trying to come back and finish this chapter to post, but every time I started my mind would go straight back to that other story. I've written 40,000 words in the last twelve days. That's roughly a 120 page book. So, since that story won't let go of my mind, I'm going to try to finish it up before I really dive back into MKB and C&M. Don't worry, though, I don't expect it to be more than a couple of weeks longer and then I'll be back to this story AND you'll have the new story to read. I can't judge for myself, but I've gotten really good responses from the few people who have read it, so I think you're going to like it.

If you left a review on one of my fics recently and never got a response from me, I'm really sorry. I haven't answered my emails since I started the new story. Or done my homework. Or slept. But I WILL get back to you eventually, I promise.

Also, for those of you who read The Life After early on when the break lines were missing, I just wanted to let you know that they are back and the story probably makes a lot more sense with them.


	9. Chapter 9

Disclaimer: If I owned MIOBI there would be one really big difference to Season 3.

A/N: Thanks to leyla1111 for giving me a kick in the rear to get working on this again :)

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><p>Payson had an overwhelming sense of déjà vu. Sitting in the backseat of Lauren's Hummer making the three hour trek to gymnastics camp was starting to become a tradition.<p>

Tonight would be the longest period of time she spent in direct contact with Lauren since she found out about the training cam video. She wasn't thrilled about it, but Kelly needed her team right now, all of them. Kelly and Lauren had formed some kind of bond over the last few days. Since Lauren confessed, the two girls trained together while Kaylie and Payson partnered up. There was a very small part of her that felt betrayed that Kelly, who had become her best friend, was staying loyal to Lauren, but the resentment was tempered by pride in Kelly's compassionate behavior.

Payson wasn't ready to train with Lauren again, and even Kaylie was having a hard time forgiving her this time, but Kelly maintained from the start that she wasn't taking sides. She said that Lauren needed a friend right now and since it couldn't be Payson and apparently wouldn't be Kaylie, she was the only one left for the job. They talked about it at home that first night, and Kelly explained that she related to the pain that Lauren was going through and wanted to give her a chance the way that the Rock girls had all given her a chance. "If you can forgive me after all that I've done," she'd said, "why can't you forgive Lauren? I know what she's going through because I've been through it myself, and the thing that helped me the most was that the three of you supported me despite all of the horrible things I've done."

Gymnastics camp was sacred ground for them, a place of bonding when the rest of the world was falling apart, so maybe it would be good for all of them. Kelly could face her demons and Kaylie and Payson could face Lauren.

Kelly broke a silence that had lasted for nearly twenty minutes. "You said this is a three hour drive, right?"

"Yeah, why?" Kaylie asked, sounding groggy. Payson suspected she had been dozing in her seat.

"I'm just wondering if we're ever going to get there with Lauren driving this slow."

Kaylie blinked several times to clear her eyes and then leaned to read the speedometer over the back of the seat. "Uh, she has a point, Lo. Why are we going sixty?"

"Because I don't want to get pulled over while there is a case full of Bacardi in the back of the car," Lauren said, seeming not to notice that she had said something odd.

All three girls started at Lauren for several seconds before Payson said, "Okay, I'll bite. Why do you have a case full of Bacardi?"

She was looking at the back of Lauren's head, but she could almost feel the eye roll in response to the question. "Duh, because it's flammable."

Kaylie glanced at Payson from the opposite side of the backseat. "Did that make sense to you? Because I'm completely lost."

"Have you ever tried to burn a dress before, Kaylie?" Lauren asked. "It's not as easy as you'd think. We need a catalyst, and gasoline or paint thinner are a little _too_ flammable. Rum will burn the dresses but not set us on fire."

Kaylie wiggled around so that her upper body was between the two front seats and she could see Lauren. "Are you saying that you _have_ burned a dress before?"

"Yes."

Payson let her curiosity get the better of her. "Two questions: what and why?"

It took Lauren a long time to answer. "It was the dress I wore that first night with Carter, and I did it for the same reason that we're doing this. It was therapeutic."

"Speaking of therapy," Kelly said, changing the subject and nudging Kaylie's shoulder to make her sit back down, diffusing the potentially explosive situation, "How did that go today?"

She was starting therapy? This was news to Payson. She had given her conditions, but Lauren never told her what she was going to do. This pleased her. Lauren wasn't making excuses or false promises, she was doing something to fix the problem. Actions spoke louder than words, and for once Lauren was all action and no words instead of the other way around.

"It was… awkward, I guess. She asked me about why I was there and what my goals were for therapy, which was completely uncomfortable, and then she made me talk about what happened with the video, which was even more uncomfortable."

"I didn't know you were going to therapy, Lo," Kaylie said, unusually subdued. "Why didn't you tell me?"

Lauren shrugged, which was pointless as Kaylie was sitting in the seat behind her and couldn't see. "We haven't talked much lately."

Guilt flashed across Kaylie's face. "I'm sorry about that."

"No, I get it. You've all got pretty good reasons to hate me. And, pathetically, they're all different reasons. That's why I'm doing this." She made eye contact with Payson through the rear view mirror. "I'm glad you suggested it, Payson. I _want_ to change, I just don't know how."

Payson considered her words. It seemed like things were getting better with Lauren, and she didn't want to screw that up by being too hasty in what she said. "What changed? I mean, what made you decide to do it?"

"What you said the other day, about me making the same mistakes over and over again. That's what my mom did—" Lauren's voice cracked. "—and I don't want to be that way. I don't want to follow in her footsteps."

"Do you think we can even stop it?" Kelly asked, sounding dead and hollow. "Maybe we're just doomed to be like our moms, no matter how much we don't want to be."

"No. We choose who we're going to be." It was something Payson believed with conviction. It might be hard to overcome the kind of obstacles that Kelly and Lauren faced, but it wasn't impossible. "You're both making choices to be different. You left, Kelly, and you've stopped behaving the way your mom wanted you to, and Lauren's getting help to change. That's what makes you different from them."

"I hope you're right, Pay."

They lapsed back into silence and stayed that way for most of the next two and a half hours. There were a few brief conversations here and there, but they were all too lost in their own thoughts to talk much.

They maintained their silence when they reached camp. They collected fire wood and kindling, laid the fire, and dumped the large pile of dresses into the dirt without saying a word to each other. It wasn't until Lauren crouched to light the fire that Payson finally spoke. "You never told us why you carry a lighter around in your purse."

"Maybe I secretly smoke," Lauren teased.

Kaylie snorted. "Yeah, right. You would never risk smoking because it would mess with the color of your teeth."

They couldn't help laughing because it was so true. The fact that cigarettes were carcinogenic wouldn't deter Lauren if she wanted to smoke, but vanity would. She didn't do anything that would mess with her appearance. She even got spray tans because "tanning makes you age faster."

"Okay, fine, I would never smoke. I carry around the lighter because I really don't like not being able to see at night." She was blushing scarlet in the firelight.

A giggle bubbled out of Kelly's throat and she covered her mouth with her hand to stop it. "I'm sorry, is that your way of saying that you're afraid of the dark?"

"Shut up," Lauren cried, shoving Kelly in the shoulder. "It's a legitimate fear. I could fall and hurt myself."

"Yeah, or big scary monsters could attack you!" Kelly wasn't even trying to hide her laughs anymore. She was giggling outright and it was contagious. Payson and Kaylie joined in, and soon even Lauren was laughing. It wore on until they were all clutching at each other for support and suddenly all of the tension was gone. They were friends again.

Kaylie managed to reign herself in and asked, "Why a_ lighter_, Lo? Why not just carry a flashlight?"

"I have a flashlight too," Lauren said, pulling it out for emphasis. "The lighter is a back up, incase the batteries die."

That made them double over again, and nobody could say anything for a long time. When Payson managed to have a few seconds between bouts of laughter, she wiped her eyes and said, "Oh my God, I can't believe I didn't know this." She cracked up again and had to wait for her giggles to subside. "How many times have we spent the night together and I never noticed you were afraid of the dark?"

"I just realized something," Kaylie cried, clutching to Payson's arm. "Do you remember a single time we've all slept together when we didn't fall asleep with the TV on? That's why!"

"Guys, come on!" Lauren's indignation set them off again. Every time the girls managed to calm down, someone would say something to make the cycle start again. It continued for so long that Payson's abs began to hurt and she was physically unable to laugh any more.

Kelly swiped her hands across her face, wiping away her tears and replacing them with streaks of dirt. At some point she had pounded on the ground. "Holy shit," she said, "I really needed that."

They all sobered at the reminder of what Kelly was going through and why they were at gymnastics camp in the middle of the night. The dress burning was supposed to be therapeutic, but maybe just being together was what she needed most. Sometimes a half hour of belly-aching laughter was the best kind of release.

"Okay…" Lauren said, "Let's do what we came here for. Kelly, crack open that Bacardi." She passed Kelly a bottle and threw a dress on the ground before her. "Let's burn some dresses."

Kelly opened it, but before she doused the dress in front of her, she lifted the bottle to her lips and threw her head back. She sputtered and coughed after she swallowed, and answered their questioning looks with a shrug and the words "Liquid courage."

She tilted the bottle sideways and the rum spilled out over her dress, leaving a dark stain as the liquid pooled over the fabric. Then she handed the bottle to Payson.

Payson contemplated. This was not something she did. She'd never had a drop of alcohol in her life, but there was so much going on right now that she could use a release from. All of the crap with Lauren, the still-present tension with Kaylie, the unease she felt in her relationship with Max, and a growing fear that things were going to change with Sasha and she couldn't stop it. She made up her mind. "What the hell."

She took a swig and passed it to Kaylie, who drank without hesitation and handed it to Lauren. They were all surprised with Lauren sat the bottle down by their feet without taking a drink. "I have to drive us home," she explained.

Kelly shrugged and threw the dress into the fire. They all screamed when the flames shot up, reacting to the alcohol, and Kelly let out a hysterical laugh. "Holy shit, give me that bottle. I have to do that again!"

She doused another dress and threw it in with the first, but this time they cheered instead of screamed in reaction to the fire. They had to wait for the smoldering clothes to burn down before they could add anymore, and after a few more dresses and a couple more shots each, they realized that doing it one at a time would take way too long.

Kelly was just close enough to sober to realize that they couldn't spread the dresses out to burn on the ground without the fire spreading, so they moved to the parking lot. Lauren proved that she had thought ahead to more than just the alcohol by pulling a fire extinguisher out of her trunk, and they laid several dresses out side by side on the pavement. They busted out a few more bottles of Bacardi and poured the contents out onto the ground. Then Kelly lit a rolled up piece of paper on fire and dropped it.

They jumped back when the dresses caught alight with shooting flames. The alcohol on the ground burned off quickly, but the clothing stayed on fire and continued to burn while they cheered and made a ruckus. When there was more ash than fabric, the girls piled on more dresses. Lauren pointed out that they couldn't pour the Bacardi on top of live flames without getting burned, so they decided to throw a bottle onto the pyre instead.

Someone had the genius idea to videotape this, so Payson pulled out her phone. She centered the camera on Kelly—well, as much as she could center it with the world tilting like it was—and pressed record. Kelly held up the bottle of rum and said, "Mom, this is just a little preview of what it's going to be like when you burn in hell." She took a huge swig and then chucked the bottle hard at the ground. It shattered and there was a bright flash as the fire reignited like a bonfire.

They were a drunken mess. They stumbled and laughed their way through the rest of the dresses, ripping some of them before lighting them on fire, yelling obscenities directed at Sheila, and videotaping most of it. The grand finale was when Lauren pulled the pin on the fire extinguisher and sprayed the smoldering mess into submission.

Lauren had the unfortunate job of cleaning everything up because the rest of them could barely stand straight. They leaned against the side of the car and screamed instructions at her, laughing at things that weren't remotely funny. To Lauren's credit, she didn't complain once. She just fixed the disaster they had made of camp and helped them all into the car for the long drive back.

* * *

><p>Things had finally settled down in the car. For the first half hour or so she had been bombarded with the sounds of her very drunk friends' laughter. They were cracked up by several un-funny things, like the sign that said 'SLOW CHILDREN AT PLAY' and the field of cows that they passed. Kelly had stuck her head out the window and yelled "Hey cow!" as they drove by, which drove Kaylie and Payson to hysteria. Lauren made a note to herself to never, <em>ever<em>, get that drunk.

Kelly and Kaylie were asleep now. At least, she hoped they were asleep and not passed out or dead. Payson was still awake, but she was curled up against the backseat window and talking on the phone in hushed tones. Lauren was very carefully not listening to that conversation. She was glad that Payson was speaking to her again, but she didn't want to hear whatever lovey-dovey drunken crap Max and Payson were saying over the phone.

She was surprised at how long that conversation lasted. From her experience Max was more of a doer than a talker, but they had been on the phone for over an hour, and in the middle of the night no less. Maybe Max should be with Payson if they could have that kind of relationship. He certainly never talked to her that way.

Payson didn't hang up for another forty-five minutes, and by that time Lauren had grown accustomed to the murmur of her voice in the background. It was chilling when there was suddenly complete silence in the car. They were almost back to Boulder, which was good because Lauren didn't want to be alone with her thoughts for too much longer. Payson and Max had talked on the phone for nearly two hours. She couldn't imagine what they had to say to each other that would take that long. She was a little curious and more than a little jealous. She had never talked to anyone over the phone for that long, and she wondered if maybe that was because she'd never had a relationship close enough to warrant it.

She had to stop thinking about it. She shouldn't be freaking out because Payson had a long conversation with her boyfriend. This was exactly the type of thing that she was supposed to talk to her shrink about instead of obsessing over it.

She spent the last half hour of the drive in total quiet. She was glad when she pulled into her driveway and could finally get out of the claustrophobic car. Her dad came out to help her get the other girls inside, and she was thankful that he was so cool about it. She called him very early into the drive to tell him that her friends were drunk and she was bringing them home for what was left of the night to sleep it off. The only question he asked was if she had been drinking too, and when she told him no he said he was proud of her for being responsible and making sure that her friends stayed safe.

He carried Kelly in first and then came back to get Kaylie. Payson was still somewhat awake, so Lauren helped her walk to the bedroom where her dad had already put out an air mattress for them. When all three girls were safely lying down, she followed her dad out into the hallway.

"Are you going to call their parents?" she asked. She didn't want to get them in trouble when she was just as guilty as they were. She might not have been drinking, but she supplied the liquor for them.

"No, I'm not, though I'm sure that they will notice anyway. I'm not going to cover for you, either. All of you will be at the gym in three hours and you will face whatever consequences Sasha gives you. And not just them. You too. Just because you didn't drink not does mean that you weren't a part of it. I know you took a case of rum from the basement."

"We weren't planning to drink it," she defended. "We just needed it as a fire accelerant. Which, by the way, our fire extinguisher is empty now."

Her dad shook his head in exasperation. "I don't know whether to be angry or proud. Although I think what you did counteracts all of the points you get for taking precautions. We will discuss punishment after practice."

"Daddy!"

"No, Lauren. Underage drinking is not a joke. I'm glad that you were as safe as possible, but that wasn't safe enough. You played dangerous game and you're lucky nobody got hurt. I'm going to make sure you never do anything this stupid again."

She grumbled and went to bed. She'd work on him in the morning. And no matter what happened, she wasn't sorry she did it. Sometimes there were more important things than doing what was right or safe.

* * *

><p>Sasha couldn't believe they got drunk. Or rather, he couldn't believe that Payson and Kelly got drunk. Kaylie didn't surprise him much.<p>

He would never, _ever_, admit this out loud, but talking to a drunk Payson had been rather entertaining. It was the same as their normal nightly phone calls, telling each other about their days and going off on a tangent or two when some tidbit sparked a deeper conversation, but Payson's side of the conversation was winding and circular. He asked he why she had been drinking and it took her over five minutes to say what boiled down to "I'm stressed out and I need to get my mind off of things."

He didn't expect them to come in on time, if at all, so he was surprised when he came downstairs to find Payson, Kelly, and Kaylie sprawled out on the mats while Lauren stretched beside them. They all looked like hell, although Lauren not nearly as much, and Payson was wearing her sunglasses to block out the lights. Kelly, who he gathered drank the most, appeared to be asleep.

He came to a halt in front of them. "Ladies. Would you care to explain?"

"No."

It took all of his self control not to laugh at Payson's petulant response. He couldn't let them get away with this. He understood the reasons behind their behavior and didn't want to punish them, but he had to make a showing for the gym. If they had just stayed home he wouldn't have done anything, but now that they were at the gym hung over (or possibly still drunk) he had no choice.

"Let me rephrase," he said, putting on a stern façade. "Explain yourselves or you will still be under punishment when Nationals roll back around."

The threat of eight months of punishment didn't have the effect he had hoped for. Lauren ignored him, Kaylie groaned and rolled over, and Payson flashed him a rude hand gesture. He barely managed to contain his laugh that time. It came out more like a grunt.

Kelly squinted at him and answered, "My mother is a psycho bitch. Is that a good enough excuse?"

Yes, but he couldn't say that. "What about those two?" he asked, nodding toward Payson and Kaylie.

"They were keeping me company."

"And you?" he asked Lauren, the only sober one of the bunch. She wasn't hung over, but she still stayed up all night and drove six hours in one evening, so she looked pretty bad.

She shrugged. "I was the designated driver."

He left, and as he walked away he heard Lauren say, "What just happened?"

He grabbed four bottles of water from the refrigerator and a package of aspirin from his desk and headed back down stairs. He tossed the aspirin to Lauren and handed her each girl a bottle of water—or rather, he handed one to Lauren and sat the rest beside the girls on the ground. "Take two of those each and drink the water, then get started on the standard conditioning circuit. If you aren't up and moving in fifteen minutes then I will double everything."

He retreated to his office where he could laugh without being seen. He didn't know what the hell they were thinking coming in here today.

It wasn't quite so funny when Kim walked into the office a few minutes later. "Is it just me," she asked, "or do my children appear to be hung over?"

He couldn't stop his smile. Kim Keeler was one of his favorite people in the world—second only to her daughter, really—and here was a prime example of why. It had been exactly a week since Kelly came to live with them and she just said 'my children,' including both Payson and Kelly.

"Yes, they do. I think that has something to do with the large amounts of alcohol they drank last night."

If looks could kill, he would be dead. "I don't really think this is the right time for sarcasm, Sasha. This isn't like Payson. She's never had a drink in her life, even when her friends were. What could have possibly made her do something like this?"

"When I asked them Kelly said, and I quote, 'my mother is a psycho bitch.' If anyone ever had a good reason to get pissed, it's them. They've had a rough week." She didn't look like she agreed, so he tried to placate her. "Is this really so bad, Kim? Didn't you ever do anything like this when you were seventeen? I'm lucky I didn't get arrested when I was their age, but this is the first thing they've ever really done wrong. From where I'm standing they don't look so bad."

Kim sank into her chair with a sigh. "You're right, I did much worse things when I was their age. But they could at least have invited me. I could use a drink right about now."

He burst out laughing. She had admonished him about sarcasm, but she was a million times worse. He reached down into his desk drawer, way at the back, and pulled out a bottle of single malt. He sat it down in front of her and she started laughing as well.

He collected two Dixie cups from the water cooler and splashed some whiskey into each, handing one cup to Kim. She toasted him and they both took a sip. As soon as he felt the burn in the back of his throat, because the world had a twisted sense of humor, Summer Van Horne walked through the door.

She stopped dead in her tracks when she saw the whiskey bottle between them. Kim, never one to apologize for her behavior, lifted her glass and asked, "Can I get you a drink, Summer?"

"I… what… Kim…" she stuttered, unable to speak coherently. Finally she managed to say, "It's eight o'clock in the morning!"

"I realize that, Summer, but I happened to mention that I needed a drink and Sasha very gallantly—" she winked at him "—offered me one."

He was doing a poor job of hiding his snickers. Summer glared at him and asked, "Is there something going on here that I don't know about? First Kaylie, Kelly, and Payson look like they've been run over by a truck, and now the two of you are up here drinking. And while there are young, impressionable children downstairs, I might add."

Summer's words reminded him of his duties, so he stepped around her and yelled down to the floor, "Girls! Get to work!"

He was pretty sure that Payson yelled "Bite me," but he was halfway back in the office and pretended not to hear it. Kim heard, though, and took a big gulp of her whiskey in response.

It annoyed him that Summer had managed to overlook Lauren's haggard appearance, so he let slip some information that he wasn't supposed to know. "I wouldn't discount Lauren in this scheme, Summer. She supplied the liquor."

"She what!"

"Did I not speak clearly?" he asked Kim. He was patronizing Summer just for the fun of it. "I'd like to know if I'm having some sort of problem making myself understood. That would put me in a very difficult position as a coach."

Summer ignored his antics, or at least pretended to, and said, "Excuse me, I need to go call Steve." She brushed past him and left.

"That wasn't very nice, Sasha."

She didn't sound condemning, so he wasn't worried about her disapproval. He jerked his thumb back through the door. "They have their way of unwinding; I have mine."

"You are a horrible person, Sasha Belov," she said, "and a bad influence on Payson."

He grinned. "I know I am. But that's why you love me, right?"

* * *

><p>AN: So this is about a week past due :( I'm sorry guys. My other story grew a little bit. I originally expected it to be about 80,000 words, but I'm there already and it is still going. So since I will be a while longer on that, I'm going to make a concerted effort to work on both stories at once. And maybe a chapter of C&M while I'm at it, because my other work keeps wandering off in that direction, where it is not supposed to be.

Fair warning—I won't be writing anything for the next week. I have comprehensive exams on Friday and national boards on Saturday, so I'm not going near Microsoft Word until they are over. I'll do my best to get a chapter done on Sunday, though.

I'm glad to be back in MKB world!


	10. Chapter 10

Disclaimer: If I owned MIOBI I wouldn't be dying of curiosity about season 3 right now.

A/N: You should go to YouTube and search Valeri Liukin before you read this so you understand his accent. It's the most adorable mix between Russian and Texan.

* * *

><p>His gym was home to the past two Olympic All Around Champions, both of who were frequently there and working with the younger girls, and half a dozen former National Team members, but when Payson Keeler and Kelly Parker walked through his doors the entire gym came to a halt.<p>

It was understandable that they were staring at the two girls. Carly and Nastia were part of everyday life here, but these two were novel interests for his gymnasts. Kelly Parker was a media icon, and Payson Keeler… was Payson Keeler. There was more media interest in her after one World Championship than there was for Carly or Nastia after they won their Olympic Championships. The whole world was in love with this girl.

Payson had her phone to her ear, which Valeri was not happy about. He didn't allow phones in his gym, and he was sure that Sasha did not either, so Payson should know better. He approached them as she began her conversation.

"Did you just wake up?" she was saying.

Kelly Parker ignored her teammate and stepped forward to shake his hand. "Coach Liukin, thank you so much for letting us train here today. We really appreciate it, and I know Sasha does, too."

She was a charmer, this one. She had a smile that stopped him in his tracks and knew exactly what to say to ingratiate herself with him. If he wasn't careful he'd be eating out of the palm of her hand before the day was over.

"I am happy to have you both," he said. "My daughter would never forgive me if you missed her party. Your coach is a tough one, though, to not let you take one day off from training. You should keep him in line, like my girls have kept me."

She laughed at his teasing. "Don't worry, we do. But we didn't want to take the day off either. Training here for the day was the perfect compromise." She nodded toward her friend. "Sorry about the phone, by the way. Sasha makes us check in when we train in other cities, and we've been trying to call him for the past ten minutes."

That explained it. Respecting the rules of your home gym was always more important than respecting the rules of another gym, at least as far as the trivial matters went.

Payson's indignant cry broke across his conversation with Kelly. "Sasha!"

After a pause she said, "I said that you should get to know him better, not that you should get him drunk. You're his coach!"

Kelly didn't seem to understand the conversation either, so they both stared at Payson in confusion. "Okay, I'm going to train now," she said. Valeri felt about two inches tall at the condescension in her voice, and it wasn't even directed at him. "You get your ass out of bed and to the Rock. I hope you have a hang over all day."

"What was that about?" Kelly asked as soon as Payson hung up the phone.

The young gymnast, who reminded him so much of his own daughter, rolled her eyes. It was an expression he had seen on Nastia's face many times. "Sasha and Marty took Austin out drinking last night. You know what the three of them are like, so you can imagine how that turned out."

"That is such a double standard!" cried Kelly. "He tortured us for drinking the other day."

"You were drinking?" he asked with a frown. That was not a good habit for a young woman to have, especially not one who was one of the best elite gymnasts in the world.

He could not interpret the look that passed across Kelly Parker's face. "Trust me, we had a really, really good reason." For some reason that he could not explain, he believed her.

"Which is why Sasha went easy on us," Payson told her friend.

Kelly paled. "_That_ was going easy?"

"Definitely easy," Payson said. "But come on, we need to get to work."

She turned to him and smiled. Her smile was almost as enchanting as Kelly's. "We would be honored to receive any help you give us, Coach Liukin, but please don't feel obligated. We don't want to take you away from your own gymnasts, and Kelly and I more than capable of running practice by ourselves."

"Please, call me Valeri. And I would be a fool to pass up the chance of working with you young ladies. I am anxious to see if you truly can rival my Nastia."

Payson's smile widened and it crinkled her nose. "I was hoping you would say that. Sasha says that I'm not allowed to practice my new skills on bars unless you are personally spotting me. Which means he really trusts you, by the way, because he hasn't let me do them once without him right there with me."

"I understand. It was the same way for me with Nastia, I would not let anybody else spot her." It was the reason he started coaching her. He tried to let others work with her, but he just didn't trust anyone else to keep her safe. "What new moves do you have?"

"A stoop through to a handstand with a full turn, and a backward swing to a piked forward salto."

Ever calm, he raised one eyebrow and asked, "Has your coach lost his mind? He must be crazy to let you do those skills." The stoop 1/1 had never been done by a woman, and it was one of the more difficult skills for men to perform. For Payson, because she was a woman and the move would be more difficult for her, it would be an F level skill. And that forward salto was the most difficult skill in the code of points in the tucked position, much less piked.

"He probably is crazy," she said with a laugh, "But it's a quality we share."

"Go warm up," he told them. "I would like to see your bars."

He had a lot to contemplate while the girls warmed up. Sasha was mad to let her do those skills, especially considering that she was in a back brace only a few months ago. People were still tittering about the double double stretched she did at Worlds, and that was only one skill. If she added another G skill and an F, the gymnastics community would be up in arms. There was already controversy over whether the Code of Points encouraged difficulty over artistry.

He had another worry as well. He'd heard the rumors about Sasha and Payson, everybody had, but he never gave them credit. He'd known Sasha for a long time, and he was a good man. Troubled at times, but essentially good at heart. Valerie had always scoffed at the idea that Sasha would be involved with one of his gymnasts, but now he had his doubts.

Payson had not spoken to him like he was her coach. She was polite and deferential to Valerie, but with Sasha she was casual and all too comfortable. She spoke of him with fond exasperation, as well, much like Nastia did when she talked about Evan. At best they were friends. At worst they were lovers. He would keep a close watch on her while she was here and try to determine the nature of their relationship.

She talked him though her bars routine before they began, so that he would know where to spot her, and he added up her D-score in his head. Two Gs, two Fs, two Es, and multiple Ds and Cs. That was a 4.4 difficulty value, and then she had a full point in connection bonuses. _A 7.9_. It was complete madness. Nobody had that kind of score under the new code of points. Nastia's Olympic routine would only be a 6.6 on the new system.

He had to admit that she did it well, though. It was the most difficult routine he'd ever seen and she made it look easy and graceful. So many people were clamoring for more artistry and less difficulty in the sport, but here were both combined in one tiny girl.

He sent a wary look toward Kelly. "Are you going to terrify me, too?"

"No," she laughed, "I'm not insane like Payson. I'll stick with my very difficult 6.8 and not feel the need to break the record for craziest routine ever like Payson does."

She was very good. Nowhere near as good as Payson was, but she hadn't been training with Sasha very long, either. Valeri might be worried about Sasha's relationship with Payson, but there was no denying that he was the best gymnastics coach in the world. He stressed execution above all else.

He was well pleased with what he saw on bars and was anxious to evaluate them on the remaining three apparatuses. They were about to move to the beam, which had been Payson's biggest weakness at Worlds, when a voice stopped them in their tracks. "Payson?"

* * *

><p>She closed her eyes and let out a slow breath, hoping to keep her frustration out of her voice. She completely forgot that Nicky Russo was training at WOGA now. She put on a fake smile and turned around. "Hey, Nicky."<p>

He was still Nicky Russo, still handsome and shy, but her heart didn't flutter like it used to when she was around him. All she felt was annoyance that her workout was interrupted and embarrassment at seeing her first kiss for the first time since her very awkward dismissal of him outside the Rock.

"What are you doing here?" he asked.

"We're here for Nastia's party, and Valeri is letting us train here for the day."

"Us?" Yep, definitely still Nicky Russo, too focused on gymnastics to know what was going on around him. It was shocking to realize that she used to be the same way.

She couldn't stop the roll of her eyes. He was just too oblivious. "Yeah, us," she said, waving her hand to her friend. "Me and Kelly."

His surprise was cartoonish. The way his head whipped toward Kelly and the blush that spread across both their cheeks sprouted suspicions in Payson's head about why Nicky left Denver Elite. Apparently running away from girls was a habit for him.

As much as she didn't want to do this, she was going to have to talk to him. It would cause tension in the gym if they spent the day avoiding each other. "Valeri, would you mind if Nick and I took a few minutes to catch up?"

Valeri Liukin was a very perceptive man, much like Sasha, and Payson thought he understood the situation. He surely noticed the awkwardness between the three gymnasts, Kelly's embarrassment, Payson's discomfiture, and Nicky's over-eargerness. "Of course," he said, "but do not be too long. I want to see your beam after Kelly's."

He did understand, and he was giving her an out. She couldn't be stuck too long in the conversation because he put a time limit on it.

Payson and Nicky moved to the side of the gym and sat on a stack of mats. As expected, Nicky breached the conversation with gymnastics. "So, you're working with Valeri today. How's that going?"

"Good. We've only done bars so far, but he gave me some really good tips on my stoop through pirouette. Sasha's legs are too long to have ever done that move really well, but Valeri knows just how it should feel."

"You're doing a stoop half?" he asked, frowning.

She understood the frown, because she'd seen it every time she told a man that she was doing it. With the notable exception of Sasha and Valeri, they all thought that because it was traditionally a men's move Payson wouldn't be able to do it. So she got no small amount of joy in answering, "Actually I'm doing a stoop full."

Nicky could only do the half. His less than decorous response was, "Why?"

She got asked that question a lot, too, and the answer was equally fun. "Because it's pretty, and Sasha wants my routines to look as graceful as possible."

Guys never dealt well with one of their skills being described as pretty, and Nicky was no exception. He changed the subject. "So I'm surprised to see you here with Kelly. Aren't you supposed to be mortal enemies or something?"

Her laugh was genuine. "More like best friends now. You know how Sasha is about team bonding. I guess it worked."

"How… how is she?" he asked. "How are things with her mom?"

Payson took a roundabout way of answering the question, not wanting to come right out and say that Kelly cut ties with her mother. "She's good. She's living with us now."

"Oh God," he said, his face paling. "What did Sheila do?"

"It's not what Sheila did that's important, it's what Kelly did. She got out." Nicky obviously knew the basics of Kelly's home life, but Payson wasn't going to deliver him the specifics. It was none of his business unless Kelly wanted it to be.

Before the changes that Sasha wrought in her, Payson would have been too timid to ask this, but now she had no difficulty saying, "So how awkwardly did things end between the two of you? More awkward than us or less?"

He seemed surprised, and rightly so. The Payson Keeler that he knew would never have said that, but she was a different person now. "Probably more. Her mom found out and forbid us to see each other, and then I left a couple of weeks later."

"You know, running away is not a good way to solve your problems. You might want to break that habit."

He was surprised again, but her forwardness seemed to inspire him to be blunt as well, and he uttered the complete non-sequitur, "So what's going on with you and Sasha?"

She couldn't tell if he was asking out of concern or jealousy. Considering that he had dated her best friend, she hoped it was concern. "Nothing but a coaching relationship. That whole thing was blown way out of proportion because Ellen Beals wanted Sasha and I both out of the sport."

"Didn't you kiss him?"

"Yeah, well, I kissed you too. One kiss doesn't mean anything, Nick." She wished she could take the words back as soon as she said them. She didn't mean to imply that the kiss she shared with Nicky was meaningless, because it wasn't. All she meant was that a relationship couldn't be decided on the basis of a single kiss.

Nicky cast an awkward glance around the gym, like he was looking for an escape route. Finally he looked in her eyes and said, "Look, this conversation isn't going the way I wanted. I just want to know if you're okay."

"I'm fine, Nick," she assured him. "I'm better than fine. I don't think I've been this happy in years. I got so caught up in winning that I forgot about _everything_ else. I finally figured out that there is more to life than gymnastics."

He wasn't there yet, and he probably thought she was insane. It suddenly occurred to her that maybe that was why Austin was a better gymnast than Nicky was, because Austin understood that winning wasn't everything. Nicky thought wearing gold was his right; Austin thought it was his privilege.

"Well, I… I guess that's good, then." Yeah, he definitely thought she was insane. "We should probably get back to training…"

He started to stand but Payson reached out to stop him. "You should talk to Kelly, Nick. She deserves better than you gave her."

She didn't know all the circumstances behind their break up, but he left, just like he'd done with her and Kaylie, and that wasn't fair to Kelly. He nodded his assent and said, "Yeah, she really does."

* * *

><p>Several of the little girls came to hug her when she got to the gym; the greetings never failed to make her smile. She looked around for Payson and Kelly and found them by the bars, deep in discussion with her dad. As she watched Payson climbed on to the bars and swung to build her momentum. One, two, three backward swings before she released into a forward salto… <em>piked<em>. Wow.

Payson caught sight of her as she dropped down from the bars and the two girls headed over. She met them halfway with a hug for each. "It's so good to see you! I'm so glad that ya'll could come."

"I'm glad we could come, too," Payson said with a laugh. "It breaks up the monotony."

Nastia remembered well how monotonous training could get, and she was glad to give Payson and Kelly an excuse to switch things up a bit. Even training in another gym was a novelty when you did the same thing with the same people every day.

"I brought us lunch," she said, holding up a carryout bag. "Why don't we go up to my dad's office for a while?"

"That sounds great, but I have to call Sasha first. He makes us check in three times a day whenever we're out of town."

"Sure, no problem. Let's head upstairs and you can call him from there." She led them to her dad's office, and she and Kelly went inside to set up lunch. Payson stayed sitting at the top of the stairs to make her phone call.

"You know, we might as well go ahead and eat," said Kelly. "She's going to take forever. Sasha makes her give him a complete run down of every skill we've worked on."

"Wow, and I thought my dad was strict."

"Tell me about it," Kelly said. "I have never worked with a coach that was as strict as Sasha. He wants _perfection_." She laughed, and it was different somehow from the way she laughed in interviews. She was different in a lot of ways, actually.

Kelly had always seemed a little bit… fake. She was an amazing gymnast, and she obviously loved the sport, but off the mat she was like a paper doll. She had no depth, no dimension. The Kelly Parker here today was a person, actual and whole, with no fakeness at all. Her laugh and smile were genuine and there was actual emotion behind what she was saying. She reminded Nastia a lot of Shawn.

Shawn had been friends with Kelly for a long time. She was only a year older than Payson and Kelly, as opposed to Nastia who was almost four years their senior, and had known them much better. Nastia had always wondered why Shawn, who was one of the most open, honest, and upbeat people she knew, would be friends with Kelly Parker, but maybe this was the reason. Shawn tended to bring out the best in people, so maybe she uncovered the real Kelly before the rest of the world did.

She would never have said no to Payson's request to bring Kelly, but she'd been concerned. She didn't know what on earth they would talk about, but it turned out that she was easy to chat with. They talked about trivial things, like the shopping trip the two girls had taken after they landed in Dallas the night before and their mutual love of designer shoes, and then Kelly begged to hear about the Beijing Olympics. It was a time of her life that Nastia never got tired of talking about, and Kelly asked questions with avid curiosity. When Payson finally rejoined them, they continued the same train of discussion. She'd asked these same questions to Carly a million times, so it was fun to be on the opposite side of the conversation.

She was sad when it was time to leave. She would rather have stayed and worked out with them, but she had a lot to do before the party. Her whole Olympic team was staying at her house that night, so she needed to make sure everything was ready and her dogs couldn't get to any of the food. She gave them each a quick hug and warned, "Don't let my dad kill ya'll while I'm gone. He can get a little crazy sometimes."

"Trust me, he's not nearly as crazy as Sasha," was Payson's ominous reply. "If anybody is going to work us to death, it will definitely be him."

* * *

><p>Opulent. That was the word that Payson thought best described Nastia's 21st birthday party. She had rented out a club called The Glass Lounge, and it was very Nastia. It was all pinks and whites and crystal. Kaylie would have loved it. Payson was ambivalent. She didn't really care about the decorations, she was more interested in the people.<p>

Nastia had spared no expense. She provided limos to transport all of her out of town guests to the party so that they wouldn't have to navigate the unfamiliar streets of Dallas. There were two limos dedicated to the hotel that Kelly and Payson were staying at, and they happened to be carrying some notable names. Among them were Michael Phelps, Aly Michalka, Jon Horton, Alex Morgan, Taylor Swift, and Evan Lysacek, just to name a few. Payson talked mostly to Jon, who she had known casually for years, and Evan, who she knew really well through Nastia. She was more than a little intimidated by some of the other passengers in their car.

She wished Austin had come. He bailed when he found out that Payson and Kelly were both going, because he didn't want to make Kaylie feel left out. She was going to have to talk to him about that. He couldn't spend the rest of his life trying to shelter Kaylie Cruz. It was bad for both of them.

She was having fun, but she would be having more fun if Austin was there to ward off all the guys who were hitting on her. She would be having the _most_ fun if Sasha was there with her, but that was never going to happen. She danced with Evan a few times, but he was obviously spending most of his time with Nastia, so she spent her time moving between a few of the nicer male gymnasts and various groups of girls that she knew.

The highlight of the night so far had been chatting with Carly Patterson. She'd known Carly for years, but the hero worship never quite wore off. Carly had been one of her biggest supporters during her comeback, and that had meant the world to Payson. She asked for all of the details about Payson's win in Rio, which she happily shared. The best part was that she wasn't asking out of politeness. She was completely, 100% interested.

It was during that conversation that Payson heard an excited squeal over the loud music. "Kelly!"

Payson and Carly both turned to see Kelly and Shawn rush toward each other into an excited, bouncing hug. They were both talking ninety to nothing and making wild gestures with their hands, and Payson couldn't help but laugh. She had never understood the relationship those two shared, but it was good to see Kelly so happy. Now that she could watch them with an objective eye, not colored by jealousy that Kelly was such good friends with an Olympic Champion, she could see that they were quite similar. In retrospect she was glad that Kelly had Shawn to support her in a time when she really had no other friends.

The night was a whirlwind of hugs and congratulations. She almost felt like the party was for her win at Worlds instead of for Nastia's birthday, because so many people were coming up to her. It was so overwhelming that she remembered relatively little of it, but a few key moments stood out. She remembered talking to Alicia, who she'd always thought was one of the most supportive people in the world, and she remembered getting a bear hug from Bela Karolyi. That part was hard to forget, because Bela Karolyi standing against a backdrop of pink curtains and surrounded by twenty-somethings dancing to pop music was a once in a lifetime sight. She was also certain that she talked to Chellsie for nearly twenty minutes, but she couldn't recall a single word they said. It was all too much. She needed Sasha here to ground her.

The walk to the balcony was a daze. She hugged a couple dozen people, she stopped once to dance with Danell, and she noticed Kelly standing in a corner talking to Nicky but couldn't think clearly enough to know if that was good or bad. As soon as she was out in the fresh air her head started to clear.

Sasha picked up on the first ring. "Shouldn't you be at a party?" he asked with a laugh.

"I needed a break." She took a long pause. "Actually, I just need you."

"What's wrong?" he asked, his worry carrying through the phone.

She thought about it and couldn't find a single problem to complain about, but she still felt like she was being crushed. "Nothing is wrong, that's what makes this so crazy. Ever since I got back to the Rock I've been suffocating. I thought that coming here, getting away from everything, would help but it's just made it worse."

"Payson, it's normal for you to feel this way. Your whole world has been turned upside down. Winning at Worlds threw you into a celebrity lifestyle, and it put a lot of pressure on you to keep winning. And then your personal life is completely different now, with Kelly living with you and everything that is going on with Lauren. A lot has changed for you and it's going to take a while to adjust."

"What if I can't, Sasha? What if this is all too much for me and I can't do it?" she asked.

He didn't hesitate to answer. "You can. You're the strongest person I know. You can do it."

"I feel like such a horrible person," she admitted. "Kelly's whole life is falling apart but I'm feeling sorry for myself. I should be better than this."

"You're not a horrible person, Pay. You're human. Just give yourself time."

She took a deep breath and wiped the water from her eyes, ignoring the streak of eyeliner left on her finger. "It was a mistake to come here. I thought I needed space but what I really need is you. You are the only thing keeping me grounded right now. I don't know what I would do without you, Sasha."

"You'll never have to find out," he promised. "You're never going to be without me."

* * *

><p>Valeri would punish his daughter for doing something like this, but he couldn't seem to stop himself. He'd been on his way to the restroom when he heard a familiar voice outside say, "Actually, I just need you."<p>

He justified his eavesdropping as concern for Payson's wellbeing, but it was a thin excuse. He knew it was wrong to listen in on her conversation. What he didn't know was why he was still doing it.

He listened as she described the entrapment she felt and recognized it for what it was, the entrapment of success. He had experienced it himself, as had Carly and Nastia. It was a normal thing to feel, but that was hard to believe when it was happening to you. She would overcome it in time.

Then she confirmed his fears. "What if I can't, Sasha?"

It was the reason he stopped to listen, this suspicion that the person she claimed to need was Sasha Belov. He lost track of the conversation as he contemplated the implications of what he was hearing, but he honed back in when she professed her need for him again. It was all so unclear. She could be referring to a romantic relationship, or she could be talking about a close relationship between a coach and athlete. It was possible that she meant she needed his support and guidance, not anything more illicit.

He forced himself away from the balcony doors, leaving Payson alone to her conversation, but he couldn't stop himself from wandering in that direction every so often. His suspicions only mounted as the time wore on. He checked on her in fifteen minute increments, and it wasn't until his sixth trip to the balcony that she was gone. He scanned the room and found her talking to Kelly and Shawn, acting as if she hadn't had a panic attack earlier in the evening and hadn't been on the phone with her coach for well over an hour.

There was just one thing certain in his mind: he needed to see Payson and Sasha together to judge if there was anything untoward going on between them.

* * *

><p>AN: Ah, name dropping. Gotta love it.

I envisioned Payson's new skills on bars before I even knew they were possible. MostepanovaFan's YouTube video helped me with the forward pike (btw, if you want to see that done in the tucked position, search YouTube for uneven bars release moves guide), but the stoop 1/1 was harder to find. If I hadn't got obsessed with men's gymnastics lately I wouldn't even know what to call it (search YouTube for stoop 1/1 and watch the first video. It's the pirouette, not the release that comes after).

I've had a really horrible day, so I need reviews to make me feel better. Bonus points to those of you who catch the _Serenity_ reference. Actually, better than bonus points… _spoilers_ for those of you who catch the _Serenity_ reference.


	11. Chapter 11

Disclaimer: If I owned MIOBI, Sasha and Payson would have had a very passionate kiss before they said goodbye on tonight's episode.

A/N: Okay, this story is officially AU now.

* * *

><p>"Explain to me again why we're having lunch at the local high school, where we don't attend."<p>

Kelly was trying to sound annoyed, but Payson recognized the real emotion behind her words. She was nervous. Behind all her bluff and bravado, Kelly was very shy and didn't know how to act around new people. It was one of the reasons she stuck with her Queen Bitch personality so much. If she was a bitch to people, she didn't have to bother figuring out the right thing to say.

"Heather and I have a standing lunch date every other Monday," she explained for the fourth time. "We normally meet at the Spruce Juice, but she has a meeting with the homecoming committee after lunch and can't go off campus, so we're coming to her."

"If she can't leave school then why don't you just push it off until next week?" Kelly persisted, trying her hardest to get out of it.

Payson wasn't going to bite. It would be good for Kelly to meet new people and learn about a life outside of gymnastics. "Kelly, I haven't seen her for over a month, with Worlds and the media tour, and then that stupid parade last week. I miss my friend. Don't worry, you'll like Heather. Or at least she'll pester you until you like her, like she did with me."

She couldn't keep the affection out of her voice for her first (and only) non-gymnastics friend. Heather had been good for her and she would be good for Kelly, too. The peppy girl had the market cornered on unconditional love, and Kelly could use a little more of that right now.

Kelly grumbled under her breath, which Payson took as implicit agreement to the date, so she opened the car door and stepped out into the school she hadn't been to for a few months. She'd hated it most of the time she was there, but she was willing to look back and admit that it had been a good experience. It taught her how to have a life outside of gymnastics, and that was something that she hadn't known since she was five years old.

Kelly came to stand beside her and grumbled again. "We should have changed clothes. It's embarrassing to be out in public in a leo."

"Kelly," she said, rolling her eyes, "We spend half of every day in a leo, most of that time with no cover ups. We go to the Spruce Juice like this all the time. Being outside in our gym clothes is not that big of a deal."

"Payson!" Both girls turned toward the source of the call, a short, blonde, smiling girl who was waving her hands in the air and almost hopping with excitement.

Payson squealed, a sound that surprised even herself, and ran to meet her friend. Heather met her in the middle and they shared a very happy, very girly hug. "It's so good to see you! It feels like it's been forever."

"It's good to see you, too, World Champion! I knew you could do it."

Heather had been nearly as supportive of her as Sasha had, and knowing that she had so many people rooting for her had been one of the biggest things that got her through Worlds. A year ago she didn't think she needed anybody. Now she knew how stupid she'd been.

"Come on," she said, leading Heather back to where Kelly was still standing, shifting awkwardly on her feet. "You need to meet Kelly. She's staying with my family now."

Heather, with all of her usual enthusiasm, strode forward to hug Kelly, who seemed to have no idea how to respond. "Kelly Parker, World bronze medalist, right? I was watching on TV. Your bars were amazing."

"Thanks," Kelly responded. Her smile was hesitant, but she was making an effort. "It's nice to meet you."

"You too!" Heather didn't seem to notice Kelly's awkwardness. She grabbed both of their hands and dragged them to one of the lunch tables spread across the lawn, talking ninety to nothing the whole time.

They talked a lot as they ate the lunch Kim made for them, but it was mostly Heather and Payson who maintained the conversation. Kelly spoke when spoken to, but didn't volunteer much. She was growing more comfortable, though; Payson could tell. Heather's Golden Retriever-esq personality was wearing her down, and soon the two girls would be just as fond of each other as Payson was of each of them. She knew it was a good idea to bring Kelly with her.

Kelly was keeping up a steady stream of texts during the meal, and Payson knew exactly who they were from. She'd been talking to and texting Nicky ever since they left Dallas on Sunday morning. So far she'd been tight lipped about it, but Payson was determined to get the details out of her. Kelly was always on her case about Sasha, so it was time for a little payback. Now was as good a time as any.

"So… who are you talking to?"

Kelly glared at her, not buying the act one bit. "You know exactly who I'm talking to, so stop with the innocent act."

"Ooh," Heather said, perking up at the hint of good old fashioned girl talk. "Is this your boyfriend?"

Payson said "yes" at the exact same time that Kelly said "no."

Kelly glared at her again. "He's not my boyfriend. He's… a friend who's a boy."

"Who you used to date."

"Used to," Kelly said, "As in past tense. It ended a long time ago."

"What happened?" asked Heather. Her tone wasn't nosy or overly sympathetic; it just held the curiosity of a friend, which is probably what prompted Kelly to answer. Heather could get information out of people faster than anyone Payson had ever met.

"Well… we were together for a while when we were both in Denver, and it was really good. He was sweet and shy and awkward, and he didn't buy into any of my crap, and just… I really liked him. He really liked me."

"So why did it end?" Heather asked. Payson knew the reason already. Nicky told her in Dallas, but she thought Kelly needed to say it out loud.

Kelly shrugged. "My mom found out." Heather didn't know about Kelly's home life and was sensitive enough not to ask. "She wouldn't let us see each other anymore, and then he left. And that was it. We didn't talk again until Nastia's party."

Payson knew all of that, but she wanted to know what was happening now. "So what's with all the texting and calling back and forth? I saw you talking in Dallas but you never told me what it was about."

Kelly seemed to be considering her words carefully, so she was slow to speak. "Look, I know this is completely unfair of me, because I drill you about Sasha all the time, but _I _don't even understand what's going on between me and Nick, so I don't think I can explain it to you. All I really know is that I miss him and we're talking. Outside of that… I'm not sure."

"Fair enough," she said, letting the topic slide for now. She still wanted to know, but she understood what it was like to not be ready to talk about something. Kelly usually pushed her until she broke anyway, but the situation was completely different. Payson hadn't been through the trauma that Kelly had, and Nicky seemed to be tied into that somehow.

The conversation moved away from Kelly's love life with no awkwardness at all, because Heather picked up on a slip that neither Kelly nor Payson had noticed. "Sasha? Isn't that your coach?"

"Uhh…" She stalled out, at a complete loss for words. She trusted Heather, but this had never come up between them. Her complicated relationship with Sasha was a secret from everybody but Kelly, and she wasn't sure how much to share.

"Come on, Pay, it's me. You know you can tell me anything."

Heather's words broke her. She was the person that Payson could always vent to about her gymnastics family, because it wouldn't turn in to gym gossip. She _could_ tell her anything. "Alright," she whispered, "Let's just not use his name again, okay? I know this sounds paranoid but I don't want other people to overhear this."

To her credit, Heather rolled with the situation. "Why don't we call him Mr. Big?"

She said it with such complete seriousness that Payson and Kelly couldn't help but laugh. Considering how complicated their lives seemed to be lately, Sex and the City was probably a good analogy.

"Sure, why not? Well, _Big_ and I have a very close friendship, and that's all it is, despite what Kelly thinks, but we still have to keep it a secret. People wouldn't understand; they would think it's something more."

"How close?" Heather asked. Again, she wasn't being nosy. She was just genuinely curious.

She couldn't help but smile when she thought about her friendship with Sasha. It was one of the best things in her life. "He's my best friend. And I'm his. We tell each other everything."

"And they text each other," Kelly added. "All the time. And they call each other every day and have really intense conversations for hours every single night. But they're _just friends_."

Heather stuck up for Payson. "That doesn't mean that they're more than friends. I send her like twenty thousand texts a day, but _I'm_ not in love with her."

"You're not?" Payson's feigned surprise and disappointment had them all giggling. The laughter drew some unwelcome attention.

"What's so funny, Little Miss Sunshine? Did you finally get to look in a mirror and see the ridiculous clothes you're wearing?"

She'd always tried to ignore Morgan's taunts when she was in school here, but when her spine healed she got her attitude back as well. She was done taking crap from Morgan Webster, and Heather had told her just the right gossip to use as a weapon.

She turned around and noted that the snooty girl was surprised to see her. "No, actually, we were laughing about how you failed to make Homecoming Court _again_ this year. But hey, maybe next year. You know what they say, fourth time's a charm."

"It's third time's a charm, Pay, not fourth." Kelly knew nothing about Morgan, but she'd been in enough battles of wit to recognize one when she saw it. She was playing along.

"Ooh," Payson said, pretending to wince. "I'm sorry, Morgan, I guess you're out of luck."

Morgan looked like she'd been slapped in the face, but she was too much of a bitch to back down. "So they finally let you out of your shell, turtle girl? Too bad they didn't give you real clothes while they were at it."

"Yeah, I know my custom made leo is nothing compared to your—" she cast a disparaging look at Morgan's attire "—_lovely_ cheerleading uniform, but it was a birthday gift from Shawn Johnson, so I kind of feel obligated to wear it."

The cheerleader flipped her hair back with an arrogant toss of her head, and Payson knew she'd won. Morgan Webster was about to make a fool of herself in front of everyone. "Please. Are you still living in that deluded world where you think you know something about gymnastics? Leave the tumbling to us _real_ athletes."

Kelly's snickers drew Morgan's attention and she snapped, "What?"

"I'm sorry," Kelly said, getting herself back under control. "Are you Amish?"

It was said with such complete sincerity that there was no way for the question to be taken as an insult. Morgan was shocked into silence for several seconds before she managed to say, "What are you talking about, you freak?"

"You're Amish, right? Like, you don't have electricity. No TV, no internet…"

"Of course I have electricity," she said, looking like a startled rabbit about to flee from danger. She didn't know what to make of Kelly. "My dad is one of the most influential men in this town. I was the first person in the school to have a 50 inch flat screen. _Of course_ we have electricity."

"Oh, so you must be grounded. How long has it been since your parents let you out of your room?"

Morgan stepped back from the table like she was in danger. "You're insane. I don't know what you're babbling on about. Heather, take your psycho friends somewhere else."

Kelly was a picture of innocence. "Well, if you're not Amish and you're not grounded, then you must just be the stupidest person on the planet. How else could you have missed the fact that Payson's the biggest name in gymnastics since… well, _ever_. She's been on every major talk show these past few weeks and her picture is on the cover of every magazine. And then there's the fact that there was a parade thrown in her honor last week, and there's a giant billboard coming into the city that says 'Home of Gymnastics World Champions Payson Keeler and Austin Tucker.' But obviously she's not a _real_ athlete like you are."

Silence reigned over the courtyard. Someone dropped their drink; the thump sounded like a cannon going off and the splash could have been a tsunami hitting land. The quiet lasted for so long that Payson thought time might have stopped. Then Heather's voice cracked through the air and broke the spell. "Oh, I have her issue of People magazine here with me!"

Laughter spread through the crowds as Morgan blindly reached forward to take the magazine from Heather's outstretched hands. On the front was a picture of Payson sporting her five Worlds medals—three golds, a silver, and a bronze. The headline read 'Move Over, Mary Lou.'

Morgan seemed to be in a trance. She stared at the magazine with no comprehension and didn't appear to notice the mocking of her classmates. Then she snapped back into reality and threw the magazine at Heather.

Payson started to feel guilty when the girl ran away in tears. Her mom raised her better than this. It was one thing to take a few digs at her, but to humiliate her in front of so many people… "I think we went too far, guys. We shouldn't have done that."

"Speak for yourself!" Heather cried. "That harpy has terrorized this school for years. She deserves a little payback."

"Heather! I can't believe you just said that." She'd never heard a single unkind word out of Heather's mouth before. "What happened to my sweet, caring, non-judgmental friend?"

"She got tortured by Morgan Webster for twelve years."

Payson couldn't help it. She laughed. For a long time. When she could control herself again, she said, "You two are the best friends in the world. You know that, right?"

* * *

><p>"Mr. Tanner, could I have a word, please?"<p>

Steve dreaded hearing those words from Sasha Belov's lips. They never meant anything good. He remembered thinking, when he first brought Sasha to the Rock, that he would be easy to control. Looking back, Steve couldn't figure out why he'd ever thought something so stupid. He might as well try to control a wild bear for all the good it did him.

He was wary as he made his way to the office. "What can I do for you, Sasha?"

Sasha looked uncomfortable, which surprised Steve. Sasha was a commanding presence, and never more so than when he was in his own office, so it was odd to see hesitance in his manner. "I, uh, I need to discuss something with Lauren, and I think it would be best if you were present for the conversation."

Warning bells were going off in Steve's head. He had a feeling that, whatever Sasha wanted to discuss, he wasn't going to like it. "Just spit it out, Sasha. What's going on here?"

"I need to speak with Lauren about the nature of her beam and floor routines."

He wished that he didn't know what Sasha was talking about, but it was all too clear. He'd had concerns on the issue himself, but he didn't know how to address it. It was the kind of thing mothers should talk to their daughters about, not fathers. He tried to avoid the subject of sex altogether with Lauren, but the results of that method hadn't been too stellar so far. He was impressed that Sasha had the guts to discuss the situation. It was a touchy subject, and he was on thin ice after what happened with Payson. Which was why he needed Steve's presence.

"Sasha," he began, but then halted to organize his thoughts. "I'm glad that you came to me about this before you spoke to Lauren, and I can appreciate the dilemma that you're in here, but I'm not sure that Lauren would be comfortable talking about this with me in the room."

"I understand, and…" Sasha hesitated, too. This was a damn awkward situation to be in. "I would normally ask the girl's mother to sit in for a conversation like this, and I'm at a loss for what to do. I know that Summer is very involved in Lauren's life, but I don't think she would be helpful with this particular problem."

Steve found himself appreciating Sasha's candor. He hated it when people tried to dance around the issue of Leslie being gone, like he would break if they mentioned the fact that Lauren's mother should have filled this role. This was one of the worst parts of being a single father. Lauren needed a mother to discuss these kinds of things with, and Sasha was right about Summer. She was great for Lauren in a lot of ways, but this wasn't one of them. She would make Lauren feel ashamed for putting too much sexuality in her routines.

"Okay, I swear, I'm not trying to shirk my responsibilities as a parent." He'd done that a time or two, and it hadn't turned out very well, so he wanted to make it clear that he was trying to save Lauren from discomfort, not himself. "But do you think that Kim could be here in my place? That way there is a parent in the room, so you're still covered, but Lauren will feel more comfortable to be open."

Sasha frowned and leaned back against the desk. "Would Lauren be okay with that? This is a pretty personal discussion to have in front of someone who isn't family."

"If it was anyone else, no, but she trusts Kim." Kim had been there for Lauren through some pretty tough times, and his daughter had once admitted that Kim was the kind of mother she wished she had.

Sasha was lost in thought, staring at the wall with a blank expression on his face. He muttered two words like he was thinking out loud rather than actually meaning to say them. "You're different…"

He replied without realizing it. "I'm trying to be."

He was. Between what was happening with Kelly and his own daughter's struggles to change, Steve had begun to realize his flaws as a parent. He was seeing a therapist as well now, the same one as Lauren, and was working past the defenses he'd built when Leslie left and the pain that had ripped him apart with her death. It was making him a better man and a better father.

Sasha shook his head, as if to clear it, and pushed off his desk. They had just gotten way to missish for either of their tastes. Sasha's trademark smirk slid back onto his face and Steve squared his shoulders and straitened his back, a silent agreement to pretend like the girly moment never happened. The younger man clapped his hands together and said, "Well, I have an idea that could help with the problem, but it's unconventional and I'm going to need your help."

There was something in the question that made Steve wary. "What kind of help?"

"Money… a lot of money."

* * *

><p>Being called to Sasha's office almost never meant anything good. Most of the time it meant being yelled at. On good days it meant being belittled for a bad decision. Off hand, she couldn't think of a single time she'd left his office feeling good about herself.<p>

He didn't come get her when practice was over. She'd been informed that he wanted to see her, and she was expected to take responsibility and get there. That made it worse, because she had to talk herself into it instead of blindly following his orders. She wished he'd come get her.

"You know, it's only going to get worse if you put it off."

She turned toward the voice, looking for some kind of reassurance. Not that Kelly was likely to give her any. "What do you think he wants?"

"Hell if I know," she said with a snort. "If you want to know what Sasha's thinking ask Payson, not me. She's the one who can read his mind."

People tended to avoid the subject of Payson and Sasha, but Kelly never bothered. It was almost relieving. She and Kaylie tried to pretend like they didn't notice the connection between their friend and coach, but it didn't seem quite so taboo when Kelly said stuff like that, like it was one big joke. "Well, I don't think Payson would appreciate me pulling her off the bars to ask, so I guess I'm going in blind."

"Have you done anything wrong?"

The question threw her for a loop, and she hated that she had to think really hard about the answer. "I don't think so. At least not recently."

Kelly shoved her toward the stairs. "Then you don't have anything to worry about. Stop being a pansy and go talk to him."

Mounting those stairs felt like climbing to the gallows. She was somewhat relieved when she stepped inside the office and saw Kim still at her desk. If he was going to ream her he would ask Kim to leave.

Sasha smiled when he looked up at her, which eased her worry, but she wasn't completely calm. Sometimes Sasha smiled while he was doing sadistic things, like torturing them with conditioning. He motioned her to the couch and rolled the TV in front of her. Kim sat down beside her and he moved a chair in front of them. Lauren was officially confused.

He leaned on his elbows so that he was at eye level with her. "We need to have a talk about your floor and beam routines," he said. "I want to redesign them."

"Okay," she drawled. At least she wasn't in trouble, but she still didn't understand what the hell was going on. "This seems like a big production to tell me that you want to change my routines. What am I missing?"

"If you could use one word to describe your beam, what would it be?"

It wasn't an answer to her question, but hey, she wasn't getting yelled at, so she'd play along. "Umm… awesome?"

A smile quirked at the edge of his lips, but he suppressed it. "If you were talking to your teammates instead of Kim and I, what word would you use then?"

She took a moment to considering and then blushed. She thought she knew what he was getting at. "Sexy."

He nodded but didn't say anything. He swiveled his chair to turn on the TV and cued up a DVD. "I want you to watch a few videos. This is Payson's beam."

It wasn't the same routine she used at Worlds. She hadn't even made the event finals for beam, but she'd upgraded since. Her new DOD was as high as Lauren's. Lauren watched as Payson floated across the beam, doing dance moves that were more difficult than some of Lauren's tumbling and looking gorgeous doing it. In the background of the video several of the boys had stopped to stare at her.

"It's very sensual," Sasha said, snapping her back to reality, "but not at all suggestive. Half the boys in the gym stop to watch when she does this routine, but there isn't a single move that could be considered inappropriate."

A month ago she would have responded with an innuendo. Now she was feeling rather ashamed, so she didn't bother. The video switched to Kaylie. Kaylie's beam wasn't on the same level as Payson's or Lauren's, but it was still very good.

"Now watch Kaylie. She doesn't have your fire, but she gets the crowd engaged. She's America's Sweetheart. They want her to win."

Next was Lauren's routine. At least he didn't put Kelly in the mix. She didn't want to be compared to someone who wasn't even a contender on beam and still come up wanting. Sasha didn't speak again.

She watched the video and suddenly felt ashamed. Seeing it right after Payson and Kaylie's, the difference was obvious. Sasha had used the word suggestive. That's what it was. The moves that she always thought made her look sexy looked… dirty. When the routine was over, Sasha pressed pause and turned to face her. He still didn't speak.

She was humiliated. She couldn't look at him, so she turned her face away, toward Kim. She'd forgotten that Payson's mom was still there, and it was comforting to see Kim with no judgment in her eyes. It was almost like having a mom there to support her. Sometimes she hated Kelly for being adopted in with the Keelers. She'd been wishing Kim Keeler was her mom since she was twelve years old.

"I get it," she said, not making eye contact with either of them. "I've got to change my routines. I'll do whatever you ask me to."

"There's one more thing I want you to watch." Sasha's words shocked her enough to look at him again. She didn't know what else he could want her to see. Was he going to make her watch Kelly after all?

He started the video again and her mouth fell open. It was her routine from the last Open House, when she'd done that hip hop number on the beam. She had no idea why he was showing her this.

"This is the Lauren Tanner I want to see from now on. This was brilliant, Lauren, and the crowd loved it. This can get you Olympic gold."

After the last mortifying video, this one was buoying. It was good to know that Sasha didn't think that she was a complete skank.

"Do you think that gold is really a possibility for me now? I got silver at Worlds, and with Payson's new beam…"

He lifted her chin so that she couldn't look away and said, "You are better than Ivanka and you are better than Payson. You can tell her I said that, too." His eyes crinkled with a smile, probably unaware how much his affection for Payson was coming through in his voice. "If you live up to your potential, you will waltz away with that gold medal. It's yours for the taking."

This meeting had been one of the most embarrassing experiences of her life, but hearing that made the whole thing worth it. Sasha really believed that she would win at the Olympics. "Okay. What do I need to do?"

"I need you here late everyday this week to re-choreograph your floor and beam, and then I have a special training session scheduled for you on Sunday." He was wearing a mysterious smirk, so she didn't bother to ask what was going to happen on Sunday. She knew him well enough to know when it was a lost cause with him.

"Alright. Let's do this."

* * *

><p>Steve didn't know how to act around Summer anymore. They were engaged, and then she dumped him, and then they were engaged again, and then she dumped him again, so he wasn't sure where they stood. How were you supposed to act with your double-ex-fiancé?<p>

He didn't understand what she wanted from him. She said that she didn't want anything to do with him, but she kept seeking him out, just like she was doing now.

"Where's Lauren?" she asked, coming to sit beside him in the observation room while he watched Payson and Kelly working on the beam.

"She's upstairs with Sasha," he answered, uncomfortable with the situation. She was still close with Lauren, but he didn't want to share this particular detail with her. "He needed to talk to her about some changes in her routines."

She frowned. "He's changing her routines? Why? They're so good already."

She'd been involved in the gymnastics world for less than a year, and it bothered him that she thought she was knowledgeable about the sport. He didn't know why. That had never bothered him before. "He thinks that she can add some upgrades, get her up past Ivanka on beam."

"Oh, that's really great. Lauren deserves the gold."

Awkwardness seeped into the tête-à-tête. Steve didn't know what to say. Before he could really think about it, words were coming out of his mouth. "Summer, I owe you an apology."

"It's okay," she said, reaching out to squeeze his hand. "I've forgiven you. I understand that you were trying to protect Lauren."

"No, that's not what I meant." The confusion was clear on her face. "I owe you an apology about us. I've thought about this a lot lately, and I wasn't fair to you."

"I don't understand."

"I…" This was going to hurt Summer, and he didn't want to do that, but he needed her to understand. This would give them both closure. "I'm still in love with my wife, Summer. I never stopped being in love with her."

She pulled away as if she'd been slapped. "What? But… but she was a drug addict."

"She made mistakes," he admitted, "But that's what a marriage is about, right? Loving someone even when they make mistakes. She hurt me, and she hurt Lauren, but that doesn't mean that either of us ever stopped loving her or missing her."

"So… so what does this have to do with me?"

"I wanted to forget Leslie, and you were as different from her as it was possible to be. I thought that if I made myself love you then I could stop loving her, and that wasn't fair to you. You deserve a man who loves you for _you_, and I couldn't do that. I'm so sorry, Summer."

"You didn't love me." She stood up and stepped back, trying to distance herself from him. Her eyes were tearing. "Then why did you _propose_? Why did you want to marry me if you didn't love me?"

His guilt slammed into him. He'd made a lot of mistakes, and so many of them revolved around Summer. "I don't have a good answer for you, Summer. I know what I did was wrong. I'm trying to make it right now, as much as I can, by telling you the truth, to help you move on. You deserve to know why this didn't work between us."

"You thought that this would help me?" she cried. On the other side of the glass, Payson and Kelly turned to look at them. "You thought that it would help to tell me that you were using me? You thought that it would _help_ to say that you would rather be with a drug addict than me?"

She bent down to pick up her designer bag, wiping tears from her eyes, but before she stood she said, "You've blamed Leslie for ruining your life for so long, Steve, but maybe you should take a long look at yourself. You've ruined lives, too."

She stormed out of the viewing area and he dropped his head into his hands. That hadn't gone well, but he didn't know if there was any way that it could have gone better. It was a horrible conversation to have and there was no easy way to do it.

She would appreciate it eventually. She couldn't live the rest of her life wondering about their relationship. Now she would be free to live the rest of her life. She would appreciate it… eventually.

* * *

><p>AN: FINALLY! I'm so excited to be back in this story again! I'm very passionate about this story and it was killing me that I wasn't getting anywhere on it lately, so I'm glad to have inspiration again :)

So what's your guess as to Sasha's secret training for Lauren? Remember, he does really unorthodox things.

Payson and Lauren are getting inside Sasha and Steve's heads. I love the man-up moment when they realize they are being missish. (Also, I love the word missish.)

And Summer is being hypocritical again… She didn't love him, but she thinks he's horrible for not loving her. Classic Summer.


	12. Chapter 12

A/N: About a year ago I started this fic. A few months after that my brain got hijacked by the monster that turned into Amor Fati and I couldn't get free. But now Amor Fati is finished and my mind has been set free again! Time for more Mother Knows Best!

* * *

><p>"Daddy, where are you going? The Rock is the other way."<p>

"We're not going to the Rock," he said. He was grinning, something that Steve Tanner almost never did, and Lauren got even more confused than she was.

She had some kind of special training today with Sasha and, despite her best efforts, she still didn't know what it was. Her dad and Sasha had been tight lipped about it all week.

"So if we're not going to the Rock, where _are_ we going?" She was about to find out anyway, but that didn't stop her for snooping. It more fun if she managed to wrangle it out of her dad.

His grin got even bigger and he answered, "Denver."

"Like Denver Elite?" she asked, completely confused. She didn't know what to do with that information.

"Nope."

No matter how hard she tried or how sneaky she was, she couldn't get any more answers from her dad. Which is why she was so surprised when the pulled up in front of a big industrial building, with no apparent connection to gymnastics. What the hell was going on?

Sasha was standing outside the door with another man and… were they smoking?

He waved them over. When they got close enough to smell the smoke, Lauren said, "You know, Payson would kill you if she knew you were smoking."

Her dad glared at her and she felt a wave of guilt wash over her. This was the kind of thing she was supposed to stop. She shouldn't be making veiled implications that Payson was Sasha's girlfriend, especially not since he was trying to help her.

Sasha totally didn't help, though. He winked at her and said, "Well, it's a good thing she isn't here then, isn't it?"

For what was probably the millionth time, Lauren wondered if Sasha had any idea how the things he said came off. The guy with him got it though, because he asked, "You've got a girl now, Sasha? I never thought I'd see the day when you settled down."

"What?" he asked, and then it must have sank in, because he blushed a little. "Oh, no. What I have is a seventeen year old mother hen. Payson's one of my gymnasts. Takes after her mum, bosses everybody around."

It was a joke, but there was a little bit too much affection in his voice when he said it. Seriously, she was trying to be better here, but it was hard when he made himself such an easy target. There was no way she was imagining this.

Sasha changed the subject. "Lauren, this is my friend Teren Oddo. Teren, this is Lauren Tanner."

He was cute, probably a few years younger than Sasha, with dark hair and a deep tan. He was a total contrast to Sasha's fair skin and blonde hair. She shook hands with him and Sasha added, "Teren's a photographer."

"Okay. I'm not getting it."

The guy, Teren, answered. "I'm in town shooting the cover art for The Fray's next album, and Sasha asked me to stick around and do a shoot with you, too."

"Seriously?" She hated the way her voice squeaked when she said that, but this was freaking awesome. A photo shoot? With the guy who did the photography for The Fray? This wasn't Max standing around in her living room taking pictures of her in a bikini. This was the real deal. "Can I call the other girls to come, too?"

She had no idea where that came from. This was her special day, she should be keeping it all to herself, but the first thought that popped into her head was that Kelly would love this, and after everything the other gymnast had done for her, Lauren kind of owed her one.

A look passed between Sasha and her dad that she didn't understand, but she didn't really care, either. There was too much other stuff going on for her to pay attention to whatever was going on between a couple of middle aged men.

As soon as she got the okay she whipped out her phone to call her teammates. In the background she heard her dad ask about getting a cigar, but she ignored him.

She tapped her foot impatiently until the phone picked up. "Oh my God, Kelly, you're not going to _believe_ where I am."

o-O-o

Sasha's plan was going brilliantly. He hated to sound like a psychiatrist, even in his own head, but he suspected that much of Lauren's behavior stemmed from one hell of an inferiority complex. She was never the best at anything except beam, and she spent her days side by side with Kaylie, who boys seem to fawn over, and Payson, who is incredibly beautiful. Payson might not know how gorgeous she is, but there was no way that Lauren had missed it. It was natural that Lauren would seek out a niche for herself. He just wished that niche hadn't been 'the slutty one.'

The idea of the photo shoot was for Lauren to feel beautiful rather than sexy, and she had a team of make up artists and stylists making that happen. Steve had handed Sasha a no-limit credit card and said to do whatever was needed, so Lauren was going to get the ultimate experience. What surprised Sasha was that she wanted to share that experience with her friends.

It was beyond his wildest expectations for the day. Something had changed in Lauren, and he wasn't sure when or how it happened. He didn't know if it started at Worlds, when Payson challenged Lauren to earn her trust, or when Kelly befriended Lauren while the rest of the gym shunned her.

His thoughts came to an abrupt halt when Lauren walked out of the makeshift dressing room. He thought back to her hijacked dress at the Rock's fashion show; this woman wasn't even the same person. Instead of a too short, too revealing dress, she was dressed in a pale blue ball gown that trailed on the ground behind her, with her hair falling in a mass of curls across her shoulders. The change that was more striking than the clothes, though, was the smile. She looked so happy.

She picked up her skirt and twirled around, saying, "This is so great! I feel like a princess."

"You look like a princess," Sasha said. And she did.

Steve was staring at her in awe. "You look like your mom."

Sasha wasn't sure how that statement would be accepted, but Lauren didn't seem to be upset. She looked rather like she didn't know what to feel at the moment. Steve seemed to realize that he might not have said the right thing and added, "You look beautiful, Lauren. Absolutely beautiful."

That had the desired effect. She smiled even wider and ran to her dad to give him a hug. "Thank you, daddy." Then she reached out to hug Sasha and said, "Thank you, too. I can't believe you did this for me."

Teren guided her over to where his equipment was set up, and Sasha and Steve watched the pictures on the computer monitor while they worked. Every few pictures Steve would say, "I want a copy of that one," and one in particular made Sasha say, "_I _want a copy of that one. We're going to hang that up in the Rock." She was spinning again, and Teren managed to capture Lauren while she was laughing and her skirt was swirling around her.

Lauren had worked her way through a couple more dresses by the time the other girls arrived, although the first was Sasha's favorite. Kelly, Payson, and Kelly walked into the warehouse to find Lauren having a ball dressed in a perfect replica of an Audrey Hepburn dress à la _Sabrina_. Lauren waved them over and Sasha was pleased to see that the other three girls met her with exclamations of how wonderful Lauren looked. They seemed intent on keeping Lauren's special day about her.

Sasha introduced them all to Teren and then Lauren pulled Kaylie back to the dressing room to get a dress of her own while Kelly and Payson stayed behind. Teren, intent on getting Sasha in trouble, said to Payson, "So you must be the mother hen I heard about earlier."

Payson turned to Sasha with an arched brow and a dangerous lilt to her voice. "Mother hen?"

"Yeah, he said you bossed everybody around. Lauren seemed to think that you'd be upset that he was smoking."

"You were _smoking_?" she asked, managing to sound even more dangerous. He was more than a little frightened.

"I had a cigar," he defended. "Cigars don't count as smoking."

Payson opened her mouth, but Kelly jerked her away before she had a chance to say anything. Sasha heard Kelly hiss, "Stop acting like you're his—" She stepped too far away for him to hear the rest of the sentence, but he had a hunch that the last word was 'girlfriend.'

"Dude, you are so whipped," Teren said.

"I am _not_ whipped."

"No, you definitely are. You're wrapped around her finger. Just tell me you're not stupid enough to be sleeping with her."

Sasha flushed with indignation. At least, that's how he preferred to think of it, because he refused to admit that he was embarrassed. "I'm not sleeping with her, because we are _not_ involved. I'm her coach. That's it."

"Uh huh, sure."

Sasha was glad that Steve, or anyone else for that matter, was out of hearing range. The last thing he needed was more fuel for the rumors that were already stirring. Teren wasn't the kind to go spreading gossip, though, so Sasha didn't bother arguing. Acting defensive wouldn't help the situation.

The girls were back with hair and make up for a long time. When they came out, Sasha noticed two things immediately: Kelly had a brilliant smile to match Lauren's, and Payson was looking unintentionally sexy.

Kelly was no stranger to photo shoots, but this was something different altogether. For one, her mother wasn't there to belittle her, and for another, she looked like the teenager she was rather than the adult that Sheila always forced her to be. The day was meant to be about Lauren, but perhaps Kelly could benefit from it, too.

Payson… He couldn't take his eyes off her. The stylist had obviously tweaked dresses meant for Lauren to fit the other girls, and Payson was wearing Lauren's Audrey Hepburn dress. It looked completely different on her. Payson's different shape changed everything. The top stretched tight over her chest and the bows on the shoulders had been let out and tied again, showing much more of her shoulders; the skirt hugged her hips before falling down in folds; and it came to just above her knees instead of just below them. What was sweet and kitschy on Lauren was glamorous and sexy on Payson.

This was a problem.

It was bad enough that he noticed how beautiful Payson was. He couldn't bring the word sexy into play. If he went there it was too easy to go other, dangerous places. The problem was that it was hard not to notice the way she looked. He could deal with it for one day when she had stylists working to make her as beautiful as possible, but it was harder to justify the way he felt when she was a sweaty mess after they ran together. If Sasha was honest with himself, he was more attracted to Payson than he had ever been to any other woman. It was his misfortune that his best friend, the most important person to him in the world, also happened to be his perfect type.

While Teren photographed Kaylie, Payson came and sat beside Sasha. She laid her hand on his arm and said, "This was a great idea, Sasha. I've never seen Lauren so happy."

"You know, I'm really proud of you," he said, "of the way you're handling everything with Lauren." He knew, of course, all the details of how things changed with the team that night at gymnastics camp, but it was still very big of Payson to forgive Lauren. They had a similar group experience before Nationals, but it had ended with Kaylie and Lauren hating each other.

Payson shrugged off the praise. "Kelly was right, is all. If I could forgive her for everything that she's done, then I should be able to forgive Lauren, too."

"I'm proud of you for Kelly too," he said. "You've been a good friend to her when she really needed one."

She smiled and then directed the conversation away from herself. She nodded to where Kaylie was posing in front of the camera. "She looks really great, doesn't she?"

"She looks like cotton candy," he joked, "but it works for her." Kaylie was wearing a big pink ball of fluff that was three times as big as she was, but it really did work for her. She was sitting on the ground with the dress pooled around her and looking like she was buried in a mound of pink snow, and Sasha decided that he wanted a picture of that to hang in the Rock as well. Then there was another to follow of Kelly tossing a handful of confetti in the air, and one of Payson wearing a mischievous smile with her hands held over her heart and one high heeled foot popped up in the air. In the end Sasha asked Teren for large copies of all four to place in the Rock's lobby, and then a candid one of the girls wearing their normal clothes and having a fight with Kelly's confetti.

Several hours later, when the shoot was over, the four girls sat together laughing over some shared joke. A week ago he wouldn't have thought this possible. A few months ago he would have institutionalized anyone who suggested such a scene. Now it seemed natural. Maybe what was missing before was Kelly, because Sasha was pretty sure that any three of the group together wouldn't work without the fourth.

Payson, as she had several times throughout the day, cast her eyes toward Sasha. She wanted to share the joke with him, and would on the phone later, but for now she flashed her beautiful smile for him. That smile was one of the things he loved most about her—

Love? _Love._

This was a big, big problem.

* * *

><p>AN: This was such a difficult first chapter to come back to. This is essentially a story about Kelly, but it so happened that the plan for this chapter gave Kelly only a cameo, so it was hard to get out of AF mode and back into MKB mode. Next chapter should be much more Kelly-centric :)

There are some new pics from this chapter on my pinterest.


	13. Chapter 13

A/N: I'm writing as I go with this story, so updates obviously aren't going to come as fast as they did with AF. The upside of that is that there are actual chapters for this story rather than the endless flow that AF was ;)

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><p>Payson was supposed to be watching Lauren vault. What she was really doing was watching Kelly help Kaylie with her bars set.<p>

Things with Kelly were great. She fit into the group like the last piece of a jigsaw puzzle, and the rest of the girls banded together to help her deal with the ever-present consequences of Sheila's abuse. The main repercussion they were dealing with right now was physical more than emotional, but even that had feelings of bitterness and betrayal attached to it. Her ankle was giving her trouble, and Sasha benched her. All she was allowed to do was watch and give tips while the others practiced. She dealt with the restriction better than Payson thought she would. All of her anger was directed toward her mother for allowing the injury to go untreated for so long, and she actually seemed thankful that Sasha cared enough to take care of her.

There was less tension with Lauren, too. There was a sense of—not trust, not yet, but perhaps gratitude. Gratitude on Payson's side that Lauren was making an effort to change, and gratitude on Lauren's side that Payson was giving her a second chance. They got along better than they ever had before, because as much as Payson hated to admit it, she used to look down on Lauren. Payson was beginning to realize that she was a bit of a snob before she broke her back. If Lauren had an inferiority complex, then Payson had a superiority complex. Now they were trying to meet somewhere in the middle.

The only hitch in their group was Kaylie. She was still uncomfortable around Payson and wouldn't talk about it to clear the air. There was no way for Payson to breach the subject that wouldn't come off as egotistical.

Winning Nationals was the worst thing that could ever have happened to Kaylie. In Kaylie's mind, being the National Champion meant that she had to be the best from then on, but she knew deep down that she wasn't. She was _one_ of the best, but not _the_ best, and Payson dreaded the day that Kaylie went head to head with Payson and Kelly for the first time since Nationals.

Lauren came to stand beside Payson and contemplated Kaylie, too. "I feel guilty about my vault," Lauren admitted.

"You can't do that, Lo. You can't hold yourself back because you're afraid of hurting someone else's feelings."

"Yeah, that's what my shrink said. I'm not going to hold back… I just don't want her to get hurt."

Part of Sasha's plan for Lauren was to make her a dual specialist on beam and vault. Having two great events would increase her chance of making the Olympic team, and vault was the perfect apparatus for a small, compact gymnast like Lauren. The problem was that vault was Kaylie's specialty, too. Making the very likely assumption that Payson would be a medal contender on every apparatus, that put Lauren and Kaylie in close competition for the second U.S. spot in the finals. The two-per-country rule _sucked_.

"Sasha's going to groom her to be a floor contender," Payson confided. "It's her best shot at an individual medal the way things stand right now. But we've got almost two years to go, so who knows what's going to happen before then? Any one of us might be out of the game."

"Wow, Pay, way to be optimistic."

Payson was saved from making a response by Austin inserting himself into the conversation. "This is the most boring party I've ever planned."

It was a continuation of a discussion they'd been having for days. Kelly's birthday was the next day, and Austin thought they should throw a blowout party to celebrate. Payson and Kaylie were insistent that the last thing Kelly would want right now was the attention of dozens of people she didn't know. Instead they were having a very low-key gathering at Austin's house with just the girls, Austin, and Max. They thought about inviting Nicky, but they decided that it might put too much pressure on the almost-couple to make such a dramatic gesture after only a few weeks of texting and calling.

"Deal with it, Austin," Payson said. "If you can't have fun sitting around with four hot girls, that's your problem."

In the end, Austin did enjoy himself. They watched movies and Austin and Max taunted the girls with junk food. It turned out that Austin and Kelly had a mutual love of Vin Diesel movies, so they had a _Fast and Furious_ marathon. It was going great until Max made a slightly drunken toast to the birthday girl.

"Happy birthday to the _second_ best gymnast in the country." He sent a significant look toward Payson, obviously implying that she was the first best. But while Max was looking at Payson, Payson was looking at Kaylie.

She didn't seem surprised or heartbroken, but the smile did slip off her face for a few seconds before she recovered her composure. A few minutes later she left for the bathroom.

Payson wasn't the only one who noticed. Austin had seen too, and he made up a lame excuse about getting more popcorn to go after her. What he didn't expect was for Payson to say, "I'll help," and follow him.

He was forced to go to the kitchen since Payson was tagging alone, but once they were alone he said, "You know I didn't come to make popcorn, Payson. I need to talk to Kaylie."

"And I need to talk to _you_, so shut up and listen. Kaylie has to learn to deal with this on her own."

"Deal with what exactly, Payson?"

She glared at him. He knew as well as she did what the problem was. "With the fact that she's not the best anymore! You know that I love Kaylie. She's one of my best friends, but she can't expect us to walk around on eggshells for her. She has to deal with the fact that Kelly and I are better than her."

"Kelly _isn't_ better than her. Kaylie beat her at Nationals, remember?" Austin wasn't blind enough to miss the fact that Kaylie's all around was nowhere near as strong as Kelly's anymore, but he didn't know the whole truth.

"Look, nobody else knows this and nobody else is _going_ to know about it, okay?" She waited until he agreed before she continued. "Kelly was injured at Nationals. I saw her getting a cortisone shot."

Austin was halfway between angry and desolate. "You're saying that Kaylie shouldn't have won Nationals?"

"No, I'm not. I'm just saying that Nationals was one day out of hundreds. She hasn't competed against either of us since then, and she's never competed against Ivanka. She almost killed herself trying to be the best once, what do you think is going to happen if she doesn't deal with this before she has to face the truth?"

"That's why she needs help," he insisted.

"I get it Austin. You're a fixer. You see something wrong and you want to make it better. That's not a bad thing, and it's going to make you a great coach someday—"

He cut her off before she could finish. "I'm not going to coach. Ever."

"Yeah, well, that's what I said, too." Sasha saw the truth in her long before she realized she loved coaching, and she could see it in Austin. She meant what she said. He would be a great coach someday. "But what I was trying to say is that you can't fix people. She has to fix herself, so stop trying to save her and let her do it herself."

Payson left him alone to think rather than push him further. Much like Kaylie, he needed to figure this out for himself. She went back to where the others were still watching movies and sat down next to Kelly. She slipped both arms around her friend's waist and rested her head on Kelly's shoulder. Lauren did the same on Kelly's other side so that they were wrapped together in a hug. After a few minutes Kaylie came back to the living room and wrapped her arms around Payson, making their group complete.

o-O-o

"…Happy birthday, dear Kelly, happy birthday to you!"

Becca's voice was louder than Payson, Kim, and Mark's combined, but she was also the best singer, so nobody minded.

Kelly was glowing. Celebrating your birthday with a group of friends who love you was wonderful, and it was the first time that Kelly ever got to experience that, but it couldn't compare to celebrating with family. For the first time since her dad died, Kelly actually had family to celebrate with.

She blew out the candles on what Becca called a cake-less cake, something so healthy that it could barely be considered desert, but Kelly didn't seem to care.

Becca made a face when she took her first bite and said, "Bleh, this is horrible. I don't know why I'm choosing to live a life that makes me eat stuff like this."

"Don't insult my birthday cake," Kelly said, giving Becca a playful kick in the leg. "It's the first one I've ever had and it's wonderful."

There was a very short awkward pause before Mark said, "Becca's not wrong. Can't us adults have some ice cream to go along with our non-cake?"

That was the way it worked in the Keeler house. Every once in a while Kelly would say something that horrified them all, there would be a few seconds of loaded silence, and then the conversation would continue as normal. Kelly never noticed. Her life had been so full of neglect that she didn't even know she said something out of the ordinary. Rather than making a big deal out of it, the Keelers focused on making sure that it never happened again.

When the party was over, they got to do something else that was new to Kelly: girl talk. The three girls put on pajamas and piled onto Kelly's tiny bed and talked about everything under the sun.

"Okay, I've got one," Becca said, "Who was your first kiss?"

It was the truth side of truth or dare. Someone asked a question, and then they all had to answer it. Payson groaned. She didn't particularly want to answer this question. "Come on, Becs, ask something else."

"Why, was it Sasha?" Kelly asked.

"No." She buried her head in the pillow to muffle her answer. "It was Nicky."

Kelly sat in stunned silence until Payson lifted her head back up, and then, "Oh my God, you totally macked on my boyfriend!"

She grabbed another pillow and hit Payson in the face with it, inciting an all out pillow fight. It lasted for nearly a half hour before they knocked a bunch of trophies off a shelf and decided they should stop before they broke something. They collapsed back onto the bed, and Payson managed to squeeze words out between her laughs. "So Nicky's your boyfriend now?"

"No. Yes. I'm not really sure."

"Well let us know when you figure that out, huh? But now it's your turn to answer the question. Who was your first kiss?"

"I don't want to talk about it."

Payson could tell by now when Kelly just needed to be cajoled a little bit and when they really needed to drop the subject. This was the later, so Payson turned the question on Becca instead. "So what about you, Becs? You know the rules, we all have to answer."

Payson was sixteen, nearly seventeen, when she got her first kiss, but Becca was much more social, so Payson wasn't surprised that her little sister had already been kissed. Becca's face was on fire. "It was Jeremy Stewart, from the gym."

"Jeremy is two years older than you!" Payson cried. Kelly elbowed Payson in the stomach, and her message couldn't have been clearer. A two year age difference was nothing compared to a thirteen year age difference.

Kelly turned the tables. "Okay Payson, here's a question for you: who would you rather sleep with, Austin or Sasha?"

"Woah, wait a minute, when did we bring sex into this discussion? This is supposed to be questions like 'what would you bring with you to a deserted island,' not 'who would you sleep with.'"

"Well I'm the birthday girl and I make the rules. Answer the question."

Payson was going to commit murder. The question was bad enough, but her little sister was there with them. She wasn't going to answer, but the other two glared her down. "Fine! It would be Sasha. Are you happy?"

"Yes," Kelly said. "Now you, little Keeler. Austin or Sasha?"

Becca didn't miss a beat. "Definitely Austin."

Payson buried her head in her pillow again. "I don't want to hear stuff like that from my baby sister."

Neither of the other girls acknowledged her. Becca said, "Okay, Kelly, now it's your turn."

That made Payson sit up. She was so embarrassed about answering the question herself that she forgot Kelly had to answer it. Judging by Kelly's blush, she forgot, too.

"I don't know," she said. "I just said it to mess with Payson."

"But now you have to answer," Payson said. She wasn't going to let Kelly off the hook after what she just did. "Becca had to answer the first kiss question, so you have to answer this one."

"I hate you… Okay, I guess Austin."

Payson was a little surprised. "Seriously, I'm the only one who would choose Sasha? Have you guys _seen_ him?"

"Have you _noticed_ the fact that he's thirty?" Kelly threw back at her. "He's hot, but so is Austin, and Austin is seven years younger."

"We're changing the subject now," Payson said, and the jumped in with a new, completely non-boy related question before Becca or Kelly said something else embarrassing.

Becca was sleeping in their room, so Payson had to wait until Becca and Kelly fell asleep spooned together before she sneaked out to call Sasha. When he answered the first thing she said was, "Apparently you're not as hot as Austin."

She told him the whole story, and was surprised (and a little disturbed) to find that she was more comfortable telling Sasha that she would sleep with him rather than Austin than she had been saying the same thing to her sisters. Kelly might be right. Payson and Sasha's relationship was weird.

Sasha was being weird, too. Something was bothering him and Payson didn't know what. She asked him, of course, and he admitted that something was going on but that, as much as he hated it, he couldn't tell her. She trusted him so she didn't push, but she would if she needed to. If this, whatever it was, didn't get better, she was going to figure out how to help.

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><p>AN: So what's bothering Sasha? Anyone? Anyone? Bueller?


	14. Chapter 14

A/N: B and anam were on the nose for last chapter's question, and one of Kiwiflea's two guesses was correct. You'll have to go look at their answers in the reviews to find out for yourselves :) This chapter is long, as will be the next one.

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><p>Payson rarely worried when she was called into Sasha's office. More times than not he just wanted to talk to her about some change in her routine, or every once in a while he asked her to coach an evening class because Tara's baby was sick or some such. Very rarely was she in trouble.<p>

When the four of them got called in together, though, she was a little nervous. She couldn't think of anything they did wrong recently, but there could be something she was forgetting.

Kim left when they came in, which made her even more nervous, but Sasha was smiling. "Have a seat, ladies," he said. "There's something I'd like to discuss with you."

He waited for them to sit before he continued. "I've just got off the phone with Valeri Liukin. He's asked the Rock team to come compete in an invitational against WOGA two weeks from now."

Lauren asked the question they were all wondering. "Why?"

The Rock was the best club in the nation. They had four of the six members from the World Championship team, each of them with at least one individual medal, and in particular they had Payson. The gymnastics world was terrified of her right now. Sasha had been trying to set up an invitational for a couple of weeks and nobody was brave enough to compete against them.

Payson would swear that Sasha rolled his eyes. "I don't know, Lauren. Maybe they have a new gymnast to debut. Maybe they want to show the gymnastics community that they've got guts. Maybe this really is a friendly competition between two gyms. I don't care why. I care that it's the perfect opportunity to debut one of _our_ new gymnasts."

There was only one person he could be talking about. "Do you really think she's ready?"

"I do. She's not top form yet, but she needs to get some experience under her belt before she competes at a national level. I want her in as many events as we can manage between now and the Classic."

The others caught on. "Becca's coming with us? That so awesome."

"It is," Sasha said. Payson tried not to laugh at how serious he sounded. "I'm sure you all remember your first meet as an elite gymnast, right?"

They all nodded. The first time competing as an elite was an even bigger deal than the first time competing at all. Payson had been alone for hers, because she was the only elite at her gym in Minnesota. It was the meet that qualified her to the Classic, and from there to Nationals and onto the National Team. Shortly after that she moved to the Rock, because her old coach said that he didn't have enough experience to train her the way she needed. She would never forget how proud he was after that first meet, though. Memories like that stuck with you forever.

The others were as lost in memories as Payson, but Sasha brought them back to the present. "It's up to you four to make this experience special for her. It's easy to get overshadowed in this gym, so I'd like you to make this invitational all about Becca."

"Done," said Kelly. "We'll make sure she has the best meet of her life. This is going to be way more fun than if it was about us."

Payson took having a little sister for granted, but Kelly, who never had anything close to a sibling relationship, loved her role as a big sister. She would have a blast at the invitational.

He sent them back to work and didn't mention WOGA again until the day was wrapping up. He stood in the middle of the floor and hollered, "Becca, Jenny, Alicia, Sarah, Kaylie, Kelly, Lauren, and Payson, on the floor now!"

The eight girls—three juniors, five seniors—jogged to stand around him while the rest of the gym looked on. Once they were all there, Sasha said, "I spoke with Valeri Liukin this morning, and the Rock has been invited to compete with WOGA two weeks from now. I have chosen the eight of you to travel to Dallas to represent our gym. Jenny and Sarah, you will be our alternates. The rest of you will make up our competitive team."

Payson like the way he did that. Rather than announcing Becca and Alicia, both juniors, as part of the team, he let them have a moment of surprise as they figured it out themselves. The two girls screeched out at the same time, "Seriously!?"

Sasha didn't bother to hide his smile. "Yes seriously. And I expect you to practice hard and prove that I made the right decision in placing you on this team."

They promised they would and he dismissed them all. Becca couldn't talk about anything else on the ride home, nor did they expect her to. This would be a competition that she remembered for the rest of her life, and the Rebels were going to make it amazing for her.

o-O-o

Payson had very few 'dates' with Max. They spent a lot of time together, but their friends were almost always around. They usually had to sneak away to be alone together.

Austin was taking advantage of a particularly nice day to have a barbeque, meaning that he was outside barbequing in the chilly air while the rest of them watched through the kitchen doors as Austin made a fool of himself. Inside, Kaylie, Kelly, and Lauren were trapped in a heated debate about eyeliner (Payson didn't understand her friends), and for once nobody was paying much attention to Payson and Max. They never wasted an opportunity like that, so Max took her hand and led her away from the party.

As soon as the door closed the door to his bedroom he covered her mouth with his. They didn't always make out when they came to his room, but she certainly didn't mind when they did. She really liked kissing Max, even if he didn't make her skin tingle they way being near Sasha did. It was nice to be a normal boyfriend and girlfriend for a while.

She didn't really notice when they moved to the bed, and she didn't care when he laid her back against the mattress and settled on top of her. It was nothing they hadn't done before. She did notice when he slid his hand lower on her body. She put her hand over his and placed it back on her waist.

It wasn't that she didn't like it or that it felt wrong; it just didn't feel _right_. It was like that a lot with Max. Something just felt a little bit off with them, but most times she ignored it. She didn't ignore it when he slipped his hand under her shirt, though. Just like before, she moved his hand back to where she wanted it and dropped the issue.

When his hand touched bare skin again a few minutes later, she decided that the issue couldn't be dropped. She pushed him off of her and said, "Max, stop. Can't you take a hint?"

"Relax, Payson. It's not that big of a deal," he said. He was trying to comfort her, obviously thinking that she was just nervous about doing something new. "We've been together almost two months. I got farther with Lauren in two days."

She stared at him in shock. "Wow, that was a real asshole thing to say. Was that your idea of being a good boyfriend?"

He flopped down on his back and heaved a sigh. "I'm sorry, Pay. I shouldn't have said that. I'm just frustrated. I've waited a long time for you and I don't understand what the problem is here. You say you love me but you're not acting like it."

She couldn't quite meet his eyes when she said, "I—I don't think I do."

Max popped up like a jack-in-the-box. "What do you mean you don't think you do? You don't think you love me?"

"I thought I did when I said it, but I think I was wrong. If I loved you, you would be the first person I called if I was upset or excited. You're not even the fifth. I should be able to tell you anything; you should be the person that I think about more than anyone else during the day; you should be the person that I trust most in the whole world. You're not any of those things. I don't—I don't love you. And you don't love me. If you did, you wouldn't be pushing me to do something that I don't want to do."

The words came spilling out of her mouth before she even realized what she was saying. Max listened to it all and then said, "Payson, you're living in a fairytale world. You're talking about an ideal. It doesn't actually exist."

"Yes it does," she whispered. If that was what love was—"Oh God, yes it does."

She was hyperventilating. There were only two thoughts in Payson's mind, the most urgent of which was that she had to get outside so that she could breathe. She fled from Max's room and back through the house, grabbing Kelly's hand as she rushed through the kitchen and out onto the porch. Austin was thankfully inside for to moment, but she dragged Kelly farther into the yard anyway, far enough away that nobody could hear them.

She sucked air into her lungs and gasped, "Oh my God, Kelly, I'm in love with Sasha!"

"Well, duh."

Payson was so far past reason that she couldn't acknowledge her friend's glib response. Tears were streaming down her face and she wasn't sure if she was crying or if her eyes were watering from her lack of clean air. She dropped to her knees while she tried to breathe, and Kelly sat down beside her to count out breaths until she was free from her hyperventilation.

When she could breathe again, Payson realized that she was, in fact, crying. "Oh God, I've ruined everything. He's the most wonderful thing in my life and I ruined it by falling in love with him."

"Payson, it's not like this just suddenly happened," Kelly said, rubbing her hands in comforting circles on Payson's back. "You've loved him for ages. This doesn't change anything."

Payson knew she would get an 'I told you so' from Kelly later, but she appreciated her friend's seriousness for now. "It changes everything, Kelly. I can't pretend like this isn't there. How can I be around him every day knowing that I love him and he doesn't love me?"

Kelly was exasperated. "I don't know how the two of you can be such idiots. He's in love with you, too, Payson! It's so obvious that I can't believe the whole world hasn't noticed. You have no idea what you look like when you're together."

"What do you mean?" Payson sniffled. She tried to wipe away her tears with the back of her hand.

"Okay, I know you're not big on the lovey-dovey crap—which is totally there between you, by the way—so I'll go with the Discovery Channel version. He stands really close to you. Whenever he talks to you, his voice is lower than it is when he talks to the rest of us. His eyes dilate when he looks at you, and before you ask, yes, I did watch specifically for that. He touches you… well, all over the place, really. When it's just the three of us in the gym, you guys are touching ninety percent of the time, and he's put his hands in places on your body that he never would with the rest of us."

Payson blushed, but not at Kelly's words. She was remembering something that even Kelly didn't know about. One night when Kelly was at physical therapy, Payson and Sasha were trying to fix some minute detail in her back attitude, and Sasha's hands had ended up in some very intimate places. What was worse than his hands, perhaps, was the position of their bodies. He was pressed against her back while one of her legs, held in an attitude behind her, was essentially wrapped around him. He must have realized how they were standing, though, because he stepped back so quickly that she almost fell over.

Kelly was still talking. "And then there is the sheer amount of time he spends with you. You're together every moment that you can pull off, and sometimes at night you talk for two or three hours. No guy talks to a friend for three hours. He's in love with you, Payson. I don't know when it started, but I know it's been a long time. He's your lobster."

Payson was confused enough to stop crying. "What does that even mean, Kelly?"

"Geez, don't you ever watch _Friends_? Lobsters mate for life, and he's your lobster! Trust me, Payson. He's in love with you."

"I'm not saying I believe you," Payson said, "but even if you're right, what difference does it make? He's still my coach."

"When the hell has the ever stopped you?"

Payson made a strange mixture of a laugh and a sob. "I don't know if I love you or I hate you, Kelly." She curled into a ball and rested her head on her knees, and admitted. "I don't know what to do."

"For now you go inside and have dinner with your friends. Tonight you call Sasha just like you do every night. After that… we'll see what happens."

Payson nodded, wiped away her tears again, and started to stand, but Kelly said, "Wait. You were with Max before you came running out here, so what happened? They're going to think that's what this is about and I need to know."

Payson told her everything, starting with kissing Max and ending with her revelation that her description of love was an exact description of her relationship with Sasha. For a few minutes during the tale, Payson was legitimately concerned that Kelly would harm Max. She had never seen Kelly so angry as when she described Max's attempts to take things farther. Payson wouldn't let them go back inside until Kelly calmed down.

Austin, Kaylie, and Lauren were watching through the glass doors, and Austin opened the door for them as soon as they stepped onto the porch. He was worried. "What happened?" he asked. "Max just stormed out of here without saying a word. Did you guys have a fight?"

"What happened," Kelly bit off, "was that your douchebag friend just tried to force himself on Payson."

"It wasn't like that," Payson said. Her hollow voice didn't do much to argue her point, even though it had nothing to with Max. "He was a little too persistent, but that's it. Nothing more."

"It was nothing more because you _made_ him stop," Kelly said. "I don't care how far he went with it; if you had to push him off of you he went too far."

"Kelly, please don't—"

Austin cut her off. "No, she's right, Payson. Any decent guy stops when a girl wants him to. If he pressured you then he's out of here. I don't want him in my house."

Payson didn't know what to say. Kelly was overreacting, but Austin wasn't saying anything that wasn't true. Max pressured her, and she would have broken up with him for it even if she hadn't realized that she was in love with Sasha. In that moment, what she wanted more than anything was to escape, so she said, "Can I just leave? I'm not really in the mood to hang out right now, so can one of you give Kelly a ride home later?"

She didn't know where she was going when she left, but she wasn't surprised when she found herself outside of Sasha's apartment. For some reason, when he opened the door he didn't seem surprised to see her there, either.

"What are you doing here?" he asked.

At some point during the drive she calmed down, so her voice was even when she said, "I'm not really sure. I just didn't want to be anywhere else."

He held open the door for her, and there was the slightest amount of tension when she stepped inside. She wasn't sure how it would work, being here and knowing how she felt about him, but Kelly was right. It didn't change a thing.

She sat down on the couch and decided that she should at least tell him part of what happened at Austin's, so she said, "I don't think Max is coming back to the Rock. I could be wrong about that, but we broke up and Austin's throwing him out of the house, so I think he's probably going to leave." She saw him about to ask a question so she added, "I don't want to talk about it."

He didn't let her completely off the hook. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah, sort of," she answered. She wasn't really upset about breaking up with Max except to be pissed that her first real boyfriend turned out to be an asshole. She wasn't really upset about being in love with Sasha. She was drained, though. Too much happened in too short of a time. "I'm tired. That's about it right now."

"Then go to sleep. I'm going to call your mum and let her know you're here." He stopped to kiss her on the head as he passed. It was one of the things that she loved most about him, that he took everything in stride. She was such a fool not to have realized her feelings.

She heard bits of his conversation with Kim carry across the room as Sasha paced the kitchen.

"…didn't say much. I know she broke…"

"…kicking him out of the house, so it must…"

"…she doesn't seem upset. I don't know if…"

"…asleep on the couch right now. She…"

He hung up and came back in the living room. She was still awake, sitting on his couch like she was when he left. "I thought I told you to go to sleep."

She smiled up at him. "I was waiting for you." She didn't know what made her say it. She didn't know what made her come here in the first place, but it didn't seem weird. So far, everything was the same between them as it had always been. If anything she felt _more_ comfortable with him because she wasn't fighting the truth anymore.

He sat down next to her and she curled into him. They didn't sit like that often, but it seemed very natural when they did. He wrapped both his arms around her and said, "I know this sounds crazy, but right before you knocked on the door I was thinking how much I wished you were here."

"Doesn't sound crazy to me."

They were quiet for a long time before Payson said, "Hey Sasha? Whatever was bothering you before, is it still there?" Something seemed different, like he was more at ease, and she thought that was it. He moved past his problem.

"That depends on what you mean. It's still there, but I'm not really bothered by it anymore."

"I get that." It was what somehow happened to her between Austin's house and Sasha's apartment. She was so freaked out sitting in Austin's backyard with her feelings for Sasha crashing over her, but when she calmed down she realized it wasn't the disaster she thought it was. Kelly was right. The feelings had always been there. This was nothing new.

They didn't talk much. They sat together on the couch, dozing on and off, and at some point that Payson didn't remember they laid down together and slept. It was so different than it had been with Max. Payson pushed Max's hand away when he moved it down her hip, but being with Sasha felt so right that neither of them noticed that his hand was resting on her hip while his thumb stroked back and forth just under the hem of her shirt.

Payson chuckled, and a very sleepy Sasha asked, "What?"

"I was just thinking, if the picture of me kissing you caused such a scandal, what would happen if anyone got a picture of us spooning on your couch?"

He laughed and Payson could feel his chest rumbling against her back. It made her whole body tingle.

"It's a good thing nobody's here with a camera, then, isn't it?"

She fell back asleep and the next time she opened her eyes, Sasha was already awake. He was propped up on one arm behind her, watching her sleep.

She looked at him over her shoulder and asked, "What time is it?"

"It's morning. Much later than you normally get up on Sundays."

"I slept here all night?" Her brain was a little fuzzy, and it was taking her longer than normal to process. She couldn't remember if her mom knew where she was.

"Yes. Your mum said to let you sleep as long as you needed," he said, and then she remembered hearing him talk on the phone to Kim the night before. "Apparently you needed twelve hours."

"I slept for twelve hours? Ugh, no wonder I feel like I'm hung over."

She sorted through her memories. She remembered everything before she came to Sasha's, but she only had vague memories of what happened there. A few snippets of half-sleeping conversations, a few times waking up in his arms, and a few things that made her turn scarlet. Payson didn't know if Sasha loved her or not, but Kelly was right about one thing. He was definitely attracted to her.

He must have thought that she was blushing because of where his hand was, because he pulled it off her waist. She hadn't noticed it was there, but now that it was gone, she wanted it back. She turned around on the couch, put her arms around him, and buried her head in the crook of his neck. "I'm not ready to wake up. Let's go back to sleep."

She smiled against his skin when he put his arm back around her, the exact reaction she was trying for. She snuggled closer to him and got the _other_ reaction she was trying for. She could have an immense amount of fun with this information.

Payson could practically hear Sasha's thoughts. He was in a very awkward situation, but pushing her away had the potential to make it even more awkward. He had no good option. Payson pushed herself even closer to him.

She could tell the exact moment that he realized she was doing it on purpose. "You are evil, Payson. I cannot believe you're doing this."

She laughed and moved a few inches away from him. "Consider that payback for all the times you've given us extra conditioning. If you torture me, I'm going to torture you."

"When the hell did we get to the point that you would do this to me on purpose?" he asked.

"When the hell did we get to the point that we would sleep together all night?" she retorted.

When she sat up and faced him, he laughed and reached up to smooth her hair, which was probably a mess after so long sleeping on the couch. Then, for the first time since she got to his apartment, Payson talked about why she came there in the first place. "I broke up with Max because he was pushing me to go farther than I wanted to, but, Sasha, you've had your hands all over me and I've never had problem with it. You were touching me in the exact same ways last night that made me push Max away. So how come I can do _this_ with you, but it bothered me with Max?"

"I don't know," he said. He sat up with her and pushed her hair out of her face, leaving his palm resting against her cheek when he was done. "Maybe because it isn't sexual for us?"

She laughed. "Really, you think what I was just doing wasn't sexual? But that's exactly my point. I could never have played games like that with Max. I couldn't play games like that with anyone. I was embarrassed for like ten seconds when I remember it happening last night, but with anyone else I would have been humiliated. Why?"

"Maybe it's trust. You know that no matter how I touch you or how you tease me, I'm never going to expect something more." He paused to consider his words and then confessed, "I've worried about this before. I don't stop to think about the way I touch you, and I've worried that you were uncomfortable with it."

"I never have been. There are a few times that I was embarrassed, but it never lasted. I know you're not doing it on purpose." She leaned into him again and for a long time they sat holding each other. Finally she said, "I'm really glad I came here last night, Sasha."

He smiled, one of his real smiles that very few people got to see, and said, "I'm really glad you came here, too."

* * *

><p>AN: Well, that went places I wasn't expecting. I enjoyed writing Payson like this. I've written her so many times as very sexually aware, but it was fun to write her a little more naïve. She's in a much more teenage mindset where realizing that the man she loves is attracted to her means that she has something to tease him about, not that she wants to sleep with him. Having sex isn't really a consideration for her yet. Sasha was exactly right. She can be comfortable with the aspects of sex with him because she knows that he's not actually going to try anything.

p.s. I just went back and fixed a lot of the inevitable typos that make it through in previous chapters. I think I caught them all, but then again I proof read a million times and they still slipped through, so who knows? Let me know if you see anything in this, previous, or future chapters.


	15. Chapter 15

Valeri was reassured and suspicious in turns. He was certain that he would be able to figure out Payson and Sasha's relationship if only he could see them together, but it turned out far more complicated than he expected.

He kept a close eye on them all through dinner the previous night, through practice in the morning, and into the competition. They were certainly very close. The problem was that the whole group from the Rock seemed very close. They all joked together and told stories at each other's expense, and while all of the gymnasts appeared to have great respect for Sasha and revered him as a coach, they were also comfortable with him. When Sasha told an embarrassing story about Kelly, she had no qualms about kicking him under the table, and Lauren didn't hesitate to give a very accurate imitation of him bossing them around during practice.

But every time Valeri convinced himself that there was no special relationship between Payson and Sasha, they did something that made him suspicious again. After dinner the Rock team and several of their friends from WOGA sat talking in one of the hotel's lounge areas, and Payson sat next to Sasha. They sat a reasonable distance apart, and there was nothing unusual about the way that Sasha's arm was draped across the back of the couch, but anyone looking closely enough could see that Sasha's fingertips were touching Payson's shoulder, and neither of them appeared to notice. It was as if the touch was so normal to them that it was beneath their attention.

Then, once Valeri convinced himself that he was overreacting to their touch the night before, the smile happened. The WOGA coaches were standing with Sasha and the Rock's chaperone, a young woman making obvious attempts to gain Sasha's attention, and watching the gymnasts prepare for the competition, when Payson happened to look round, found Sasha's eyes within seconds, and smiled. That in and of itself was not suspicious, because Payson smiled lot, but the unusual part was that Sasha smiled back. For most of the time that Valeri had known Sasha, the younger man never smiled. That changed when he started coaching at the Rock, but this smile was somehow different. That one smile showed more pure happiness than Valeri had ever seen in Sasha, even when he was laughing with his team the previous night. He didn't smile that way with his other gymnasts.

They were through the first round of competition now, and Valeri was once again sure that he was imagining things. Sasha felt nothing more for Payson than normal affection for his star gymnast. He wasn't treating her any differently than he treated the other girls. Surely if he was in a relationship with her, he would look at her more often. If anything he was looking at Payson's sister the most often.

The whole team was paying Becca Keeler the most attention, in fact. They were cheering for her louder than for anyone else, and they all gave her very enthusiastic hugs when she came off vault. She scored low in comparison to the other girls, but everyone she was competing against had been elite for at least a year and she was only a few months in. For instance, Becca's vault was out of a 5.0, whereas her sister's was out of a 6.5, but she was still performing much better than Valeri expected from a girl so novice. He credited that partly to Becca sharing a small amount of her sister's talent, and mostly to Sasha's coaching. He formed routines best suited to the gymnasts rather than what was expected. Most new elites started vault with a Yurchenko half and worked their way up, but Becca's stretched forward handspring fit her much better and could be advanced all the way to a 6.3 over time. Her other routines suited her just as well, and they were easier for her because of it.

It was difficult keeping an eye on the Rock's team while also coaching his own. He threw his eyes back and forth between the two teams and had the convenient excuse of analyzing the Rock girls as competition for his nationally ranked girls. He noticed that Payson didn't do any of her upgrades on bars, nor did Kelly. He wasn't sure if they were playing it close to the vest or if Sasha just didn't want them to upstage the other gymnasts—any more than they did with their normal routines, that is. Some things couldn't be helped.

Becca was up, and the other team members were making a racket. They were putting Valeri's girls on edge, because it was very unusual for a team to act so casual during a competition. It came off as supreme confidence, and maybe it was. Becca looked much more confident stepping up to the bars than most first time competitors did, and it had everything to do with the support that her team was giving her.

Her set was spectacular. She was a bars specialist, that much was clear from watching her in practice, but this was the best she'd performed it so far. It was national level. When she landed her dismount, Payson and Kelly practically tackled her with a group hug. Valeri couldn't help looking to the scoreboard to see what the judges gave her.

13.50. Definitely national level. A score like that would likely put her top ten at Junior Nationals. There was a few seconds of dead silence, and then Payson screamed. Then Kelly. Then Kaylie and Lauren. On the floor, Valeri's gymnast nearly fell out of the air in reaction to the unexpected loud noise.

Sasha picked Becca up in a hug that held her more than a foot above the floor and put Valeri at ease. He treated Becca and all of the girls exactly the same as he did Payson.

Then, for a brief second during the chaos of hugs and congratulations, Sasha's hand found Payson's and they twined their fingers together.

o-O-o

It had been a wonderful day. Payson took first place in everything except beam, as expected; Lauren took first place on beam and third on vault, barely losing out to Kaylie by a tenth of a point; Kelly took second place on bars and floor, with a fourth place finish on vault; and Kaylie finished second place on vault, third on floor and beam, and fourth on bars. The WOGA girl who won bronze on bars was the temporary gym hero, because she was the only one who medaled. WOGA knew they weren't likely to win medals competing against the four best gymnasts in the country, but they did win some serious bragging points for having the balls to go up against the Rock.

The best part of the competition had been Becca. Becca and Alicia were the only juniors competing, and Alicia had more than a year's experience on Becca, but Becs held her own. Twelfth on floor, eleventh on vault, a surprise tenth on beam, beating out one of the WOGA seniors who had a few bobbles, and an _amazing_ eighth on bars. Payson couldn't be prouder, and neither could Becca. It was one hell of a first competition.

They were going out to dinner to celebrate, so Payson was searching for Kaylie. She was the only one not accounted for and they couldn't leave without her. She wasn't anywhere inside, so Payson headed out to search the terraces and, on a whim, followed the path down to the pool. Kaylie was there, sitting with her pant legs rolled up and her feet dangling in the water.

"Aren't you cold?" Payson asked. Kaylie did seem surprised to hear her.

"Not really. The water is warm."

Payson didn't care if the pool was heated; sitting with her feet in water in the middle of December still sounded cold. She rolled up her own pants and joined Kaylie anyway.

"So what's going on?" she asked. Now that they were sitting together, Payson could see that Kaylie was crying.

Kaylie wiped her face. "Nothing. I'm just being stupid."

"The competition?" It was inevitable that Kaylie would have to face the truth about Kelly and Payson. Seeing it happen in the gym was one thing. Seeing it on a scoreboard was another thing altogether.

"I told you I was being stupid," she said with sad little laugh. "I always knew that you were better than me, really. I tried to tell myself that I would have won anyway, but I knew it wasn't true. But I _really_ thought I was better than Kelly."

"You can't look at it like that, Kay. We all have our specialties. Kelly is better than you in some places and you're better than her in some places. You can't base everything on the All Around." Payson didn't try to pretend that Kelly wasn't the better All Arounder. It would only be an insult to Kaylie to lie to her.

Kaylie had been looking straight ahead, but she finally turned to look at Payson. "What's left for me, Pay? I barely beat Lauren on vault and she's getting better every day. I've never had a shot against Lauren on beam or Kelly on bars, and Kelly is better on floor. There's no room for me to get an individual medal."

"Floor is yours. You have to trust Sasha, Kaylie. He thinks that you can medal on floor, you just have to trust him to get you there. You've got a year and a half to work with him. By the time the Olympics roll around you're going to blow Kelly out of the water."

"She's your best friend," Kaylie said. "Why do you want me to beat her?"

"Because you deserve to." It was as simple as that. Lauren deserved beam and vault, Kelly deserved bars and All Around, and Kaylie deserved floor. And Payson… as much as she hated to say it, because it sounded egotistical, she deserved them all. She was the best, and it was stupid to pretend like she wasn't.

Kaylie must have been on the same wavelength. "So if Sasha's plans work out, you get five individual medals and I get one. I think I should hate you for that."

"Do you?"

"No." Payson felt a wave of relief wash over her. "That's the weird part. I think it's like you said about deserving it. You're better than the rest of us. I heard Sasha say once that you were a prodigy."

"Sasha's full of it," Payson said. In her heart, though, she was really flattered. She pulled her feet out of the water and stood up. "Come on, let's go to dinner. The others are waiting for us."

o-O-o

Kelly was giving makeovers to Becca and Alicia. Payson stayed for a little while, but makeovers weren't her thing, so she came back to her own room and left Kelly to play beauty shop with the younger girls.

She had a lot to think about. The last two weeks had be some of the happiest of her life. Somehow knowing how she felt about Sasha had made things between them even better. She fought so hard to convince herself that she _wasn't_ in love with him that finally admitting it was a relief. There was also the absence of the guilt she felt when she was Max. She was such an idiot not to realize that the guilt wasn't because she was breaking the rules, but because she felt like she was betraying Sasha.

She had all this figured out by now. What she still needed to think about was Sasha's feelings for her. Kelly said that he was in love with her, and for two weeks Payson had been trying to figure out if he was. Sometimes she thought she was only a friend to him, albeit his closest friend, but every once in a while…

It was the way he looked at her that made her think that maybe, just maybe, he might love her too. It was different than the way he looked at other people, but she couldn't manage to explain how. Something about his eyes, perhaps, or the way he smiled. He had a special smile for Payson. Never once had she seen him smile that way for anyone else.

Something happened during the competition that made her more sure that he loved her than she had ever been before. After Becca's bars set, when they were all celebrating, she reached her hand out to him. Even now she had no idea why she did it, but for whatever reason, he reached out to her as well. Their hands brushed together and for a brief moment they linked. They weren't holding hands, per say, but her fingers ghosted between his and then trailed away again. The touch was intimate, even more so than the night they slept together. She could still feel his thumb sweeping against the back of her hand.

She put on a sweatshirt and went out to the balcony, hoping that the cool air and open space would help her think, but she didn't find the solitude that she was looking for. Sasha was standing on his own balcony, directly next to hers, looking at the stars. He looked her way when he heard the door open and smiled. It was the smile that was only for her.

"What are you doing out here?" he asked. "I thought you were in Becca's room."

"Kelly is playing with their hair. I thought I should escape before she decided to work on mine."

He laughed, reached across the foot of space between their balconies, and twirled a strand of her hair around his finger. "Well, I'm glad you escaped, then. I love your hair. I wouldn't want Kelly to do anything to destroy it."

They stood chatting for a while, each leaning against the railings of their balconies, until the wind picked up and blew Payson's hair around her face. Sasha tucked it back behind her ears and stroked his fingertips down her cheek. It reminded Payson so much of his fingers brushing against hers that afternoon that suddenly she had to know.

She couldn't look at him while she said it, just in case she was wrong, so she stared at the bricks of the building. She whispered, "It's not just me, is it? Sasha, tell me it's not just me."

His answer was just as quiet as her question. "No. It's not just you."

She risked a glance at him and he was staring across the city. She felt better that she wasn't the only one scared of this. It was such a huge step, admitting it to each other. "How long?" she asked.

"I don't know. I've been trying to figure that out and I… I don't know. I don't know when things changed or even if it's always been this way and I just didn't realize it."

"Sasha, look at me," she pleaded. She could see his worry and confusion so she said, "I don't expect anything. I know that nothing can change, but it doesn't have to. I've been so happy these past couple of weeks and we haven't done anything different. Just knowing that it's there makes me happy, and knowing that you feel the same way. I don't need anything more right now."

"Right now?" he asked.

She spent a lot of time recently thinking about what would happen if Sasha was in love with her, and there was only one real option. "You won't be my coach forever. A year and a half isn't that long. I don't mind waiting. Do you?"

"For you, Payson? I'd wait forever." She was so relieved. It would be easy for her to wait; she wasn't supposed to date anyway. Sasha was making a bigger sacrifice staying single for so long because it was a change in the way he lived. She loved that he would make that sacrifice for her.

"We should go inside," he suggested, breaking her reverie. "I'm having a very hard time not kissing you right now, and the longer we stay here the more likely I am to do something stupid."

They stepped away from each other, but before Payson went back into her room she said, "Sasha? I know I we're supposed to avoid this right now, but just so you know… I wouldn't have minded if you did something stupid."

She went inside, went to bed, and wasn't the least bit surprised when her phone buzzed on the nightstand. When Kelly got back to their room an hour later, Payson and Sasha were still on the phone together, and Kelly fell asleep to the sound of Payson's hushed voice just like she did every night.

o-O-o

There was a party going on in one of the hotel's conference rooms, sort of a goodwill luncheon between WOGA and the Rock before the Rock team went back to Colorado. Kelly and Nicky were having a party of their own.

They were sitting at the empty bar eating sneaked-in frozen yogurt while Kelly swung her legs under her high barstool like a little kid. She was telling stories about the things that she did with Payson, Lauren, and Kaylie, and talking about life with the Keelers. Nicky had never seen her so happy.

"You really like living with Payson's family, don't you?" he said.

She was animated with her answer. "Oh my God, Nicky, you have no idea. I didn't know that there were people who lived like this. Mark and Kim are _happy_ together. It's the coolest thing. They goof off together, and kiss, and actually _want_ to spend time with each other. They've been married for seventeen years and they're still totally in love. Did you even know that was possible? And they hug us every night before we go to bed, and they always say 'I love you' to each one of us. _Every night_, and then sometimes Kim will say it randomly during the day, like when we're about to leave or something. I don't remember anyone saying 'I love you' to me in like ten years, and I've probably heard it like a hundred times in the last two months. And it's not like they just say it and don't mean it; we _actually_ spend time together. We sit around and watch movies together or cook dinner together—_and oh my God, Nicky, the food_. They eat _real_ food. It tastes good and everything, but I haven't gained a single pound."

All of this was said in about thirty seconds, and she would likely have said more if she hadn't run out of breath. Nicky couldn't help but smile; her happiness was contagious. He kept asking questions just to hear her talk like this.

"What about the Rock? How do you like training there?"

Again she answered with rapid-fire, breathless enthusiasm. "It's so great. It's not like at DE where everybody just fell all over me but nobody actually bothered to get to know me. For one thing, everybody falls all over Payson instead of me, which I didn't think I would be okay with but I actually am, because watching her put up with it reminds me of what a pain in the ass it actually is and I'm glad I don't have to deal with it anymore. And then I actually have friends to work out with, and we _help_ each other. I've gotten so much better on beam just because Lauren has been helping me with it, and she's _really_ good. I mean, I knew she was a great when she competed on beam, but I had no idea that it was like that all the time. She can learn a new move on beam in like half a day."

Nicky was awed to see a Kelly Parker who was excited about how good someone else was. The team competition was only a small part of the sport and ultimately all of the girls were in competition against each other, but Kelly sounded so proud and impressed of her friend.

She was still talking—"And Sasha is such a great coach. I'm not saying that he's better than Marty, because you know Marty was the best coach I've ever had, but it's different with Sasha because he's so much younger. Marty was kind of like a dad, and Sasha's more like a really bossy older brother. He really knows what he's doing, too. He's helping me with my ankle and it's already so much better than it was. And who would have believed it, but Sasha is _funny_."—She was right, Nicky didn't believe it.—"He makes 80s pop culture references and has Guitar Hero set up in his office, and he and Marty got Austin _drunk_. And most of the 'Scary Sasha' stuff is just for show. He pretty much doesn't care as long as you're working hard, so we've figured out that if we're going to misbehave we just have to do it where the other gymnasts can't see us, because he has to punish us if other people around, but if it's just any of us or Austin then he laughs about it."

This didn't sound at all like the Rock that Nicky remembered. He wondered if Sasha had changed since then or if Nicky was just on the outside looking in like all of the gymnasts who fell for the 'Scary Sasha' act, as Kelly called it. The Sasha Belov that Nicky knew was surly and cheerless. He did make a Farris Bueller joke once, though. There had to be something that Nicky missed if Kelly was this crazy about Sasha and Payson somehow ended up wanting to kiss him.

Nicky and Kelly talked for more than an hour, and Nicky said almost nothing in that time. He listened to Kelly describe every detail of her life, and whenever she stopped, he asked a new question to get her talking again. Nicky sat and basked in her happiness, content that she was finally getting the life that she deserved. He battled with himself whether or not to burst her bubble by asking the hard question, but he needed to know.

"Kelly," he said, his voice almost a whisper compared to the boisterous conversation they had been having, "what did Sheila do?"

A shadow fell over Kelly's face and she broke eye contact. "What didn't she do, Nicky? There were a million times that I should have left, but I didn't know I could. I don't know what I would do without the Keelers and Mr. Tanner. I owe them my life."

"Mr. Tanner? What did he do?" As far as Nicky knew, Steve Tanner was a slimeball.

"I never told you that?" she asked. She looked back at him and a little bit of her smile was back. "He got me out. You know what my mom's like, how many connections she has. Anything I said she could have got around, but Mr. Tanner worked non-stop for days to get me away from her. He was brilliant. She can't touch me now, and it's all because of him."

"You kind of love him, huh?" Nicky said. He had never seen the Steve Tanner that Kelly was describing, but he could hear the same affection in her voice that she used when she talked about Mark Keeler. She hadn't had a father for ten years, but it sounded like now she had several.

"I do. I kind of love Lauren, too. It's hard not to love the Keelers, but the Tanners surprised me."

Nicky wanted to hear her happy again, so he said, "Then tell me about them. I haven't heard any stories about them yet."

Her smile widened and she started, "Okay, did you know that Lauren's afraid of the dark? So this one night we were all sleeping at her house and…"

Kelly launched into a description of the prank they played on Lauren and continued talking, almost nonstop, for another half hour. When she was too hoarse to continue, they walked back to the real party, but before they walked through the doors, Nicky stopped her and said, "I'm really glad that you're so happy, Kel."

He brushed his lips against hers, took a deep breath, and then they stepped back into the real world together.

o-O-o

Nastia forgot her purse.

She was on her way out the door when she realized that she didn't have her purse with her, so she turned around and headed back to the room where they just finished the reception. She didn't expect to hear voices when she got there.

It was Payson and Sasha, and the shuffling of chairs said that they were cleaning up a little after the party. That was good, actually, because she would get a chance to really say goodbye to Payson before the girls flew back to Colorado. She put her hand on the door to push it open, but it only moved a couple of inches before Payson said something that made Nastia stop dead in her tracks.

"I kind of want to kiss you right now."

Nastia peeked through the crack to see Payson perched on top of one of the tables while Sasha stacked chairs against the wall. He chuckled and said, "But you won't."

The response confused Nastia. Her first horrified thought upon hearing Payson's statement was that the rumors were true about Payson and Sasha, but in that case, Sasha's answer made no sense. In any other case, Payson's words made no sense.

Inside, Sasha moved to stand in front of Payson and rested his hands on either side of her. Payson said, "You kind of want to kiss me right now, too."

"But I won't," he said. "Why the sudden desire to kiss?"

Payson played with his collar. "I always have liked you in a suit."

He laughed again. "So I should avoid wearing one until after the Olympics, then?"

A thought was forming in Nastia's head… After the Olympics? Was he saying that they were going to be together after the Olympics?

"I don't think you could get away with that. Besides, I'm pretty sure that's not the only thing that's going to make me want to kiss you in the next eighteen months."

"Unfortunately it's nineteen months," Sasha said. "I counted."

Nastia didn't know how to feel about this. A part of her was horrified, but a part of her wondered how much they cared about each other to wait for nineteen months to be together. When had this happened? _How_ had this happened?

Payson frowned. "Do you think it will be harder now that we know it's mutual? Will it be harder to keep things platonic?"

"I thought you said it made you happy to know that I felt the same way?"

"I does. It makes me so happy, Sasha, but I'm just worried that things will be more… tempting, maybe?"

Nastia shuddered when she thought about what they might be tempted to do, but then for half a second she saw them in a different light. For that tiny fraction of time, she forgot about who they were and realized what a romantic picture they made—Payson sitting on the table in her lace dress with her stiletto heels dropped on the floor in front of her, Sasha leaning toward her with his tie loosened and top button undone. They could have been a Jack Vettriano painting.

There was a hefty age difference between them, even though Nastia didn't know the exact number, but dressed like that, Payson gained a few years and Sasha lost a few. They looked almost the same age. Payson definitely acted older than she was sometimes, so it wasn't a huge leap to imagine them working together. Payson was seventeen, though, and Sasha was her coach.

Sasha stroked his fingers against Payson's cheek, and there was so much devotion on both of their faces that Nastia's knees went weak. Sasha said, "Give it time, Payson. It will be hard for a little while and then everything will go back to normal. I'll have a much harder time, I'm sure, since you love teasing me so much."

Payson's smile was a baffling mix of childlike and coquettish. "I do really enjoy doing that. You're such an easy target."

"And you, drăcușor, are wicked and cruel. But I wouldn't change a single thing about you."

"Of course you wouldn't, because I'm wonderful." Nastia almost blew her cover by snorting. She wasn't one hundred percent sure that Payson was joking, either, because the girl always did have ridiculous amounts of confidence.

Sasha grabbed Payson's legs and pulled her to the edge of the table so that she was forced to either stand or fall. "Come on," he said, "you're supposed to be helping me clean up. Stop being lazy and start clearing off trash."

Sasha turned away but Payson grabbed his hand to stop him. When he looked at her she said, "I am happy, Sasha. I'm really, really happy."

Nastia cared about Payson. She was a good friend and someone that Nastia felt very protective of, so she didn't know how to feel about this. One the one hand, Sasha was her coach and a lot older than her, so he could be taking advantage. On the other hand, if he was willing to wait a year and a half for her, it didn't sound like he was taking advantage at all. They did seem to really care for each other, and Nastia had never heard Payson sound so happy. It would have to be a secret, though. A single whisper of this to the wrong person could ruin lives, and there was no way that Nastia was going to let that happen. There was only one thing to do: keep the secret and hope that everything turned out well in the end.

The question was, now that Nastia had to pretend like she didn't overhear anything, how was she going to get her purse…

A/N: Some pics on pinterest of the girls' dresses. Lauren and Kelly were particularly hard to dress because they have such drastic style changes based on what has happened in this story. Lauren needed to be girly and pretty, and not at all sexual, and Kelly needed to be super conservative but still high fashion. It might take me a little while to get the hang of them. Also, there is a video on pinterest explaining the lobster quote from last chapter.


	16. Chapter 16

A/N: Geesh, this chapter took me forever to write.

* * *

><p>"We should watch it now," Kelly whined.<p>

Payson held up her hands like she was defending herself against Kelly's words. "Don't ask me, ask Sasha. He's the coach."

"And the coach says no," Sasha added.

They finished the second-to-last episode of the first season of _Friends_, and Kelly wanted to watch the last one straightaway. For weeks they had watched a single episode in Sasha's office every day during lunch, but watching a second one would likely make them late getting back to practice. Payson was happy to let Sasha make the decision, because she was torn. She really wanted to see the season finale, but she also didn't want to be late.

Since Sasha shot Kelly down, she bugged him instead. She tried to peer at his paperwork, but since she didn't bother to get off the couch, she wasn't successful. "What are you working on, anyway?" she asked.

"Boring stuff that I'd rather not do," he said. He didn't stop doing it. "It's finances on my property in England."

"Oh, you're going to love this," Payson said, excited to have this information to share with her fellow _Pride and Prejudice_ lover. "He lives in _Derbyshire_."

"Shut the front door!" Kelly yelled. Payson snickered at her choice of invective. "How did I not know this? I thought I knew everything about you."

"I didn't know you had a house in England, Sasha," said Summer. The attempted conversation starter went right over Sasha's head. All of his attention was on the couch behind Summer, where Payson and Kelly were.

He was wearing a wicked smile. "You know everything about me, do you? Please, Kelly, enlighten me."

Kelly sat up on her knees. She looked just as wicked as he did. "Okay, you were born in Romania. You moved to London when you were three so that your mom could go back to the Royal Ballet, and you basically lived backstage of the Royal Opera House for the next seven years until you started really concentrating on gymnastics. When you were thirteen you moved back to Romania to train in their national program and made a splash winning nearly every junior competition in Europe."

Anyone who read his book would know that information, but Kelly kept going. "Then when you were seventeen you had a _torrid_ love affair with MJ Martin until she dumped you for Marty. You had a huge fight with your dad about it, moved back to England, and then spent the next year drinking like a fish and screwing every girl in a leotard—"

"Okay, that's enough information about me," Sasha said, drowning out Kelly's continued biography.

Summer was horrified. "Surely you're not saying that stuff is _true_, Sasha?"

"I'm not saying anything, because you"—he pointed at Kelly—"should not know that, and you're going to forget that you ever heard it."

Kelly was about to get herself in trouble, Payson could tell. "So I guess I should also forget that you hooked up with the coach from Phoenix Gymnastics Club at Nationals?"

Summer made a sound that might indicate she was dying. Sasha said, "That is enough, Kelly Jane Parker. If you say another word then you're conditioning from now until sunset."

Payson tried not to laugh. If Sasha was breaking out the middle names, he was desperate to end the conversation. He was trying to act stern rather than show embarrassment.

"How do you know this stuff?" Payson asked. She knew it all, of course, but only because Sasha told her everything, but not even the fansites knew about MJ or his dad, and certainly not about Jennifer from Phoenix. There was no logical way for Kelly to know that.

Kelly rolled her eyes. "Please, I know everything about every Olympic gold medalist since I was born."

"Including who they sleep with?" Payson asked, now in pain from keeping her laugher in check. "You are such a freak, Kelly!"

"Well it's not like Sasha's exactly discreet about it. That chick from Phoenix just walked out of his room the next morning like it was no big deal. I mean, geez, Sasha, didn't you realize you were in a hotel full of impressionable young girls? The least you could have done was sneak around a little bit."

"What, were you spying on me?" Sasha asked, completely indignant.

"Well duh," Kelly said. "How else did you think I knew all that stuff about the Rock back then? You may not know how to be sneaky, but I do."

Sasha pointed at the door. "Go. Conditioning. Now."

Kelly flounced out the door, still in high spirits despite her punishment, and Payson leaned her head against the arm of the couch while she shook with silent laughter. Sasha threw a pencil at her.

"Ow!" she said. She threw the pencil back at him, but he dodged it. "Don't blame me because you're such a man whore."

"Pay—"

She burst out laughing again before he could even yell her name. This is why she loved Kelly so much.

Payson was less than comfortable with Sasha's history with women. Some of it she knew, like most gym-nuts, from fansites and forums. There were countless bits of gymnastics gossip floating around out there, and since Sasha was one of the most well known, popular male gymnasts, a lot of it was about him. A lot of it was about Austin, too, and some of it was about Payson and Sasha together. The kiss video was never made public, but all it took was a rumor to make it on the fansites, so online, Payson got added to the long list of women that Sasha Belov slept with. It didn't matter that it wasn't true.

She made Sasha tell her everything a long time ago. She wanted to know what was true and what was made up, so she asked him questions until she knew it all. No, he did not sleep with Shannon Miller. Yes, he did sleep with a Spice Girl. No, he did not have an affair with the wife of the UK National Team Coach. She was glad to learn that a lot of the rumors were false, but she knew his number and it was big. She would never admit that this bothered her before, but now that they had more or less made their promises, she was free to be bothered. She really was going to join that list of women at some point, and she wished the list wasn't quite so long.

Kelly did this on purpose. She could have chosen not to mention it at all, but instead she made it into a joke. It helped to be able to laugh about it rather than worry about it. This was something that Kelly learned the hard way, that sometimes the best way to move past something was to make a joke out of it. There were other times that there was simply no joke to be made about the situation, but Payson thankfully hadn't had any of those experiences. Kelly had several. Payson suspected that Kelly was on a mission to make others laugh about their problems because so often she couldn't laugh at her own.

When she managed to rein in her laughter, Payson hauled herself off the couch and went downstairs to join Kelly in the conditioning circuit. Sasha didn't even have to tell her she was being punished, too; it was a given.

Kelly was near the edge of the gym doing suicides in a taped off corridor designed specifically for that particular form of torture. She stopped when Payson made her way over and just started laughing. That, of course, started Payson laughing again, and neither could stop. Kelly gasped out, "Did you see Summer's face!?"

"Did you see _Sasha's_ face?" Payson said. "He was so embarrassed. He probably won't be able to look you in the eye for a week!"

Kelly had to lean on Payson for support so she didn't fall down laughing. "The best part is, I was just guessing about MJ! I didn't even know if it was true, but I guess it is!"

Payson was holding onto Kelly, too, trying to keep them both standing up, but when Sasha came out and yelled their names they laughed so hard that they lost their balance and toppled to the floor. After they finally calmed down and started doing their suicides, they had to start over twice because one of them cracked up in the middle of a run. Sasha wasn't happy, but Payson couldn't remember the last time she had so much fun being punished.

o-O-o

Payson and Kelly were at the Rock being disciplined for something, Mark was in a meeting with Steve Tanner about KPE, and Becca was practicing late at the gym. Kim suspected that Becca wanted to watch her sisters get punished more than she wanted to work, but the result was the same: Kim was home alone, cooking dinner by herself.

When she came inside, she sat her purse down on the counter and flipped through the mail, both daily actions of habit rather than intent. There were a few pieces of junk mail (she tossed those in the trash without looking inside of them), a letter marked "Confidential" and addressed to Mark (more KPE paperwork), and two bills. She glanced at the first and put it aside to pay later, and then opened the cell phone bill. She hated opening that bill. It was always higher than she wanted it to be.

She cringed at the amount and shuffled through the usage records to make sure there was nothing obviously out of place, like the time Becca called in votes to a reality show without realizing that each call cost ninety nine cents. Kim didn't see anything like that, but something seemed off about what she was looking at, so she went through the pages again, more slowly this time. There was too much of the same number, over and over again, and it seemed familiar to her…

She pulled out her own phone and scrolled through her contacts until she found the person she was looking for: Sasha Belov. She compared the number on her phone to the number on the bill, and then checked it again three or four times. There it was, Sasha's number, listed dozens of times on her cell phone bill. Kim flipped back a few pages to see whose usage she was looking at, but she was just verifying what she already knew. This was Payson's phone.

She tossed out the information for hers, Mark's, Becca's, and Kelly's phones and only looked at Payson's. The numbers didn't change like she futilely wished they would, so Kim was forced to continue. She looked at times—all hours of the day, every day. Some of them were at two or three in the morning. Call duration—half of them were several hours long. There was hardly a single date on the bill that didn't show a long phone conversation between Sasha and Payson late in the evening. Text messages—there were hundreds of them, both incoming and outgoing.

Had she really been so blind? She knew that Payson and Sasha were close, and anyone could see Sasha's affection for Payson, but Kim never thought that it strayed outside of a coaching relationship. But this—she didn't want to think it, but this had to be an affair. Everything she knew, or thought she knew, about Sasha was defied by these papers. She fought so hard for Sasha when everybody was saying he was a bad influence, and all this time…

How long had it been? Not before he left for Romania, because they were both far too embarrassed about that kiss for anything to have been going on then. Kim ran to Mark's office and dug the old bills out of the filing cabinet. Now that she knew what to look for, she couldn't believe she never caught it before. This had been happening since September, ever since Sasha came back to the Rock. What changed in Romania that would make Sasha do _this_?

She took the old bills back to the kitchen with her and sat in a daze, trying to assign any kind of reason to what she saw on the paper. Again and again she tried to justify the calls, but nothing made sense. This screamed of an illicit relationship. Why else would they talk in the middle of the night? Did Kelly know? She shared a room with Payson, so she must. Payson would be having these conversations in front of her. Did that mean that Kelly was covering for them, pretending to be with Payson so that Payson and Sasha could sneak off together? Sneak off together to do _what_? How far had this gone?

She was still sitting at the counter when the girls came home from the gym. They started to come in the kitchen with her, but she stopped them with a few quiet words. "Kelly, take Becca out to dinner. Call Mark and tell him to meet you there. I need to talk to Payson alone."

All three girls looked confused and worried, but Kelly quietly guided Becca back out of the house. Payson came forward and said, "What's going on?"

Kim handed her the cell phone bill and watched Payson's carefully controlled reaction as she scanned down the pages. She could keep the emotion off her face, but she couldn't conceal her guilt when she said, "Mom, this isn't what you think."

"What do I think, Payson?" Kim asked.

"I… I don't actually know," Payson said. "What _do_ you think is going on?"

Kim was hoping that Payson might have a better answer, one that would enlighten Kim to her own feelings, because she wasn't sure herself what she thought was happening. "I think that you and Sasha are trustworthy people who would never go behind our backs, but then I look at _this_"—she pointed to the papers in Payson's hand—"and everything about it says that I'm wrong. I have wracked my brains trying to find an explanation for this, and I can only come up with one. Payson, are you having an affair with Sasha?"

"No."

Relief rushed through Kim's body, but it was short lived. If Sasha and Payson weren't in a romantic relationship, there had to be some other explanation for the phone calls, and it was bound to be something Kim didn't want to hear. "Then what is this? It goes back for months, everyday, hours long. Payson, some of these are in the middle of the night. _Why?_"

Kim recognized the look on her daughter's face. Payson was counting breaths in her head like she always did before taking on an apparatus. It was the way she focused her mind, so she was thinking hard about this answer. "You know how whenever something bad happens or you're really upset, you always call dad right away, and just talking to him makes you feel better?" she said. "Or when something really good happens you call and tell him because it's just _better_ if he knows, too? Sasha is that person for me"

Kim felt no less confused than she did when she was alone. "Payson, Mark is my _husband_. Sasha is your _coach_. Those are not even close to being the same. This"—she waved at the bill again—"is completely inappropriate."

"To hell with appropriate, mom! I don't care; I never have. Sasha and I clicked. Are we supposed to pretend like that's not there just because the rest of the world doesn't think it's appropriate?"

Payson's words reminded Kim that these phone conversations were not one-sided. "So what's Sasha's role in all this? You said that you call him the way that I call your dad, but what are you to him?"

"I'm his you," she said. The words didn't make sense, but the meaning did. Sasha saw Payson the same way that Mark saw Kim. As romantic as that might sound, Kim had huge reservations about it, because the way Mark saw her resulted in them getting pregnant with Payson.

She pushed past her discomfort with another question. "Every one of these calls comes from you. Why doesn't he ever call you?" As worried as she was about the calls in the first place, she was even more worried about the fact that Payson almost always initiated them. That indicated that this, whatever _this_ was, was more important to Payson than it was to him, and that led to hearts getting broken.

Payson looked distinctly guilty again. "Well, I'm a lot busier than he is, so if he wants to talk he usually texts to see if I'm free, and then I call him."

"In other words, you call him because you're less likely to get caught that way. You are not making me feel any more confident about this, Pay."

Payson groaned and put her head down on the table. "You don't understand this, mom," she mumbled. She sat up straight again and continued, "I hate hiding this. So does he. I wish that we could be ourselves all the time, that we didn't have to hide our calls and be careful not to spend too much time together in public, or that we could even act the way we want to act when we're by ourselves, but we can't. You fell in love with the boy next door; nobody judged that. Everybody would judge me and Sasha."

Kim prayed to God that she was misinterpreting. "Payson, are you saying that you fell in love with Sasha?"

"I did," she said. Something about the confession made Payson calm again. "Nothing's happened, and nothing is going to happen until after the Olympics, but I'm in love with him. He's in love with me."

"He told you that?" Kim squeaked out. She couldn't talk properly due to the fact that she stopped breathing.

"He doesn't have to, mom. He tells me every day without ever saying the words."

"You're too young for this, Payson," she said. "You're seventeen. You don't even know what love is yet."

Kim was being hypocritical and Payson was quick to point it out. "You were barely older than me when you and daddy got married, and you're still so in love with each other. That's why I know what Sasha and I have is real. I know what love is because you and dad have shown me my entire life."

"Stop being reasonable when I'm trying to be mad at you," Kim said. Payson had an infuriating tendency to do that. "I need you to tell me everything, from the very beginning."

Payson talked. For more than an hour she sat at the counter with Kim and told her everything, from Sasha's first day at the Rock all the way up to him leaving, then the confrontation in Romania and the fast development of their relationship when he came back, and realizing her feelings the night she broke up with Max. She talked about admitting how they felt about each other while they were in Dallas and their their promise to wait for each other. She confessed how much she hated the restriction, even though she knew it was for the best, but told Kim how happy they both were now that they knew they felt the same way. When she finally stopped, Kim was so torn that she wasn't sure she would ever be able to reconcile her emotions.

Kim loved Sasha, and Sasha seemed to love Payson, but in a way that was the problem. There was something unnatural about one of her best friends being in love with her daughter. Other than calling each other in secret, they hadn't actually done anything that Kim could disapprove of, so she couldn't blame them for anything there. She spent a lot of time with the two of them in the office, and nothing had ever suggested any impropriety. Was there anything besides Kim's own discomfort that made the relationship wrong?

She wasn't sure how long she sat there is silence, but Payson broke her reverie. "You're been quiet for a while and I'm not sure if that means the conversation is over. Is it? Because I really need to go call Sasha."

Kim waved her off. Payson was calling Sasha, but Kim had her own phone call to make. She let Mark know that it was safe to come home, and then did busy work until they got back.

Mark sent Kelly and Becca to their rooms when they got to the house, and Kim told him the basics of what she found out. For some reason that Kim didn't understand, he took the revelation better than she did.

"I knew that he was in love with her," he said, "and I figured that Payson would get there eventually, but I had hoped it would take them a few years to figure it out. I didn't realize it had gone so far already."

"You knew?" she questioned. "How? I spend every day with them and I didn't know, so how did you? Was I just completely oblivious?"

Mark stopped to organize his thoughts before he spoke, and it struck Kim how much he and Payson were alike. It was disconcerting, because she always found herself and Sasha to have very similar personalities, so it was possible that Payson and Sasha _were_ as good of a match as Kim and Mark.

"I don't think you're oblivious," Mark said. "The only reason I saw it was because I was looking for it. When that kiss first happened, I thought that maybe Sasha was toying with Payson's emotions, playing games with her, so I watched him. I spent as much time in the rented gym as I could, watching how they acted together, but I didn't expect what I found. I was looking for a man taking advantage of a little girl. What I saw was a man in love with a woman, and he had no idea how he felt."

He kept talking, as much to himself as to her. "I should have realized before. They've been acting so different since he came back from Romania, a little too guarded, but when Payson started dating Max I thought there was nothing to worry about. I obviously underestimated her feelings for Sasha."

"Are you honestly saying that you're okay with this?" Kim asked. She was feeling weak-kneed already, but Mark's acceptance of the situation nearly made her faint.

"No… I guess what I'm saying is that this was inevitable, and if it's going to happen then I want them to do it the right way. I was hoping for a few more years, but at least they're waiting until after the Olympics are over. It's not right for her to be involved with her coach."

"Kim? Mark?"

They both turned to see Kelly standing by the kitchen door, waiting for permission to come in. Kim gave her a weak smile. "Did you need something, sweetie?"

"No, it's just that… Payson told me what happened, and I wanted you to know that there's nothing _bad_ going on. I've been there for almost all of this since I moved in, and Sasha's never tried anything. I've met a lot of scumbag men, so I know how to recognize them, but Sasha's not like that. He's a really good guy."

There was some disquiet in Kelly's eyes, and Kim thought that she was afraid of being taken away from the Rock because of this. She opened her arm and Kelly jetted into the hug. Kim stroked her newfound daughter's hair and whispered, "I know he is, Kelly. Don't worry, nothing's going to change because of this."

Kim thought about Mark's word, _inevitable_. Was he right, was there nothing they could do to stop this? Was acceptance the only thing left? When Kelly pulled tighter into the hug, Kim realized that, yes, acceptance was the only option, because Sasha's presence in their life meant the world to all three of her girls, and there was no way that she could take that from them.

Hours later, Kim made a quick check of the house before bed, and she heard Payson mumbling inside her bedroom. Unable to stop herself, she cracked the door open and surveyed the room. Kelly was asleep, cradling her stuffed tiger, and Payson was hovering halfway between sleep and wake, holding her phone to her ear. Kim could only hear bits and pieces of the conversation, but she could tell that it was nothing special. Nothing explicit, nothing romantic, no grand confessions of love—just two people talking, but it made Payson smile.

Kim took the first step toward acceptance.

o-O-o

Sasha didn't know what to expect. Kim knew everything, but Payson hadn't been able to decipher her mom's feelings on the subject, so it was a toss up whether Sasha would be hugged or murdered when his gym manager got to work. He was hoping for a hug and "welcome to the family." He was betting on murder.

Summer was there first, and it took five minutes for him to realize that she was trying to start a conversation with him, but before he could even try to act interested, Kim came into the office. She didn't look mad, but then again Sasha didn't always look angry when he was, so he still didn't know what was about to happen.

"Summer, could you give Sasha and I some time alone?" Kim asked. No anger in her voice, but that didn't mean anything, either.

The minutes between when Summer left and Kim sat down seemed like hours, but finally she said, "Payson says that you're in love with her. Are you?"

More than the question, what surprised Sasha was the fact that _Payson_ said he was in love with her. They very specifically did not use the 'L' word with each other, but apparently she was willing to use it with other people. He wasn't ready to say it out loud—he wanted the first time he used those words to be with Payson, not her mother—but he said, "Yes, I am."

"And how long have you felt this way?"

The truth wasn't a good answer, but it was the only one he had. "I honestly don't know."

"Okay, then," Kim said, and then started working on the arrangements for the men going to the Winter Cup in early February. It took him several minutes to realize that she was not going to continue, and before he could decide what to do about it, Summer was back. He went downstairs and had a quick non-verbal conversation with Payson and Kelly, the gist of which was that none of them knew what was going on in Kim's head.

He never did find out, but later that day she sought him out and told him that he was spending Christmas Eve at the Keeler house. Not an invitation, an order. Sasha hoped that he would be able to figure her out in the next three days, or Christmas could be very awkward.

* * *

><p>AN: The first part of this chapter has absolutely no bearing on the plot of this story. I just really wanted to write a scene in which Kelly describes Sasha's life in her own special way.

Sasha and Payson have hijacked this story :( They will share the spotlight with Kelly next chapter, though, which is more the way it was supposed to be. Kelly was supposed to be the A-story while Payson and Sasha were the B-story.

Quite a few references managed to sneak their way into this chapter. Friends, Pride and Prejudice, Castle, Center Stage, a nod to The Proposal that is mainly in my head, and 10 Things I Hate About You. If anyone can find the reference from The Proposal, you'll earn about a million awesome points.


	17. Chapter 17

A/N: Where I come from a plain knit hat that covers your ears is called a skull cap, and a beanie is an idiotic hat like Rigo wears. Apparently elsewhere skull caps are called beanies, but I absolutely refuse to put Sasha in something called a beanie, so I settled for the generic term cap.

I'm happy to say that the bit that inspired How to Catch a Man 101 ended up sticking around. If you haven't read that story, it's a little one shot about how Kim caught Mark when they were younger. You should go read it :)

* * *

><p>"Sasha's here!" Becca yelled, running through the house to swing open the front door.<p>

Payson and Kelly came out of their bedroom at a more sedate pace, both a little nervous. Kim insisted that Sasha come to Christmas Eve and 'act normal' so that she could judge his relationship with Payson, and it had the potential to be the start of World War III.

"How do you even know?" Payson asked Becca. "I didn't hear the doorbell ring."

Becca, whose head was sticking out the front door, glanced back at them. "I heard his truck. That thing sounds like an avalanche."

"You know what they say about men who drive big trucks, right?" Kelly muttered under her breath. Unfortunately, Becca heard.

"No, what do they say?" she asked. She closed the door when it became apparent that Sasha was going to help their dad clear the driveway. There was a near-blizzard outside, fulfilling Becca's wish for a white Christmas and then some.

Payson slapped her hand over Kelly's mouth before she had a chance to respond. "Nothing that's appropriate for you to hear." Then she uncovered Kelly's mouth and elbowed her in the ribs. "And he's driving it because it's snowing. It's a sensible car to have in Colorado."

"And he drove it California because…?"

Payson just glared at her. "He lived in a cabin. He needed an off road vehicle, okay?"

A wicked look crossed Kelly's face and her eyes twinkled. She looked like the Kelly from her evil days. "Well, it's not like you actually know, anyway, so who's to say it's not true?"

Oh-ho. Kelly thought she was dealing with the old Payson who would blush and blow it off, but she had changed a lot since their heckling days. "What makes you so sure I don't know?"

Kelly's eyes widened. "You're full of it. You don't know," she said with false confidence.

"Don't know what?" All three girls spun around in surprise as a familiar British voice spoke behind them. Sasha and Mark had apparently finished shoveling the driveway, because they were both standing inside the front door with dripping boots and snow dusting their shoulders.

"Nothing!" Payson and Kelly spoke at the same time, and both had turned a light shade of pink.

Becca rolled her eyes. "They're talking about something that's not 'appropriate' for me to hear," she supplied, using air quotes and a bratty tone. She was either oblivious to the fact that this would get them in trouble, or knew and was doing it on purpose. It was a tossup with Becca these days; she was still half kid and half teenager.

Mark looked at the older girls with suspicion. "What exactly were you saying that isn't _appropriate_ for your thirteen year old sister to hear?"

Kelly and Payson knew better than to answer the question, but Becca didn't. "It was something about men—"

Becca was stopped by two sets of hands covering her mouth at once, and they didn't move their hands away until she glared her acquiescence. Then she pouted; she was just _barely_ young enough to make it look cute instead of whiny. "You know, I'm just going to google it anyway."

Kelly gritted out the side of her mouth, "I'll tell you later, Becs, just shut up about it in front of the big kids."

Payson snorted at Kelly calling Sasha and her dad 'big kids.' It was so true. Both of them acted like overgrown children more often than not.

She waffled about how to greet Sasha. Should she go for the expected quick welcoming hug, or the way she would greet him if they were alone? Kim did tell them to act normal, so she went for option two. She moved closer to Sasha and started unbuttoning his coat. "You're a mess," she said. She pulled the cap off his head and shoved it in his hands. "Coat and boots off, and then go sit by the fire for a while to make sure you're dry. You too, dad."

They both did as she said, which made her grin. Apparently she inherited some of her mom's natural authority.

While they were shedding their outer layers, she left them and headed to the living room, but as she went she put her hands on Kelly's shoulder and whispered, "I totally know."

Kelly stood frozen while Payson walked to the couch, but just before she sat down she was tackled and the two girls fell together against the cushions. "Oh my God, _how_?" Kelly hissed.

They huddled together on the couch and had a quickly whispered conversation that turned Kelly the color of a tomato, and embarrassed Payson just as much, although she managed not to show it on her face. All that Kelly knew about that night at Sasha's apartment was that they both slept on the couch, so hearing the details sent her giggling.

Becca sat down next to them and demanded to know what they were laughing about, so Kelly cupped her hands next to Becca's ear and gave the promised explanation of exactly what people said about men who drive big trucks. Several emotions flickered across the younger girl's face—discomfort, then smugness at having learned something that her friends wouldn't know, and then horror. "What do you mean you _know_?" she exclaimed.

Kelly and Payson both shushed her and Payson resigned herself to telling her little sister something that little sisters should not know. She hated Kelly right then.

The conversation was put to an end by a bright flash. Kim had snapped a picture of them and said something about how sweet they were, cuddled together on the couch like that. For the rest of her life, Payson would look at that picture and laugh. Her mom had no clue what they were talking about in that 'sweet' moment.

Payson hadn't notice the men come in and sit by the fire as she ordered. She cocked her head at Sasha and said, "You look adorable right now, walking around in your socks."

He laughed and countered, "You always look adorable."

"I'm not adorable, I'm beautiful," she said. Something must have possessed her, because she was flirting with Sasha in front of her mom and dad.

"That too."

He seemed to be embracing the 'act normal' thing whole heartedly and was holding nothing back. She wanted to test the limits, but she didn't think that was a good idea.

They had the best Christmas Eve that Payson could remember. It was the normal rambunctious Keeler family event, coupled with the outrageous flirting and genuine affection that defined Payson's relationship with Sasha and Kelly's excitement over her first real Christmas since she was seven years old. Seeing the joy in Kelly's eyes was a better present than anything they could buy each other.

Of course, they did still buy each other gifts.

Tradition was that they each opened one gift on Christmas Eve, and the rest were opened on Christmas morning. There were gifts to Sasha under the tree, and gifts from him as well, but it was unclear if he would be back for Christmas morning. Everything depended on her mom's reaction to the evening.

Kelly insisted that Sasha open his present first, because he was a guest, and that it be the one from her. He tore the paper off the gift and laughed. It was a copy of the A&E version of _Pride and Prejudice_. Ever since she found out about Sasha's house in Derbyshire, she insisted on calling him Mr. Darcy. She said that it fit him—the harsh, proud, self-centered man brought to his knees by a beautiful younger woman who made him want to be a better man. Payson would never admit it out loud, but she agreed with Kelly.

After Sasha they went by age, as they did every year, so Becca was next. She chose the present from her parents—plane tickets back to Minnesota during her friends' spring break up there—and then it was Kelly's turn. They always bullied each other into what present to unwrap, and Becca made Kelly open the gift from her.

Kelly unwrapped the box, but instead of tossing the paper in the trash pile in the center of the room (which was a tradition in and of itself), she folded it and set it beside her. It was a souvenir that she would keep, a symbol of her first happy Christmas in nearly as long as she could remember. When she lifted the lid there was the smallest of gasps, and then silent tears fell from both eyes.

Payson didn't know what the gift was, so she slipped away from her place beneath Sasha's arm and leaned closer to Kelly. It was a picture of Kelly, Becca, and Payson together, taken at the WOGA Invitational, and it was encased in a frame that said 'Sisters.' Kelly continued to cry without a sound.

Becca looked across to Payson with a worried expression, afraid that she'd done something to upset Kelly, but Payson mouthed, "You did good, Becs."

Kim, Mark, and Sasha slinked out of the room to give the three girls some privacy, and as soon as they were gone Kelly's silent tears became sobs. Payson and Becca formed a cocoon around her and let her cry herself out. She took a shaky breath and said, "I'm sorry, guys. I didn't mean freak out on you, you just caught me a little off guard. I love the present, Becca. Thank you so much."

Payson questioned whether she should let the bravado slide, but she decided against it. Kelly obviously had something she needed to get off her chest. "So what happened, Kel?"

She sniffled and said, "Nothing in particular. I just got a little overwhelmed. I've never even had a friend to spend Christmas with, much less sisters. It was always parties and sponsors and 'Smile like you mean it, baby. That's what reels them in.' I always hated Christmas, but this has been so wonderful. I forgot that it could be like this."

"Well, you're not ever going to forget again," Payson promised. "Every Christmas from now on is going to be like this, but eventually you'll realize that we're all insane in this family, so some of the novelty might wear off."

Kelly laughed. It was weak, but a laugh nonetheless, so Payson helped her wipe her face off and then called to the others, "Hey, get back in here so I can open my present!" Kelly's responding laugh was stronger.

Sasha sat down next to Payson and slung his arm around her again, and she leaned into him out of instinct. Part of her wanted to open her present from him, but she knew that wasn't a good idea, and Kelly passed her a present before she even had a chance to think about it.

It was from Kelly, and it was… a lobster. Payson sat on the couch with the box open in her lap, staring at the big, clawed stuffed animal, and a laugh bubbled out of her throat. "There's a card with it," Kelly said, "but, Sasha, you have to close your eyes, because it's a secret."

Sasha dutifully closed his eyes, although not before rolling them, and Payson opened the card that was nestled in the box. There was no picture or Christmas saying on it, just a single hand-written sentence: _His name is Sasha._

Another laugh broke through, and then another, and then she was laughing outright. Kelly made the lobster crawl up Payson's arm and say, "I love you, Payson!" That made her laugh harder, and Kelly joined in, officially breaking all ties that the earlier melancholy held on her.

Payson wiped her watering eyes and said, "God I love you, Kelly. My life is so much more entertaining with you around." Kelly could make her laugh like no one else ever could, even Sasha. It was easy to see how much Kelly needed them when she moved in, but the truth was that Payson needed her just as much. Her life was better when Kelly was around.

"Well, duh, _everybody_'s life is more entertaining with me around. I bring the party."

The girls bantered back and forth for so long that they didn't even notice when Kim and Mark opened their gifts from each other. They were lost in themselves, occasionally including Sasha in their play, but mainly just enjoying a chance to be silly together. None of them were sure how much time passed before their dad intruded on their happy little world by saying, "Well, Sasha, I don't think you'll be going anywhere tonight."

All three girls looked up with a simultaneous "Huh?"

"The snow got worse," Mark explained. "It would probably take us an hour to dig out your truck."

That was gross exaggeration, Payson was sure, but she wasn't going to argue with anything that meant Sasha got to stay there longer. She was enjoying being with him without having to be careful.

"If you're here for the rest of the night," Kelly called, "then we're watching _Pride and Prejudice_!" She climbed over Payson and Sasha to grab the DVD and started opening it without waiting for permission. The rest of them had no choice but to agree.

o-O-o

Mark didn't have to say anything. All it took was a single look to convey his question.

"Yes, yes, I see it," Kim said. "I don't _want_ to see it, but I do."

She had vague expectations for how the night with Sasha would go, and they were all bad. She couldn't imagine a situation in which she would wind up okay with the idea that her best friend was in love with her daughter, and vice versa. Mark forced her into this get together, saying that she needed to see them together before she made any judgments on their relationship. He, like Payson, had an infuriating tendency to be sensible when she wanted to be angry. He also had an infuriating tendency to be right.

She couldn't deny the level of comfort between Payson and Sasha. At one point during the evening Kim sat down next to Mark and leaned into him, only to realize that Payson and Sasha were in the exact same position. They weren't overly affectionate and they didn't ignore those around them in favor of each other, two of Kim's pet peeves in couples, and by all appearances didn't even realize that they were touching. They were just… together.

"Why are you so okay with this?" Kim asked her husband. "She's your little girl, shouldn't you be threatening his life or something like that?"

His eyes twinkled with mischief. "Oh, that part comes later. If they were actually trying to have a relationship right now, he'd already be dead, but this I can deal with. I've just had a lot longer to come to terms with it than you have. I've expected it for months."

"Is _this_ all it's going to stay, though? Do you believe that they'll wait until after the Olympics to start a relationship? She may take after you, but she still has half my genes, and the Wainwright women are not known for their patience."

"Don't I know it," Mark said. Kim wanted to be bothered by his smirk, but it was warranted. She pursued him with single minded determination when she was younger, and when he refused to see her as anything other than the little kid next door, she took matters into her own hands. If Payson was anything like her mother, the word 'platonic' would be out the window in a few weeks. Mark didn't try to deny it. "You're right, Payson is probably just like you, but I think Sasha might be a little stronger than I was. He respects the limits he has as a coach."

Kim narrowed her eyes. "You already talked to him about this, didn't you?"

Mark smirked again. "Of course I did. Did you honestly think I would just let a man—any man, not just Sasha—into my house to spend time with my daughter if I hadn't scared the living daylights out of him already?"

"Don't you ever do that to me again, Mark Keeler!" she said. She punched him in the shoulder for good measure. "I thought I was going nuts because I was so bothered and you were so calm. You had me convinced that I was being wildly irrational."

He pulled her closer by her hips and then snaked his arms around her waist. He kissed her neck and said, "Wildly irrational looks cute on you."

"Mark, really!" She pushed against him, but made no real effort to break away. She liked it exactly where she was. She sank into him and admitted, "She does look happy. And so does he."

"And so does Kelly," Mark pointed out. "Look at them in there."

Kim turned around so that she could see the others in the living room. Sasha had put up no fight against watching _Pride and Prejudice_, so they were all sitting together on the couch while the movie started. He had his arm slung over Payson's shoulder and she was curled into his chest, which wasn't surprising considering the way that had been sitting for most of the evening, but what was surprising was Kelly's position. She was leaning against Sasha's other side with both her arms wrapped around one of his, holding onto him like some sort of giant teddy bear. Neither of them looked uncomfortable with the arrangement. Outside of the gym, Sasha seemed more like an affectionate older brother to Kelly than a coach. In retrospect, they acted the same way inside the gym, but Kim had never connected the dots.

Come to think of it, he hadn't acted any different with Becca or Kelly tonight than he did every day at the Rock. Of all the gymnasts, Payson was the only one who Sasha was reserved with at the gym, and it was like a slap in the face to realize that he had no choice. People watched him like a hawk when he was with Payson, ready to condemn him at the slightest hint of impropriety. Suddenly Kim was ashamed of herself for judging them.

"Come on," Mark said, breaking her reverie. "The popcorn is done, so let's go enjoy Christmas with our family."

"Gladly."

o-O-o

It was well past midnight when Payson slipped out of her bedroom. She didn't need to sneak around to be with Sasha right now, but she thought it was best to do this in private and privacy was hard to come by in such a full house.

He was already asleep, so she laid down on the couch next to him and pushed her body close to his. He thought he was dreaming, so he pulled her closer and buried his face in her hair. She could tell the exact moment he realized she was really there, because he began to inch away from her. She refused to let him go.

He opened his eyes to meet her and she whispered, "Merry Christmas, Sasha."

"Happy Christmas, Payson," he said.

She mumbled under her breath, "So British," but she made sure that she was just loud enough that he could hear her. He pinched her thigh in retaliation.

"Did you wake me up in the middle of the night to make fun of my language?"

"No, I woke you up to give you your Christmas present, brat. But if you don't want it, I can go back to bed…"

He sat up and brought her with him. "I've a got a present for you, too," he said. He crossed to the tree and dug out two large boxes, one from her and one from him. When he sat back down he handed her a gift and said, "You go first."

She tore off the paper and opened the box, and then her breath caught in her throat. She couldn't believe he'd remembered.

"Purple ice skates, just like the ones I had when I was little. Sasha, this is wonderful."

"I'm sorry that there are no Disney Princesses on them," he teased, "but I'm not sure you could pull off that look anymore, anyway."

"You may be right, but I rocked the Princesses when I was five. No kid ever looked so good in ice skates."

A laugh rumbled through his chest while he kissed the top of her head. "And no woman will ever look so beautiful in them. Just don't fall and break your leg, for goodness sake."

"I'm far too graceful for that," she said. She couldn't seem to turn off her flirting while he was in her home like this. She made herself be serious. "Thank you, Sasha. These are amazing. Now it's your turn; open your present."

She had her reservations about her gift, which was a large part of why she was giving it to him when nobody else was around, but her heart said that he would like it. It was a large leather-bound photo album, and it contained more than twenty years of memories from his mom's life.

Sasha's hands ghosted over a picture of his mom as an eighteen year old girl starting in the corps de ballet and showing off her very first costume for _Cinderella_. "Where did you get this?" he asked. "I've never even seen this picture before."

"Viola let me go through all of her old pictures and make copies." Payson had the idea when she saw a picture of Sasha's mom hanging in Viola's studio, a memento of a friendship that Payson could never have understood until Kelly moved in with her. She spent days shuffling through boxes of old photos, digging out any that had Katherine Belov in them while Viola told dozens of stories about her best friend. "There's some other stuff in there, too. Viola has all the originals, but there are some copies of letters and newspaper clippings."

They sat together and flipped through the book, with Payson telling Sasha some of the stories that Viola told her and Sasha telling Payson some of the stories that he grew up hearing. They read the letters that Katherine sent to Viola whenever they were in different countries, most of which revolved around Sasha, her 'darling angel.' Katherine told her friend things in these letters that Sasha didn't even remember, so he and Payson explored his past together. As they moved through time, news articles were added to the pictures and letters, all about Sasha's career and with messages scrawled over them in marker.

They both nodded off while reading Katherine's description of Sasha's fifteenth birthday, and Payson formed a new Christmas tradition, one that she hoped would last the rest of her life: spending the night before Christmas asleep in the arms of the man she loved.

o-O-o

Kim slipped out of Mark's embrace and left the warmth of their bed. It was a secret that he didn't know about—every time she woke in the night or early morning, she crawled out of bed and checked on her children. She had done it since they were tiny babies, and she never could break the habit. She needed that comfort of knowing that her children were safe.

She checked Becca's room first. Asleep Becca still looked like the little girl that Kim wanted her to stay, so she paused to savor the moment. All too soon Becca would be grown up. Next she moved to Kelly and Payson's room, but when she cracked open that door she saw only one sleeping head. Kelly was there, looking like an angel and temporarily free from the pain of her past. Kim surprised even herself with how much she loved Kelly. Kelly had long since stopped being a girl they were giving shelter to and started being a daughter.

But her other daughter was missing.

There was only one place she could be. Kim hadn't expected Payson to sneak out of her room to sleep with Sasha, and she wasn't happy about it. Sleeping together was taking things a little too far. She headed for the living room, intent on waking Payson and ordering her back to bed, but what she saw brought her up short.

They were sleeping together, but that obviously was not the intent. Sasha was leaning into the corner of the couch while Payson rested her head against his chest, there was a book balanced precariously on his knee, and Phoebe was snuggled up next to Payson. It was clear that they fell asleep looking at the book.

She came forward to put the book away before it fell on the floor, and saw what it was. The picture album, the discarded wrapping paper, the box filled with…_purple ice skates?_... it all pointed to the fact that Payson came here not to sleep with Sasha, but to give him his Christmas gift in private. Considering the personal nature of the present, it was understandable to want to share that experience alone together. Kim wouldn't, _couldn't_, rob them of this moment.

Finally, after two weeks of doubt and suspicion, Kim understood. She saw what she had been missing, that Payson was truly, purely happy. Thinking back across the night, she realized that all three of her children were happy, and she couldn't ask for a better Christmas gift.

* * *

><p>AN: There's a little nod to Castle in there. Also, there are pictures of the lobster and the skates up on my pinterest. Merry un-Christmas, ya'll. Next chapter we'll have a Happy un-New Year.


	18. Chapter 18

A/N: Grr, why is it that the chapters that have been planned forever end up being the ones I get seriously blocked on?

Warning: Kelly swears a lot in this chapter.

* * *

><p>As far as Austin Tucker was concerned, 2010 was a great year. He won the American Cup, Nationals, and Worlds, the three most important competitions of a non-Olympic year; he moved to the Rock and found some great friends there; and, best of all, he met Kaylie. She made him realize how empty his life had been when he was hopping from party to party and bed to bed. He never saw the point of a relationship when women threw themselves at him, but he liked being with a girl who needed more from him than sex.<p>

For some reason, Payson didn't look as happy as Austin was. New Year's Eve was supposed to be fun, but Payson looked downright depressed. The break up with Max was still getting to her. She was supposed to have somebody to kiss at midnight, but all she had were memories of a jackass boyfriend who tried to go too far. Austin was so disappointed in Max.

Austin had an idea for how to cheer Payson up, but it would take a little sacrifice on his own part. He pulled Kaylie aside and said, "I know this is our first New Year's Eve together, but would you be upset if we didn't kiss at midnight?"

"Why not?" Kaylie asked, her confusion laced with small amounts of hurt.

"It has nothing to do with us," he promised. "I would love to kiss you tonight, but I think Payson's a little sad. She was supposed to have Max to kiss, but now she's alone, so I thought it might make her feel better to kiss me. Not a real kiss, but just so she doesn't feel left out."

Kaylie glanced over his shoulder to look at Payson. There was no denying that she looked sad, but Kaylie said, "I don't think this is a good idea, Austin. I know you want to help, but you giving her a pity kiss isn't going to make her feel better."

"It isn't a pity kiss!"

"She'll feel like it is."

"Okay, fine, we'll make it into a joke instead," he conceded. "I'll surprise her at midnight, so instead of felling like pity it will just be me making her laugh."

"That's not going to make her laugh, Austin, it's going to make her angry."

He figured that Kaylie might not want him to do it because she wanted to kiss him herself, but he hadn't banked on her thinking that it was a bad idea. "Trust me, Kaylie, this will work. It's like surprising away someone's hiccups."

Kaylie was still doubtful. "I have never met anyone who that actually worked on," she said, but she didn't try to dissuade him anymore, either. "Do what you want, you're going to no matter what I say anyway, but if she hits you, don't come crying to me."

"Well even if she does hit me, angry is better than sad, right?" He used his best roguish grin, but Kaylie didn't fall for it. She turned and walked away, striking up a conversation with Sasha and dismissing Austin.

As it got closer to midnight, Austin sneaked closer to Kelly, Payson, and Lauren. None of them had boyfriends with them, so they stood together in an awkward clump while those around them started counting down.

"Five, four, three—" Austin stood directly behind Payson "—two, one—"

As the crowd cried "Happy New Year," Austin swung Payson around and pressed his lips against hers. He expected wide, surprised eyes and her shoving him, but he got something very, very different. Payson pressed her body against his, grasped his hair with one hand and dug her nails into his shoulder with the other, and drew him into the hottest, most ferocious, most passionate kiss of his life. He was so shocked that he kissed back, and his first unfortunate thought was, _damn, Payson can _really_ kiss_. Then he got the reaction he was looking for—her eyes flew open, she tore her mouth from his, and she shoved his shoulders so hard that they both had to step back.

"What the hell, Austin!"

He was too shocked to manage diplomacy, so he said the worst thing imaginable in the situation, "Me what the hell?—You what the hell! That was a joke, Payson! You weren't supposed to kiss me back!

She stopped short of whatever she was going to yell and sputtered out, "It… it was a knee-jerk reaction. When someone kisses you, you kiss them back!"

"What the hell kind of knee-jerk reaction is that? If some random guy grabs you and kisses you, the right response is to slap him, not shove your tongue down his throat!"

A resounding _smack_ carried across the room. In retrospect, he should have expected the slap. His ears were ringing too loud for him to fully understand what she said after that, but he thought it was, "Well sorry, I guess my _right_ response was a little delayed."

She ran from the room, and he was dismayed to realize that she was crying. From now on he was going to listen to Kaylie, because she was right. This was a bad idea.

o-O-o

Kaylie watched in horror as her boyfriend did one of the stupidest things imaginable. He was impossible when he got an idea in his head like that, but she tried to hold onto the shred of hope that he was right and she was wrong, because otherwise this would be a disaster.

All of that hope was dashed just before the countdown started, when Payson looked over her shoulder, past Austin, and locked eyes with someone else across the room. Longing passed over her friend's face, more profound than anything Kaylie had ever felt, and she understood where Payson's sadness that night stemmed from. It wasn't about Max, it was about the man staring back at her, just as desperate for her as she was for him.

Kaylie tried to signal to Austin, but he was facing the other direction and the countdown had already started. Time seemed to slow down as she watched Austin grab Payson's arm and swing her around to kiss him, and as Payson responded with a fervor Kaylie didn't think her capable of. Austin kissed her back, a fact that Kaylie filed away to be pissed about later, and in slow motion Payson stiffened and pushed him away.

The whole room stared at them as they yelled at one another, and every single face winced when they heard the whip crack sound of her slap. Kaylie hurried to Austin's side. Half of his face was red and swollen, and would likely bruise, but she ignored that. She just needed to stop Kelly from chasing after Payson.

"Stop," Kaylie said, grabbing Kelly's wrist to keep her still. "Let me go instead. I know you're her best friend, but it was my idiot boyfriend that did this, so I need to be the one to fix it." She expected some protest, but Kelly nodded and stepped aside.

There were dozens of places in the Cruz house that Payson could be, but there was only one that made sense. She would seek familiar ground, someplace that was comforting to her, and nothing comforted Payson more than a gym, even a small one like they had at the Cruz house. Kaylie ran to that room and found Payson sitting in the dark, huddled against the wall with her knees pulled to her chest.

Kaylie sat down next to her and mimicked her position, and then stayed quiet until Payson's soft crying died down. It gave her time to deal with her discovery, because it was unexpected and disturbing and yet somehow it made complete sense. Of all the people Payson could fall for…

"You thought he was Sasha, didn't you?"

Payson let her head fall against her knees and whispered, "I'm such an idiot."

"No, Austin's an idiot," Kaylie said. "You're… emotional."

"Is that your nice way of saying delusional?"

"No. I saw Sasha's face when you looked at him. You're not delusional." She paused, unsure of how far she should go, and then asked, "How long have you been together?"

Payson met Kaylie's eyes and swore, "We're not together, Kaylie. I won't pretend like we don't have feelings for each other, because obviously you've figured that out, but that doesn't mean that we're acting on them."

The kiss _did_ have a ring of desperation to it which fit with Payson's story. "So if you aren't together, why did you think that he was kissing you?"

Payson groaned and dropped her head back to her knees. "I didn't think, I reacted. I was thinking about Sasha and then all of a sudden Austin kissed me, and it was just so unexpected that I—I—" she stuttered to a stop and then started again. "It didn't feel real, it didn't make sense. I wanted it to be Sasha so badly that I let myself believe it."

"When did this happen?" Kaylie asked. "How long have you… had feelings for each other?"

"I'd tell you if I could, Kay, but I don't know. I'm starting to think it's been that way since the beginning. I've had a crush on him since I was seven, so maybe it all just grew from there."

"Okay, I can see that. It's Sasha, so eww, but it makes sense for you." It took Payson's offended look for Kaylie to realize how that came off. "Sorry, I meant eww because he's our coach, and that has just never had the same meaning for you as it does for the rest of us. So I get you, but what about him?"

Payson's eyes, though watery, were full of fondness when she spoke. "He says that he was in awe of me. I was so proud that first day he came here because he knew my name, but it turned out that he knew _everything_ about me. He's been following my career since my first Junior Nationals. He told me that he's never been so fascinated by anyone in his life."

Kaylie pushed aside the part of her that was jealous about that, much like she pushed aside the part of her that was jealous that Austin had never kissed her the way he kissed Payson. She knew that kiss with Austin was fake, and she knew that Sasha was just as dedicated to her, Lauren, and Kelly as he was to Payson. The other stuff… well, as far as she was concerned, that was between Payson and Sasha and it was none of her business. She didn't particularly want to think about it.

"I'm sorry my boyfriend's a jerk," she said, wrapping an arm around Payson's shoulders.

Her friend leaned against her and said, "So am I."

o-O-o

Austin had lost his taste for the party. His face hurt like hell, he made one of his best friends cry, and his girlfriend probably wouldn't speak to him for a week. He sure started 2011 off with a bang—a bang like shooting himself in the foot.

He was tired of trying to explain himself to a bunch of people who really shouldn't be asking questions in the first place, so he grabbed a bottle of tequila from the cabinet he knew Mrs. Cruz hid her liquor in and headed outside. The ground was a soggy mess from the remainders of the Christmas snow, but Austin ignored the mud and trudged across the lawn. He was going to sit out in the cold where nobody would look for him and get drunk.

Apparently someone else had the same idea.

"Geez, Kelly, what are you doing out here? You're going to freeze to death." Kelly was sitting on the very bench that Austin had planned to occupy, but she was in even worse attire to be outside than he was. Her dress did nothing to shield her from the wind, and her bare arms and legs were nothing compared to the idiocy of her bare feet, which were dangling in the mushy snow and turning blue. He hurried to wrap his jacket around her shoulders and realized that she had a tequila bottle of her own. It was half empty.

"What the hell did you do, chug the bottle?" he asked. "How do you manage to drink that much in such a short amount of time?"

She didn't answer and he was seriously concerned about her safety out in the cold like this, so he picked her up and carried her across the Cruz's yard and around the front to his car. He placed her in the passenger seat and then turned his heat on as high as it would go while he rubbed her arms to get the circulation going in them.

"You're a real asshole, you know," she said out of the blue.

"Yeah, I do know, but what in particular makes me an asshole right now? As far as I can tell, I'm the guy saving your toes from falling off."

She took another swig from her bottle, which he couldn't believe she'd held onto all the way to his car, and said, "Kissing Payson like that. You ruined her New Year's."

"I noticed. The swollen half of my face clued me in, but that doesn't explain why you're trying to commit suicide by frost bite." Payson and Kelly were close, but not close enough for Payson's bad night to send Kelly over the edge like this. This, whatever it was, had nothing to do with Payson and everything to do with Kelly.

"If I was trying to commit suicide I'd already be dead. Freezing to death takes too long. You've gotta do it quick before some idiot tries to save you," she said. The part that scared the shit out Austin wasn't what she said but the fact that she sounded completely serious while she said it.

"Kelly, have you _thought_ about this before?"

She took another swig of tequila and fixed him with a stony stare. "Yes."

He started to say something—though he didn't know what—but she cut him off and said, "Can you just get me out of here?"

He didn't give it a second thought; he just put his car in gear and drove. They were halfway to his house before she spoke again. "2010 is over. Some of the best things in my life happened this year."

"And some of the worst," he said. Finally he understood where her behavior was coming from. She had to be remembering some horrible things tonight. His mom and dad were crap parents, but at least they never hit him. Kelly would have to live with those memories for the rest of her life.

He was looking at the road instead of her, but her tone was enough to freeze his soul when she said, "No, Austin, they didn't. The things that happened this year, they don't even come close. This year was all sunshine and fucking roses compared to my worst."

He didn't know what to say, so he didn't say anything. If being at the Rock taught him anything, it was that he needed to keep his mouth shut a lot more often than he did.

When they reached his house he carried her in and put her down on the couch while he went and filled his bathtub with warm water. He texted Payson to let her know what happened and then went back to get Kelly. She was still on the couch, but she appeared to be unconscious.

She wasn't _quite_ passed out, and he was experienced enough with drunk people to know that she was okay, at least from an alcohol standpoint, but the hypothermia was still an issue, so he ignored her drunken mumbling and carried her to the bathroom. When he dropped her in the tub, she went from half passed out to wide awake in a heartbeat.

"Shit!" she yelled, flailing around and splashing water all over him and his bathroom. "What the hell are you doing, you bastard? You can't just go around throwing people in bathtubs!"

"I get that you're too drunk to feel much of anything right now, but let me clue you in. You were just sitting out in the snow with no coat or shoes. If you don't get warm you're going to be in serious trouble."

"And the concept of a blanket has escaped you?" she yelled.

He kept calm so that he didn't rile her up any more. "That's not good enough, Kelly. If you've got frostbite then you need the water. Unless you want to give up gymnastics because you lost your pinky toe to the snow, you'll stay put."

She replaced her fighting with pouting. "Well if you're going to force me to take a bath will you at least leave so I can take my dress off?"

"Nope."

"Well why the hell not?" she screamed. She was back to fighting again.

"Because aside from your brilliant attempt to freeze your fingers off, you also downed a bottle of tequila. If I leave you now you'll pass out and drown. Get used to the wet clothes."

He thought she would try to get up and leave, but she crossed her arms like a petulant child and mumbled, "Bastard." He supposed she was either so drunk that it didn't occur to her that she could leave or she finally realized that she was freezing, literally, and the warm water helped.

She closed her eyes and leaned back in the tub, and Austin was content to let her sleep as long as she didn't slip under the water. He sat down on the floor and dipped his fingers in the water every once in a while to check the temperature. Kelly didn't bother to talk to him until the water cooled to room temperature and he hauled her back out.

"Here," he said, handing her his bathrobe. "Take your wet clothes off and put this on. I'll go find you something to wear."

He was halfway out the door when she asked him, "Why are you doing all this?"

"Because somebody needs to." Kelly called him an asshole earlier and she was probably right, but he wasn't enough of an asshole to leave a girl to pass out drunk in the snow. She needed someone to take care of her and right now he was it.

He dug around in his drawer looking for anything that looked like it might fit Kelly but found nothing. She needed warmth, and everything he owned would be too loose to keep her warm, but it would have to do. He grabbed a pair of drawstring pants and a sweatshirt and took them to her.

She came out of the bathroom looking dwarfed by his clothes but a little more alert. She stood fidgeting by the door, clearly unsure what to do and say, and he didn't have much of an idea either, so he just handed her a pair of wool socks and motioned for her to sit down on the bed.

She sat down and started putting on the socks but said, "You know this is really gross, right? Wearing you clothes is bad enough, but your socks? I'm probably going to get a fungus."

He ignored the snippiness. "So what's going on, Kel?

"What's going on is that you're a jackass with a hero complex. Other than that, it's none of your damn business."

"Fair enough," he said. He grabbed a blanket off the bed and wrapped it around her tightly. "Look, you can talk to me or not, it's your choice and I won't push you, but I am about to get my hero complex on. Get in the bed and I'm going to take care of you for the rest of the night."

Kelly wouldn't be Kelly if she wasn't snarky. "Who appointed you queen of the universe? Why should I do anything you say?"

"Two reasons… One, you're too drunk to drive and your car's back at Kaylie's house anyway, so you're stuck here, and two, I'm bigger than you."

She mumbled some language that would have made a sailor blush but climbed under the blankets anyway. He tucked her in like a child and went to get her a bottle of water, and by the time he got back from the kitchen she was asleep. He sat the water on the table beside the bed and pulled up a chair so that he could keep an eye on her while she slept.

He was nodding off when Kelly's sleepy, slightly slurred voice, said, "Hey Austin?"

"Yeah?"

"Thanks. You're still an asshole, but thanks for making sure that my toes didn't fall off."

* * *

><p>AN: Not a very happy New Year's for the Rock girls :( It's probably the single worst day of the year for Kelly, but at least she has good friends and a family now to support her.

Dresses on pinterest.


	19. Chapter 19

A/N: The title "Kaylie Cruz's personal chair" is not mine. I'm pretty sure it came from a discussion with Creatively Licensed B.

* * *

><p>Payson came into the living room carrying a bowl of popcorn and a bag of chips. They were eating junk food in honor of a special occasion.<p>

It was Super Bowl Sunday. Payson couldn't care less about football, though Kelly seemed to be into it, but the Rock girls, Sasha, Austin, and Heather were nonetheless gathered in the Keeler's living room to watch the game. Well, not really the game. The commercials.

Shortly after Payson and Kelly signed with James Jansen, he came to them with the idea of joint sponsorships. He cultured individual media personalities for each of them—sophistication and glamour for Payson, teenage dream for Kelly—but together they were simply presented as friends. There were some big name companies that ate it up, but James was selective about whose contracts they accepted.

He didn't want their faces overused, so he accepted one major endorsement deal for each of them and one for them to do together, then smaller, though still lucrative, contracts with less print work. Payson was stuck with the Healthy Bar deal until October, but she also had her major contract with Chanel, a small ad for Victoria's Secret VSX Sport line, the obligatory GK sponsorship, and product placement deals with Tiffany's, Jimmy Choo, and Lexus. Kelly had the far more normal line up of the Candie's clothing line, Subway, and GK, with product placement for Sketchers and Kobalt. And then together…together they had the Gap.

It wasn't Payson's only multi-million dollar deal, but it was definitely the biggest. It was also the only endorsement that put her in a Super Bowl commercial. This might be the most surreal day of Payson's life so far.

She sat down on the floor and leaned against Sasha's legs, belatedly realizing that the touch was too familiar for such a public gathering. Her family, Heather, and Kaylie all knew about her relationship-in-limbo with Sasha, but Austin and Lauren were in the dark. There was no way to get out of the situation without drawing attention, though, so she tried to act as if it was a coincidence that Sasha's legs happened to be behind her when she sat down.

Payson narrowed her eyes when she realized that Kelly was sitting in the same position a few feet away, but she was resting against _Austin's_ legs. She'd watched Kelly and Austin closely over the past month, and she was certain that there was nothing there except friendship, but Payson still had her concerns. She and Sasha started out as friends and look where that went. But then again, maybe she and Sasha never really were just friends.

Kelly had gone someplace dark in the couple of days before New Year's, and Payson didn't know why. She drew away from her friends and family and retreated into her own head, leaving behind the happiness that had characterized their Christmas together. It all reached a peak on New Year's Eve. Austin didn't give up many details about what happened that night, but Payson knew it involved alcohol and being out in the snow, and that Austin had been more worried than he let on. Whatever he did or said, though, it helped. Kelly came out of the dark corners of her mind.

The two had forged a friendship since then, only made stronger when they flew to L.A. together for a Kobalt publicity function. Kaylie was showing a spectacular level of maturity by not being jealous. She and Austin did have a fight after New Year's, but Payson was pretty sure that _she_ was the subject of that argument, not Kelly. Still, there was a potential disaster associated with Austin and Kelly's friendship.

They didn't have an exact time that the commercial would play, but they knew it was some time in the second half. In the meantime Mark and Kelly watched the game and argued (they were rooting for different teams), Kim played referee between the two, and the rest of them generally made fun of each other. Austin got a lot of ribbing for being, as Lauren put it, "Kaylie Cruz's personal chair." The fact that Kaylie was sitting with her legs draped over his thighs did nothing to maintain his dignity. Since he was desperately looking for any kind of distraction from the teasing, he was the first one to notice when the commercial came on.

The main ad was sandwiched between opening and ending clips which would be cut out later, but for the Super Bowl they aired the entire commercial. The joke centered around the idea of them aspiring toward London. It began with them walking down a flight of stairs obviously meant to be part of the London Underground. They're dressed in workout gear and talking about how amazing it would be if they were back there in 2012, although the script was careful to not explicitly mention the Olympics, and then they sprint across a platform to catch their train. The words "MIND THE GAP" are printed on the door while a voice recording announces it overhead, and as they step through the doors they are magically wearing preppy, brightly colored Gap clothing.

This began the second part of the commercial, where Payson and Kelly are in a white train car with "MIND THE GAP" printed across the wall in huge letters. Pop music plays and there is a group of similarly dressed men and women performing choreographed dance moves across floor, seats, and even off the walls and support rails in the train car. Payson and Kelly join in the dancing and bounce around the room throwing huge tricks. When the train shutters to a stop, the girls laugh together and step back off to another intonation of "please mind the gap." The end tag to the ad shows them outside the train, eyeing each other's new clothes incredulously as they realize that what happened on the train was real.

Heather squealed and tackled Payson when it was over, crying out, "That was so awesome! I can't believe that two of my best friends were just in a commercial during _the Super Bowl_. I'm so proud of you guys!"

Heather's enthusiasm was, as always, contagious and the whole room devolved into a chaos of congratulations and excitement. Payson would never admit it out loud, but she was just as amazed by the commercial as Heather was. Being in print ads or in aired competitions was one thing, but being on TV during one of the most watched events of the year was another thing altogether. The next time she had an audience this huge would be in London a year and a half away.

Kelly was dazed. Payson managed to scoot over next to her and bump their shoulders together. "What's up?" she asked.

"I can't believe that I was really just on TV doing a double back off a train seat," Kelly said.

"Yeah, and I can't believe they paid us seven mil a piece to do it." She made more money on this one endorsement than her dad probably would in his entire life. Not that she kept it all for herself, but no matter how much she gave to her parents or to charities, she was still bloody rich.

Kelly pursed her lips in thought. "You know, not that I'm complaining about this, but I don't get why my mom was chasing all these lowball endorsements like Healthy Bar when she could have got this."

Payson was the only one who noticed that Kaylie seemed very interested in the game all of a sudden. Heathy Bar was a lowball endorsement for Payson, Kelly, and Austin, and Payson was now stuck with it, but Kaylie had legitimately campaigned for that deal at one point and it would have been a major contract for her. It was still uncomfortable for the one-time National Champ to deal with her relative unimportance in their circle.

Lauren stepped into the conversation, "I don't think she could, Kel. She was trying to sell someone who didn't exist, and the fake you was kind of creepy. The Gap and Candie's want cool, not creepy."

Kelly looked bothered, but she shook it off and joked, "I've always been cool. The problem was that you weren't cool enough to recognize it. You had to raise to my level first."

Payson jumped in with a subject change before Kelly and Lauren could get into one of their baffling bitch-off games. It was all in good fun, but it got very confusing very fast for the rest of them. She asked Heather how photography club was going and let her exuberant friends draw all of the attention on herself. While Austin of all people got into a debate with Heather about the merits of sepia versus black and white, Payson took the chance to lean into Kelly and whisper, "I can't believe this really happened."

"I know," Kelly said. She reached out and twisted her pinky finger with Payson's. "This is the real deal, Pay. We're not just two more GK girls. We're Gap and Chanel and Candie's. This is a huge step toward London."

She was right. The NGO's ultimate goal was publicity, and Payson and Kelly brought that to new levels. The road to the Olympics might have started at Worlds, but these endorsements kept them moving. "One step," she whispered back. "And we'll take the rest of them together, just like we did with this."

o-O-o

It was the first National Team practice since before Worlds, and Payson wasn't sure how it was going to play out. A lot had changed during their short off-season, including Kelly's move, Payson's massive rise back to power in the gymnastics world, and the Rock girls' status on the team. Ellen Beals made sure to keep them at the bottom, but now nobody could say that they didn't deserve to be there. After Beals had cultivated so much contempt on the team, there was no telling how the other girls would react to the Rock's success.

There was a crowd in the lobby when Kelly and Payson walked into the gym. At first she thought something had happened, but they all seemed to be looking at the wall. Payson edged closer and felt very self-conscious when she realized what they were staring at. There was a group of large photographs hanging in the lobby, one of each of the girls and then a group shot from the photo shoot with Teren Oddo. There was no doubt that these were professional, high fashion pictures. The other team members wore a mixture of admiration and jealousy.

Payson turned around and walked into the gym without acknowledging the crowd. Nobody had noticed them yet, so she and Kelly managed to escape with dignity. Lauren and Kaylie weren't so lucky. They were talking when they came in and got waylaid by the crowd. The gossipy chatter could be heard all the way inside the gym where Kelly and Payson were stretching.

All it took was one shout from Sasha to send everyone scurrying into the gym, but that brought new problems. A group of Kelly's old cronies approached them, led by none other than Tessa Grande.

"I see you're slumming it now, KP. Trying to get back some of your old glory by hanging with America's favorite pity project?"

For the first time since they'd known each other, Kelly didn't have a snappy comeback. She was too shocked by Tessa's treachery to defend herself or her friends, so Payson did it for her. "Yeah, Tesssa, she's slumming it with her fellow World Champions. But if we're considered slumming it, what on _earth_ was she doing when she was hanging out with you? Growing mold?"

Rather than engaging in a battle of wits (probably because she didn't have any), Tessa moved on to petty accusation. "I never got a chance to congratulate you for winning at Worlds, did I, Payson? Well congratulations. How many men did you have to sleep with to make that happen?"

This snapped Kelly out of her silence. She was always quick to defend Payson and Sasha now, partly because of the genuine love and respect she felt for them, but also partly out of guilt because she propagated many of those rumors. "Wow, you're so behind on your gossip, Tessa. Everybody knows this. She screwed all thirty two judges."

Payson barked out a laugh. Tessa wasn't the first one to make that accusation and Payson still didn't understand it. A lot of people believed that she slept with Sasha, which she could admit now was a reasonable assumption, but Kelly pointed out the key problem in the 'slept her way to the top' theory. At most sleeping with Sasha could have bought her more attention than the other Rock girls, but that would be no different than any of the gymnasts who were the sole National Team members at their gyms. How, though, could Payson having sex with Sasha affect her chances at an international medal? As Kelly suggested, she would have to sleep with the entire judging panel to gain any advantage by promiscuity. Kelly's sarcasm pointed that out far better than any serious argument would.

Tessa wasn't the sharpest knife in the drawer, though, so this went a bit over her head. "Do you think you'll be able to stay off your back long enough for practice, Payson? Or on your feet long enough to finish a routine? You seem to have injuring yourself down to a science."

"Really stop to think about that, Tess," Payson said. Tessa hated that nickname, so Payson would be sure to call her by it every time they spoke. "You're pointing out that I'm better injured than every other girl in the world is when they're healthy. Are you sure that's an insult?"

Tessa channeled all of Kelly's old hauteur and said, "Maybe you're right. Maybe you really are _the best thing that's ever happened to gymnastics_"—Her words had a distinctive ring of derision—"but that makes Kelly, what, your sloppy seconds?"

Tessa's attention, and that of her sidekicks, turned to Kelly, who said, "Remind me, Tessa, what is your international ranking? Oh, silly me, I forgot. You're not ranked at all, because you've never competed at an international level. Nice hair, by the way. Very original."

The younger girl was still wearing a copy of Kelly's infamous devil horns. Payson thought that was rather stupid considering that she no longer even liked Kelly, but that hairstyle did fit nicely with evil, so perhaps it was fitting. Becca created Kelly's new signature hairstyle, side twists pulled back into a messy bun, and the twists on either side of her head gave the illusion of a halo. It was an interesting juxtaposition, the devil and the angel facing off.

Kelly and Payson saw Sasha approach their group but Tessa did not, so when he cleared his throat behind her, she jumped a foot in the air. Sasha smirked and asked, "Is there a problem here, girls?"

"I don't have a problem," Payson said. "Kelly, do you have a problem?"

"No, I don't have a problem," she said. "Tessa, do you have a problem?"

Tessa didn't quite manage their cool façade when she said, "No, no problem here." She recognized that the other two were mocking her, but there was nothing she could do with Sasha standing right there, so she stomped off in a huff.

Sasha smirked at them. "Making friends, I see. It's so nice to see you mentor the younger girls on the team."

"Oh, shove it." Payson was the only one who could get away with saying something like that to him. "She doesn't need mentoring, she needs to be taken down a few pegs. She thinks she can use mind games to claw her way up the ranks."

Kelly stared after her former protégé and said, "She's an ungrateful little thing, isn't she? She never would have made it to 7th if I hadn't worked with her so much, and now she's turned on me."

"Well, what did you expect, Kelly? You trained her to be a bitch. I'd say you were incredibly successful."

Sasha said, "Well, if you do want to knock her down a peg, here's your chance. We're re-ranking today. Get ready to showcase your upgrades."

"Excellent." Kelly's grin showed hints of her old evil. Tessa was sure to have upgrades as well, but they would be nothing compared to what the Rock girls brought to the table.

Sasha walked to the center of the floor and hollered, "On the line, now!" A dozen girls fell into place on the boundary line and stood at attention. Sasha continued, "I expect that you have all made upgrades to your routines in the months since we last met. I also expect that there will be some changes in rank this weekend to accompany those upgrades, and to that end, this morning will be dedicated to an exhibition of your skills. You have half an hour to warm up and then we will begin on vault. Don't waste your time."

Some girls looked excited and others looked terrified. Kaylie just looked uncomfortable. She knew where she would fall in the ranks and it would be galling to hear it out loud.

There was a buzz of speculation when they gathered at the vault. Re-rankings were terrifying, but also a great source of gossip. Sasha made them draw for order and asked everyone with two vaults to perform both. Before that had been Payson, Kaylie, and Andy. Now Lauren and Aaricka were added to that list. Aaricka's coach was obviously making the same ploy as Sasha—double specialties for a girl who wasn't a real All Around contender.

Nobody was surprised with Payson's Amanar and half on, one and a half off. She had added an extra half twist on the Yurchenko which was an accomplishment, but not one that shocked anybody. Kelly upgraded to the Amanar, too, and Kaylie's vaults hadn't changed. She was at her physical limit with the two she already had. Lauren, on the other hand, awed the room.

Her old vault of a tucked one and a half twisting front was a very good, but her upgrade to a pike added two tenths of a point to her DOD and she would eventually upgrade to a stretch. Her new second vault, a Tsukahara double, would definitely be enough to get her into the finals in an international competition and if she could manage to get it to a two and a half before the Olympics, she could give Payson and Ivanka both a run for their money.

Kaylie and Lauren had been running neck and neck on vault for more than a month, but by Payson's scoring, Lauren came out on top. Sasha confirmed it by saying, "Here are the top six rankings for the vault: Payson, Lauren, Kaylie, Kelly, Aaricka, and Andrea. I expect you all to be ranked on at least one apparatus today, and if you aren't… If you aren't, then you better think long and hard about your place on this team."

This was new, and a few of the girls looked worried. Payson was gratified to see that they all belonged to Tessa's gang.

They moved on to bars, and this was where the fun began. By luck of the draw, Kelly was first. She won the bronze at Worlds, behind Genghi Cho and Payson, but the set she performed for their team was better than Genghi's gold medal performance. Whistles and whispers flitted through the group as they watched her, and their teammates applauded when she was finished. They might be competing against each other, but they all recognized the importance of performances like that for their country.

The team really brought it on bars, with nearly everyone showing at least some small upgrade, and Beth in particular came out with a great set that was second on to Kelly amongst their group. Payson was the second to last person up.

She never knew what was going on around her when she was on an apparatus, but she noticed something out of the ordinary after she dismounted. It took her several seconds to realize what it was—a complete absence of sound. Sasha was the first one to say anything.

"That was very good, Payson, but you've got to point your toes in that forward pike. I shouldn't have to remind you."

She wanted to laugh. She wasn't certain if he did it on purpose or not, but pointing out one tiny error in the hardest bars skill in the world made him sound like an impossible-to-please hard ass. Of course, he actually was an impossible-to-please hard ass, which was part of why his gymnasts were so good.

His criticism broke the silence and she was bombarded with questions and praise. Sasha let it happen for about two minutes before he cleared his throat and drew everybody's attention. "I am very glad to see you supporting each other so much, but we do still have one more girl to perform. Tessa, if you would." He waved Tessa to the apparatus. It was a very good set, one that Sasha ended up ranking at fifth, but coming right after Payson, it looked like a joke.

The beam was a similar success for the Rock. Lauren and Payson blew away the competition and Kaylie performed at her old, pre-anorexia level, placing them one, two, and three, respectively. Kelly was a decent fourth and Aaricka pulled out the second half of her double-threat with a fifth place ranking. It was a pity her strengths were the same as Lauren's, because the only way she would make the Olympic team would be if Lauren was injured.

Floor went exactly as planned, with the five girls who competed in the World prelims taking the top five spots again. Payson and Kelly wowed the team again with their upgrades, and Anna got in huge trouble when she muttered the word "skank" as Payson took the floor. Her punishment got bigger laughs than her insult did.

Sasha made them all sit on the floor while he had a brief conference with the assistant coaches—except for Anna, who was climbing the ropes. When he came back he stood above them while they sat, and Payson wondered if he was trying to intimidate them with the way he towered over them. It worked for most gymnasts.

"The assistant coaches and I have come to a unanimous agreement regarding the team rankings. I congratulate each of our World Team members for staying on top. Payson, Kelly, Kaylie, Lauren, Beth, and Andrea make up the top six in that order. Following them are Aaricka, Kinsley, Tessa, Jessica, Kacey, and Anna. You are all dismissed to lunch, but Kacey, Anna, I'd like to see you in my office before you go."

Beth whistled low under her breath as the two girls followed Sasha upstairs. "Wow, I don't envy them right now. What do you think he's going to do to them?"

"Probably just scare the shit out of them for now," Kelly said. "You're right though, I don't envy them. He's going to work them hard this weekend."

Kacey and Anna were two of Tessa's group, and they were the only two members of the team not to be ranked on an apparatus. Tessa was only ranked on bars, as was her other crony, Jessica. "I bet Tess is regretting all the crap she said this morning since she dropped two ranks today," Payson said.

"I'm pretty happy about that change," joked Aaricka, "since it means I came up two. Do you guys realize that if the Olympics were this summer it would be the eight of us? You five on the team and then me, Andy, and Kinsley as alternates."

The 'you five' she was talking about were the Rock girls and Beth, and she was completely right. Beth, as a bars and floor specialist, was the perfect complement to Lauren, and the other three each had holes they could fill if there was an injury.

Payson smiled around at them. "I think we would make a pretty awesome team, so let's make sure we keep it this way. We've got juniors coming up this year and next, so we can't get complacent. We've got to keep making upgrades and keep competing as much as possible. Today was just a step in the right direction."

"Wow, Pay, if you keep cranking out pep talks like that, we're going to have to give you a megaphone and some pompoms. Are you trying to steal Kaylie's spot as captain?" Lauren said. In the past this might have been a snide remark, but Payson recognized it for the joke it was.

Kaylie grimaced. "Ugh, she can have it. I'm done with the captain stuff. It's too stressful. I'd rather sit back and let someone else give _me_ the pep talk."

"Great, so it's Captain Keeler. Everyone agree?" Lauren looked to the other girls and suddenly Payson found herself named team captain. Tessa and her friends were sure to dissent, but majority ruled on the team.

The rest of the girls went to retrieve their lunches, leaving Payson stunned in the middle of the gym. Kelly approached her and Payson said, "I don't understand what just happened."

"Another step toward London, that's what happened," Kelly said. "One step at a time, right?"

Payson grinned when she realized that Kelly was referencing their conversation the weekend before. She held up her pinky to link with Kelly's and repeated, "One step at a time. Together."

* * *

><p>AN: Last chapter marked the end of my fully plotted outline, so I spent a lot of time these past few weeks doing more outlining. I'm happy to say that the 2011 calendar is now filled out!


	20. Chapter 20

A/N: As you may have noticed, I had writer's block. The worst writer's block of my life, actually. I didn't write anything for days on end and the few days I did write were only a couple of hundred words. I got to the point that I was afraid I'd lost my ability to write altogether. The other story I'm posting helped me break through it.

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><p>As Payson stood taking a photo with Kelly and Austin, all she could think about was how happy she was. Winning the American Cup was part of that, but only a small part. The old saying 'count your blessings' had no meaning for her because she had far too many to count. Her family, her friends, Sasha, her career, and not the least, her body. She appreciated that more than most because she knew what it felt like to be broken. She was especially appreciating it today, because her back was what kept her out of the last American Cup. Her 2009 American Cup title held special meaning for her because it was her first competition as a senior, and watching it happen without her in 2010 had stung. It felt good to reclaim her title at last.<p>

When the photographers finally set them free, Kelly held up her silver medal to examine it more closely. "I can only imagine what my mom would say about me getting the silver this year. She was _barely_ satisfied by the gold last year. It was too close a shave, she said."

"Screw your mom," Austin said. "It doesn't matter what she would say. You were awesome today and you deserve to celebrate, so let's dance." He grabbed her hand and pulled her to the center of the room. Kelly wasn't disappointed with the silver, Payson knew. She just had her mom in her head and Austin was great at fixing that. He had a definite talent for getting people out of funks, which was useful in a group full of girls. All of them had needed his help at one point or another.

Since Kelly and Austin were out on the dance floor causing a scene, Payson bit the bullet and made a few mingling rounds. She hated that sort of thing, but James said that it was necessary, so she tried her best to be nice to all the simpering idiots who wanted to mooch off her success. Austin was naturally great at it and Kelly was well practiced, but Payson was just good enough as an actress to pull it off without offending anybody. She was getting better at it with time.

She forced herself to speak with all of the FIG officials and main endorsers before she retreated to the comfort and safety of Sasha. He was standing with Marty, who was newly reinstated as an assistant coach for Team USA, a few NGO board members, and the women's coaches from Romania and France. She was immediately accosted with congratulations.

"We were just talking about you," one of the NGO men confessed.

"Nothing bad, I hope?" she joked. Austin had been giving her PR lessons.

Gavril Radulescu, the Romanian head coach, said, "On the contrary, Sasha was just saying that you are the most talented gymnast he has ever coached. I told him that he is doing a great disservice to our country by saying so."

Austin's lessons hadn't taught her how to respond to Gavril's joke, so she looked past it and focused on Sasha's compliment. "I'm flattered," she said. She flashed a brilliant smile at him. "I only hope that I can live up to his expectations."

"Always," Sasha said. "You more than live up to them. You exceed them every single day."

She blushed and was glad for a distraction by way of a waiter coming by with hors d'oeuvres. He asked if he could get her anything and she said, "No, but you can do me a favor." She reached forward and plucked Sasha's drink out of his hand and placed it on the waiter's tray. "Take that back. He won't be drinking it."

If she'd been paying close enough attention, she wouldn't have even let him order it. After Sasha, Marty, and Austin got blitzed while Payson and Kelly were in Dallas for Nastia's party, the girls had been controlling Austin and Sasha's alcohol flow. Sasha had a three drink limit and he was on his fourth.

The men with them looked scandalized, but Sasha was only amused. "You know that I can just order another one, right? That wasn't the only glass in the room."

"Oh please, be my guest." Payson waved her arm toward the bar in a welcoming gesture. "Order another drink. I'll let Kelly handle it and I promise she won't be nearly as nice about it as I was. Ask Austin what happened to him in LA."

Marty snorted. "They monitor your alcohol, Sasha? Are you sure you're the coach at the Rock? Because from what I've seen those two boss you around a lot more than you do them."

Payson leveled a glare at Marty and he choked back his laugh. "Keep talking and we'll start keeping tabs on you, too, Marty."

The French coach winked and said to them, "We men require looking after, don't we Payson? Since neither of your coaches are married, it is lucky that they have such capable young women to take care of them."

Payson decided that she liked him. She let herself get swept into conversation with him until Marcus McGowan came to retrieve her and force her upon some more sponsors. She used to get time with her friends during these receptions, but her new status as the NGO's dream girl meant all work and no play for Payson, so she barely saw Austin, Kelly, or Sasha for the rest of the night.

After half an hour of being stuck in conversation with some arrogant jerk that supported the NGO, Payson wanted to knock her head against the wall, so she was thankful when her phone rang. It gave her the excuse she needed to leave. She pulled her phone out of her clutch, said a quick "excuse me" to the man she was talking to, and practically ran away. She waited until she was around the corner before she answered it. It was her mom.

She answered and said, "Hey mom, what's going on?" Kim knew she was at the reception, so there had to be a reason for the call.

"Payson, sweetie, something's happened." Payson's blood ran cold when she realized her mom was crying. "Your Aunt Maggie just called. Liz was in an accident."

The world went dark around her while her mom went on about car wrecks and drunk drivers and how Liz never felt any pain. The last part was supposed to comforting but it wasn't. She was too numb to say anything back and she wasn't entirely sure she even said goodbye before she hung up. She looked around and realized that she was standing in a hotel hallway and that was far too exposed, so she ran. She ran away from the crowds and away from the truth until she slammed into something hard and couldn't go any farther. She dropped to her knees as a sob ripped through her and did the only thing she could think of—she fumbled with her phone until she managed to dial. When Sasha answered, the only thing she could manage was a strangled cry.

o-O-o

Marty saw a door and rushed toward it. If anyone called him on it, he would absolutely deny that he was hurrying so that he wouldn't get caught. He shot into the room and closed the door behind him.

"Hiding?" a voice asked from behind him. Marty jumped and cried out loud enough to give away his hiding place. Luckily the only person near enough to hear was Sasha, who was leaning against a pool table with a drink in his hand.

"Damnit, Sasha, don't do that! You scared the shit out of me."

"Obviously," Sasha deadpanned.

Marty glared. He and Sasha had an odd friendship that frequently involved being horrible to each other, but the nonchalance that Sasha used to make fun of him bothered Marty more than any scathing remark could. Subtle wasn't Marty's style, so he didn't even try for it. "Are you trying to tell me that you're _not_ hiding? You're just as bad as me."

"Actually, I'm worse," Sasha admitted. "I assume you're hiding from the NGO morons. I'm hiding from Kelly and Payson."

That explained the drink in his hand. The girls were keeping tabs on how much he drank and Marty personally thought they had the right idea. Drinking had always been a problem for Sasha, and it was good that someone was looking out for him—God knew that Marty and Austin only enabled him—but the younger man still needed some ribbing about it. "Those girls really have you by the balls, don't they? Who's the coach up there at the Rock, you or them?"

Sasha took a long draw from his glass and said, "Them. Did you know that Payson is running some of the classes now? And Kelly has done more of my paperwork lately than I have. If you tell anyone this I'll kill you, but Kelly did the mid-year evaluations on the National Team members. I walked into the office one day and she handed them to me completely filled out, and they said _exactly_ what I would have written. I think they're planning a takeover."

Sasha's intent was obviously dry wit, but he was coming off more affectionate than annoyed. Marty called him on it. "Buddy, you're whipped. Think of all those women who tried to tie you down over the years, and now you're being controlled by a couple of teenage girls. How the mighty have fallen."

Marty knew Sasha well enough to know that whatever was about to come out of his mouth would be extremely clever and extremely insulting, but he was saved by the bell. Sasha's phone rang. He chuckled and held it up for Marty to see. It was Payson. "Speak of the devil."

The change in Sasha's demeanor was instant. Whatever Payson said on the phone turned him stone cold serious and he said, "Where are you?"

He headed out the door before she even had time to answer and Marty rushed after him. As soon as Sasha hung up, Marty said, "What the hell was that? What's happening?"

The phone rang again and Sasha answered it. "Kim, what's going on? Payson just called me and she's hysterical." There was a moment of silence while Kim spoke and then, "Don't worry, I'm headed for her now. I'll take care of her."

Sasha hung up and Marty asked again, "What's going on here? What's wrong with Payson?"

He still didn't get an answer because they came to a set of double doors swinging open onto a balcony, and Payson was collapsed on the ground making some of the most tragic sounds Marty had ever heard.

Sasha knelt down beside her. Caught up in her own emotions, she didn't appear to notice him, so he prised her fingers off of the railing and pulled her against his chest. She shifted to cling to him and Marty saw the blood on her knees. She had fallen onto the flagstones and scraped the skin. He had never, in more than five years of knowing Payson, seen her so distraught. It terrified him.

Sasha stroked her hair and brushed kisses across her forehead, murmuring to her under his breath. He looked up only long enough to say, "Marty, I need you to go get Kelly and make excuses for us at the party."

"What kind of excuses?" he asked stupidly.

"There's been a death in the family." Sasha must have seen Marty's panic, because he rushed to add, "Not Mark or Becca. It's her cousin. They were very close."

Payson heard none of this over her sobs, and Marty knew there was nothing he could do to help other than to follow Sasha's directions. He weaved his way back to the party and found Kelly talking with a few members of the NGO and FIG. He approached her and said, "I'm sorry to interrupt, but Payson needs you, Kelly. Apparently there's been a death in her family."

"Who?" Kelly asked, panicked. The Keelers were like family to her, as well.

"A cousin?" Marty replied with a hint of question. He didn't know much about Payson's family outside of her parents and sister, but Sasha seemed to know a lot more. "Sasha said they were really close."

"Oh God, Liz! Where's Payson now?"

"Come on, I'll take you." Marty laid a hand on her shoulder and left the officials confused behind them. He led her back to the balcony where Sasha and Payson were still crouched on the ground, with Payson only mildly calmer. Kelly sat next to them while Marty stood awkwardly nearby. He didn't know what to do or say to help. He had never been good with death.

They didn't stay there for long. As soon as Payson's sobs quieted, Sasha picked her up and carried her back to her room. He laid her on the bed and Kelly curled next to her, and then Sasha and Marty left them alone together.

When the men got back to the room they shared, Sasha dropped onto his bed, covered his face, and muttered what sounded like a few swear words. After thus venting his frustrations, he lowered his hand and said aloud, "I hate leaving her like that."

"Yeah, but she's got Kelly with her. That should help, right?" Sasha didn't respond, so Marty continued, "What happened?"

"I don't think I know much more than you do. Her favorite cousin got hit by a drunk driver and died. That's all Kim said."

"I didn't even know she _had_ a cousin," Marty said, "much less one that she would be so torn up about. I mean, don't get me wrong, it's horrible to lose a family member, but the way she was crying I thought it must have been one of her parents or Becca."

Sasha looked at him bewildered. "You must have met her before. She was at Twin Cities Gymnastics when you recruited Payson. Payson said they barely left each other's sides until she came to the Rock."

When he strained memory, Marty could recall another little girl hanging around Payson in her old gym. A good gymnast, but not enough to draw his full attention. He was there for Payson and Payson only.

Sasha covered his face again and kept talking, more to himself than to Marty, like he needed to speak out loud to fully understand everything. "She was supposed to move to Boulder in June and they were going to get a flat together. I've never seen Payson excited like that. She's always been such an adult, you know? But whenever she talked about Liz coming she was normal teenager for a while. It was good for her. And now it's gone."

"A teenage Payson," Marty mused. "I would have loved to see that. I've known her since she was twelve and never seen her act a day younger than thirty."

Sasha stood up abruptly. "Sorry, mate, but I don't particularly care to talk about this anymore. I'm going to bed."

It was early still, but Marty decided to do the same. There was just too much in the air to be comfortable. It occurred to him that Sasha might be reliving a few tragedies of his own. Marty had never lost anyone like that, but Sasha had lost more than his fair share and that had to be playing through his head.

They were both jolted awake several hours later by someone knocking at their door. Sasha cast an anxious glance at Marty and then bolted for the door. If Payson needed them…

It wasn't Payson. Kelly stood at their door in pajamas and bare feet, shaking like a leaf. Before Sasha could say more than her name, she burst into tears and collapsed against him. For the second time that night, Marty felt like a useless third wheel. He had no idea what to do.

Sasha led her to sit on the side of the bed and held her while she cried, and Marty was horrified to realize that Sasha was crying, too. It was uncomfortable enough to watch a young girl cry, but seeing an adult man cry, especially one as stoic as Sasha, made him feel like an intruder.

He wasn't sure how long they sat together, but eventually Kelly stopped crying and Sasha started talking.

"What's wrong?" he asked.

"I'm being such a stupid little kid," she said, trying to wipe her eyes dry. "I had a nightmare."

"About what?"

"My dad. He died like Liz did and I keep seeing it over and over in my head. It won't go away!" She was crying again, but her words drew a connection in Marty's mind. A dad—that's exactly how Sasha was acting. He was comforting Kelly the way he might comfort a daughter. It threw him into a new light. A year ago Marty would have laughed at the idea of Sasha as a father, but now he could see it.

"I'm such an idiot," Kelly mumbled. "It was ten years ago and I barely even remember it. It's stupid for me to freak out like this."

"It's not stupid, Kelly," Sasha said. "It's normal. I've been playing back my mum's death all night and it's not nearly so relevant. Anytime someone dies unexpectedly like this it brings back memories. There's nothing wrong with that."

She curled her legs up to her chest and rested her head on her knees. "Sometimes I think about what it would have been like if he hadn't died. I don't think he would have let my mom use me like she did. If he was still alive then maybe I… maybe everything would have been different."

"Maybe it would have," Sasha said, "but wishing things were different has never worked for me yet. It's better just to think on the good that you have now."

"I know," she sighed.

He stood and pulled her up with him. "Come on, let's get you back to bed. You need sleep."

He led Kelly through their open door and back into the room across from theirs. For some reason he couldn't explain, Marty followed. He was seeing a new side of both the man and the girl and it fascinated him.

Payson was asleep in one bed and Sasha led Kelly around to the other one. He stood by her side as she climbed in, pulled the covers up over her, and then leaned down to kiss her on the forehead. Kelly mumbled a goodnight and Marty finally turned away.

He got it now. Sasha wasn't letting his gymnasts boss him around like Marty had assumed. He was letting his family take care of him, just like he took care of them. Marty had been jealous of Sasha a lot since they'd known each other, but never, he thought, quite as much as he was right now.


	21. Chapter 21

A/N: Well, it's been forever since I posted on here, hasn't it? That is a little bit because of writer's block, but mainly due to the fact that I have had noooo time to write lately. Real life got busy!

A huge thanks to poppetrussell for beta reading this for me! No matter how many times I proof read, I always seem to miss something, so her second set of eyes is desperately needed!

* * *

><p>"Sasha, this is not what I agreed to," Payson whined.<p>

"Yes it is. It's exactly what you agreed to. It's not my fault that you didn't ask more questions." It was so rare that he pulled one over on Payson and he planned to gloat as much as possible. There was a limit to that, because she would eventually tire of his games and get back at him, but for now he would enjoy his victory.

"You deliberately misled me, Sasha Belov! When you asked me to teach one of Tara's classes tonight you knew I thought you were talking about the level sixes. Not _cheerleaders_." She curled her lips in distaste at the last word. Sasha felt the exact same way, which is why he foisted the class off on her when Tara called in sick. He would teach the level sixes himself and leave Payson to deal with evil in the form of high school girls.

"As I said, it's not my fault you didn't ask more questions. Besides, what on earth would I do trying to coach a group of cheerleaders? I don't even know what that entails."

"Oh, and I do?" she scathed.

It was true that neither of them had the slightest clue what the class would require. He didn't have a firm grasp on exactly what a cheerleader was other than the trampy dancers that sometimes accompanied football teams, but these girls were high school students. "It's lucky you're so bright, then, isn't it?" he said. "You should have no problem figuring it out on the fly. Now if you'll excuse me, I have a class of sixes to teach and you've got an hour to kill."

She was going to hurt him later, he was sure, but it was worth it to see the indignant look on her face as he left the office. He was actually glad to see her get a little feisty. She'd been very down since the Keelers got back from Liz's funeral in Minnesota, and having something else to think about, even if it was an annoyance, was good for her.

She was getting a little bit better every day, but he knew there would be days that were hard for her. Losing someone that she loved would be difficult no matter what, but it was made much worse by the fact that they so many plans together. Liz was supposed to move to Boulder in June, so Payson and Kelly had entertained themselves during their rare free time by looking for apartments to move into. Payson had sent out a few emails asking to be notified when their favorites became available, and each response she got was going to be a sucker punch. He planned to keep her very busy training for the American Classic during June in order to distract her from the fact that Liz would not be coming as planned.

Not long into his level six class, Payson came downstairs and took half the group to the other side of the floor to spot them. He was only mildly surprised to see her. She often helped him teach his classes, but he rather thought that she might be too irritated with him to help tonight. He caught her gaze and smiled; she narrowed her eyes in response. Still irritated, then.

o-O-o

Kelly looked up toward Sasha's office and said, "If he has time to stand there and smirk at us like that, then he has time to teach the class himself."

"This was never about him being too busy. This is about him not wanting to do it." Payson loved Sasha, but right now she was fighting the urge to smack him. She couldn't blame him much, though, because if she could trick someone else into doing this job, she would. She blamed herself for falling for the trick.

Kelly was a life saver. She left after practice since Payson was going to stay late teaching, but as soon as she found out who she was coaching, Payson called and begged her to come back and help. With Kelly there they could at least share a few jokes at the cheerleaders' expense, even if they did have to be unspoken.

The gaggle of parents and little kids filtering out from the level six class started to mix with teenage girls making their way in. Kelly plastered on a fake smile and said, "It's show time. Let's go lead some cheers."

"Yeah, yeah, whatever," Payson grumbled. She led the way to a middle-aged woman who looked to be in charge of the team. "Excuse me, are you Coach Lyman?"

The woman took in their appearance—Kelly's jeans, Broncos t-shirt, and bare feet, and Payson's leo, baggy sweatpants, and messy, sweaty hair. Payson was certain that they came up wanting, but the woman condescended to say, "Yes, I'm Mrs. Lyman. Can I help you?"

Payson ignored the rudeness and the weird correction with her name (Mrs. instead of Coach? What was that about?) "It's nice to meet you Mrs. Lyman. I'm Payson Keeler and this is Kelly Parker. Tara is sick so she asked us to fill in for her with your class tonight."

Mrs. Lyman looked distinctly uncomfortable with the suggestion. "I'm not really… she should have… are you students? I'm sure I've heard your names before."

"We're homeschooled," Kelly said. She was using the full force of her 'I'm talking to a complete idiot' brand of charm. "You've probably just heard our names mentioned on the news at some point. Chanel 9 did a story about us last week, so maybe that's why we sound familiar to you."

A story about their win at the America Cup did run on the news the week before, but the woman was sure to have heard their names before that. There had been dozens of headlines about them in the past six months, not to mention that banners for their various titles were plastered all over the gym. _Of course_ she had heard their names before.

Mrs. Lyman's eye flickered to one of those banners as she realized who she was talking to. Her entire demeanor changed. "Oh! You're the girls that are supposed to go to the Olympics!"

"That's certainly the hope," Payson said, putting on a fake smile to match Kelly's. "The Olympics are still more than a year away, but that is our goal."

The woman was flustered. "Well, I… I would be so glad to have you… It would be an honor for my girls to work with Olympic gymnasts!"

Payson didn't bother to correct her again about the Olympics. They were so trumped up in the media that it was hard to convince people that going to the Olympics wasn't a done deal. Sometimes it was better just to ignore their assumptions.

"Are all of your girls here? I'd like to get started on warm ups."

Mrs. Lyman looked around. "All but one, I think, but go ahead and start. She can catch up when she gets here."

Payson glanced at the clock and frowned. It was two after seven. Class was supposed to begin at seven. "I don't allow tardiness in my classes, Mrs. Lyman. If a girl comes in late, she's going to have to be punished."

"Oh, that's really not necessary. We're very laid back on our team."

"As I said, though, I don't allow tardiness in my classes," Payson repeated. She didn't appreciate the woman trying to dodge the rules. A lot of adults had trouble bowing to the authority of a seventeen year old girl, but she was always firm. "If I'm going to work with these girls then they have to follow my rules, and one of those is that all athletes have to be on time and ready to practice. The girl who is late can either follow through with her punishment or sit out the practice."

Payson walked away then, not waiting for Mrs. Lyman to acquiesce. There wasn't a choice, really. It was do as Payson said or leave the Rock. Beside her, Kelly snickered and murmured, "I love it when you put people in their place like that."

"Glad I could entertain you," Payson whispered back. Then she called out for all of the girls to line up on the floor to stretch. While Kelly led the stretches, Payson walked around the room making form corrections or helping some of the cheerleaders get into a deeper stretch. The routine was making her feel a little more comfortable with the situation. Teaching was normal for her. She'd been helping Sasha with his classes for months, and more recently had started taking over some of Tara's classes full time as the other coach scaled back her work hours to be home with her son. During warm ups, Payson could pretend that this was any other class that she might teach at the Rock.

That illusion was shattered when an overly-assured voice called across the room. "Sorry I'm late. My mani/pedi ran over."

Payson was sure that she must be imagining it. There was no way that Morgan Webster was actually standing in front of her at the Rock. But when she looked around, Payson realized that some of the other girls did look vaguely familiar, and there had been some tittering when she introduced herself that indicated that they recognized her, too. She had assumed it was because they knew her as a celebrity, but maybe they remembered the afternoon that Payson, Kelly, and Heather humiliated Morgan during lunch.

Payson had felt guilty about that day for a long while, but Morgan's cocky air indicated that no permanent damage was done to the girl's self-image. She was just as full of herself as she had always been. Payson's old dislike flamed back to life and she got a small amount of enjoyment out of saying, "A mani/pedi is not an adequate excuse for being late, Morgan. If you show up late then you have to pay the price. The suicide run is right over there. Stretch out and then do five runs."

Morgan's voice caught up to her and she said, "Back-brace girl? Seriously, you're telling me what to do? What are you even _doing_ here?"

"This is my gym," Payson said. Was Morgan so much of an idiot that she missed the gigantic sign on the front of the gym proclaiming Payson as the World Champion, the pictures of her hanging in the lobby, and the banners all across the gym with her name on it? Perhaps she was illiterate. "And I am teaching this class, so you can either run your suicides or leave."

Morgan turned to her coach and whined, "Mrs. Lyman! I don't really have to do what she says, do I? You're in charge, not her."

The woman looked distinctly uncomfortable. Morgan probably had her in her back pocket, but Payson had the same kind of natural authority that Sasha possessed, especially inside of the Rock. She caved and said, "Payson is teaching this class tonight, Morgan. Do the punishment."

Kelly stepped forward and said, "I'll show her what to do, Pay, and you can keep working with the other girls." Payson could sense the evil behind those words, and she was fairly certain that Morgan could, too, but Mrs. Lyman didn't notice a thing. The class might be fun after all.

Payson kept a close eye on Kelly and Morgan to make sure that nobody died. Nobody did, but Morgan came pretty close. Payson told her to do five runs, but Kelly made her repeat any that weren't absolutely perfect, so she ended up doing eight, which was enough to kill high school athletes a lot more serious than Morgan Webster. When they rejoined the group, Kelly stuck near Morgan like a shadow.

The last time Morgan went head to head with Payson and Kelly she was far, _far_ on the losing end, but some people never learn. As soon as Payson got close enough so that they could speak without being overheard, Morgan said, "So I heard you're screwing some old guy."

She must have done some research after their last encounter, because the only place she would have heard the rumors about Payson and Sasha was a gym-gossip forum. She didn't look deep enough to figure out that Sasha was young and hot, though, so Payson made a joke that only she and Kelly would find funny. "Yep, that's right. I'm having a passionate affair with Bela Karolyi."

Kelly snorted and Morgan looked confused. The lack of witty response from the cheerleader prompted Kelly to dive in with an attack of her own. "I heard you've been sleeping with your married tennis coach. Is it true love? How do you think you'll like being a stepmom?"

Payson honestly hadn't believed that rumor until that moment. Morgan's incensed reaction verified everything that Heather had passed on to them. It pissed her off a little bit that the trampy girl could get away with sleeping with a married man with children, who was more than twice her age, but people all over the world were judging Payson and Sasha, two people who were both single and only thirteen years apart in age, because of their supposed relationship. Where was the justice in that?

She gave up any attempt to control Kelly. Morgan deserved everything she got, and Kelly gave her plenty. She pointed out every flaw in Morgan's execution, and when Morgan had difficulty with the choreography, Kelly humiliated her by demonstrating it perfectly after having only seen it twice. On top of this public display, Kelly taunted the other girl with whispered insults and innuendos all through practice. When the class ended, Morgan literally ran out of the gym.

At Mrs. Lyman's request, Payson and Kelly posed for pictures with the rest of the team before they left. Payson had a foreboding feeling that the pictures were going to end up in the newspaper with an article about the cheerleading team working with Olympic-bound gymnasts. She was going to kill Sasha.

When the gym was empty again (the way Payson liked it best) she said to Kelly, "I thought you weren't evil anymore?"

"That wasn't evil. That was justice."

Kelly was so sincere that Payson couldn't help but laugh. The noise drew Sasha down from his office with a smug grin on his face. "You sound like you're having fun," he said. "The class must not have been too bad."

She stopped laughing and planted her hands on her hips. "It was awful and I'm going to make you pay for doing that to us."

"Oh, how's that?" he asked.

She did something that half a year ago she would never have dared. She moved in like she was going to hug him, but rather than wrapping her arms around him, she rested her hands at his hips and pressed her body close to his. She stood on her toes so that she could whisper in his ear, "Believe me, Sasha, I have my ways."

He went slack-jawed. For three months she had followed the rules, teasing him only a small amount which he could easily resist, but if he was going to play dirty then so was she.

"Ew," Kelly said. "Don't do that in front of me."

This made Payson laugh again, and Kelly and Sasha joined in with her. She decided that the day hadn't been so bad after all, because no day could be classified as bad when it ended by her laughing with her best friend and the man she loved.

* * *

><p>AN: I toyed around with skipping this chapter because it wasn't essential, but then when I tried the story didn't flow well. The last chapter and the next chapter needed a bumper between them. Next chapter will be LONG. It is 2,300 words already and there is still a ton to write.


	22. Chapter 22

A/N: I know, I've been gone forever. Life got _really_ busy. Please forgive me *sad puppy dog face*

* * *

><p>"What the hell is <em>she<em> doing here?"

There was a short list of people that Kelly would refer to with such distaste. Her mom was at the top of the list, but there would be a fair bit of panic mixed in if Sheila was in the room. Next on the list would be Tessa Grande, but there was no reason that Kelly would be surprised to see her at a National Team practice, and it was next to impossible for Ivanka or Genghi Cho to be in the Rock, so it had to be…

Payson turned toward the door with dread to verify her suspicions: Ellen Beals was at the Rock.

"I thought you guys were all buddy-buddy," Lauren said to Kelly. "She's always loved you."

"No, she loved my mom. They had a lot in common."

"Like what?" Kaylie asked. She, like the rest of them, was watching Beals like a snake that might strike at any moment.

Kelly named some of the similarities between the two evil women. "They're both psychotic bitches; they both took credit for my success; they both get off on controlling other people. I could keep going, but really the psychotic bitches part covers most of it."

"Let's get back to the original question," Payson said. "What the hell is she doing here?"

Beals made her way over to them, an obvious choice since they were the only four girls in the gym so far. She shouldn't be talking to them without Sasha around, especially considering her history with them, but Sasha was in the equipment room pulling weights for the practice and there was no way to call him back. Beals had never shied away from breaking the unspoken rule that a coach or parent be around when NGO officials spoke with the gymnasts.

She stopped in front of them and took up her usual confrontational stance. "Girls," she said by way of greeting. "You're here very early today."

Lauren, who hated Beals more than any of them, took up the role of spokesperson for their group. "Yeah, we usually are. We like to get in as much practice time we can, which is probably why we won _all_ those individual medals at Worlds. It's funny how that happened since, you know, we didn't deserve to be there, right?"

"Oh, you're talented, sure, but you don't play by the rules, and one of these days that's going to come back to bite you. Really, gate crashing the World Trials? Eating disorders? Running away from home? Sabotaging your teammates by sending out incriminating photos of them—oops, that was supposed to be a secret wasn't it?"

Payson saved Lauren from the distress of having to answer that question. "Actually, Ellen, we already knew about that because, despite your attempts to drive us apart, we're a team. We trust each other and own up to our mistakes, the biggest of which was ever trusting you. How's that ethics investigation going, anyway?"

Beals lost her calm façade. "I have been cleared of all those charges and reinstated in my position in the NGO's supervisory team. That means that I can be here at _every_ team practice to make sure that you are held accountable for the rules that you break."

"I think it's time that _you_ are held accountable for _your_ actions, Mrs. Beals. Like the fact that you knew about and encouraged my anorexia. Or that you threatened my position on the National Team if I participated in the Rock's meet against China."

The whole group turned to look at Kaylie in shock. It was so obvious that Payson wanted to hit herself for not realizing it sooner; Beals had a list of unethical behavior a mile long. They should have filed a complaint against her months ago. Payson was proud of Kaylie for thinking of it and for having the guts to stand up for herself.

"And the NGO might be interested to know that you encouraged me to petition for a place on the team before I was ready," Payson added. "It's not illegal, but it is sleazy."

"It _is_ illegal to deliberately leak confidential information, though," Lauren said. "Like you did with the scholarship that my dad funded for Emily. I'm pretty sure the NGO would want to know about that."

Kelly joined in. "Or that you promised my mom contacts with the NGO's financial backers if we fed you information about the Rock girls. Bribery goes against the Code of Ethics, doesn't it?"

"You'll find that I'm harder to beat than you seem to think. I don't bow to petty threats," Beals said.

"Neither do we," Payson replied. They were playing with fire and knew it, but this woman had screwed with their lives long enough. "Now if you'll excuse us, you interrupted our stretching routine."

The turned their backs to the evil woman and didn't acknowledge her again. They ignored the barbs she traded with Sasha when he came back to the gym, and when Marcus McGowan arrived with the rest of the NGO delegation, the girls informed him that they wanted to file an official complaint against Ellen Beals. They made certain that all of the officials and all of the gymnasts heard them. There was a lot of gossip about it during the morning practice, which Beals was unfortunately allowed to stay for, and it turned out that a few of the other girls had some unpleasant encounters to report. She was finally going to get her due.

They should have known that she would make one final play against them.

It came right before lunch. Sasha called them all together to make an announcement. "First off," he said, "Let's give a round of applause to Beth, Aaricka, Kaylie, Lauren, Kelly, and Payson for dominating at the City of Jesolo Trophy last month." He paused while the group clapped and sent a significant glance toward Beals. Their continued success in the Italy meet only proved again how much they deserved to be on the team. "I hope that we will do just as well the next time we compete in Italy, which I'm happy to say will be much sooner than expected. The Italian National Team has invited Kelly and Payson to come back in June and compete against each of the top two gymnasts from Italy, Russia, China, Romania, Germany, Japan, and Australia."

Payson was stunned. Being singled out for a meet like that was a big deal. The field would be the top eight teams in the world and would contain most of their major All Around competition for the World Championships in the fall. It was a lot like a dry run for Worlds.

Sasha waited until the other girls stopped giving Payson and Kelly hugs and pats on the back and continued, "Of course you all know that we have another meet coming up in a few weeks against Australia and Great Britain, and based on your performances this morning as well as the team practices for the past few months, we have selected the team that will be competing. Andrea, Aaricka, Kaylie, Beth, Kinsley, and Lauren, you will make up our team, and Tessa and Jessica, you will be alternates."

Payson congratulated the girls, especially Kinsley since this would be her first major international competition, but she was really itching to call her mom and tell her about the Italy meet. As soon as Sasha released them for lunch, she dashed to her bag and grabbed her cell phone.

She barely had it unlocked and her contacts pulled up before Ellen Beals snatched the phone out of her hand. "No phones on the floor, Payson," she said. "You should know better than that."

"It's lunch. We're allowed them during lunch."

"But it was _on_ the floor during practice all morning. You shouldn't have had this in your bag." Beals started riffling through the phone, causing Kelly to send Payson a panicked look. Payson gave the barest hint of a head shake to reassure her. She had deleted everything relating to Sasha before practice that morning, knowing that a national practice was a dangerous place to have hints of a relationship between them.

Sasha made his way over. "They all keep their phones in their bags, Ellen. As long as they're turned off there isn't a problem. Give Payson her phone back."

"Oh, what do we have here?" Beals said. Payson's stomach dropped. Did she miss something when she purged her call logs that morning?

Beals pressed a button and laughter came floating out of the speakers, quickly followed by Kelly's voice. "Mom, this is just a little preview of what it's going to be like when you burn in hell!"

_Shit_. They filmed the night at gymnastics camp when they burned Kelly's dresses, but Payson had been so hung over the next day that she forgot about it. She didn't remember most of what happened that night, but even if nothing bad was caught on film, they were still drinking and setting things on fire. This was a disaster.

Sasha grabbed the phone out of the woman's hand and stopped the playback. "That's enough, Ellen. You have no reason to look through Payson's phone."

"_No reason_?" she scathed. "Did you see that video? They were drinking and vandalizing property. That kind of behavior is completely unacceptable for a member of this team."

"I agree," he said, "which is why they were punished both by me and by their parents. The situation has already been handled. The video will obviously be deleted."

Others started to drift over as they realized an argument was going on. The Rock girls were at the forefront, ready to join forces if needed. Beals, of course, was anxious to start the fight. "Don't you think this is a little over your pay grade, Belov? These girls directly violated the NGO's code of ethics, not to mention that they broke the law. Their punishment is up to the board, not to you."

"Pot, meet Kettle," Kelly mumbled.

Beals threw a scathing look at Kelly. "I think it's time that you face the music, girls. Let's see what the other members of the NGO think of your behavior."

She turned on her heel and marched toward the conference room. Sasha laid his hands on Payson and Kelly's shoulders and said, "We should go. Better to get this over with now. Lauren, Kaylie, you should come too."

Once they got out into the foyer and the rest of the National team was left behind, Kelly dropped her bravado. She inched closer to Sasha and whispered, "How bad is it? We're not going to get kicked off the team, are we?"

"No," he whispered back. "You'd hardly be the first National team members who got caught drinking, and they don't want to lose any of you girls. It might be different for some of the others like Anna or Kacey, but they're not going to kick off their four best athletes."

Sasha was confident, and that put Payson much more at ease. She trusted him; he might not go about things in the traditional manner, but he was almost always successful, so she didn't see any reason that he wouldn't be this time.

The other NGO representatives who were at the practice began to file upstairs to the conference room for their usual lunch meeting, so Payson, Kelly, Lauren, Kaylie, and Sasha followed them and took seats at the head of the table.

Most of the officials seemed confused to see the girls there, but Beals didn't waste any time standing up and accusing them. "I've just discovered something very disturbing. These girls have shown many times over that they have no respect for the rules of this sport—they seem to think that they are _above_ the rules—but it seems that their misbehavior has taken a dangerous turn. I confiscated Payson Keeler's phone for having it out on the floor and on it was a video that showed them engaging in reckless, dangerous behavior—drinking, vandalizing property, and setting things on fire. I feel that such blatant violations of National team's code of ethics needs to be addressed immediately. Payson, hand over your phone."

"Don't," Sasha commanded Payson. "It doesn't matter what may or may not be on that phone, because Ellen had no right to rifle through Payson's personal property in the first place. She did have her phone out, but it was after I had dismissed them to lunch so she wasn't breaking any rules by having it. Not to mention, Ellen, that even if she had been breaking a rule, that would only allow you to confiscate her phone, not to search it."

One of the board members who particularly fawned over Payson supported them. "He's right, Ellen. I know we're a gymnastics organization, not the police, but I don't think we're above following the rules that our legal system follows"—nobody missed his jab at Beals by mentioning being 'above' the rules—"and in a courtroom, illegally obtained evidence can't be used."

"I agree," another man said. "Payson doesn't have to hand over her phone, but now that the charge has been made, we do have to investigate it. We can't ignore an accusation of this nature."

Sasha jumped in quickly before anyone else had a chance to say something. "I understand completely, but I would like to express my concern at Ellen Beals being present for the discussion. These girls have already stated an intention to file a complaint against Ellen for unprofessional and unethical behavior toward them. Obviously it is impossible for her to stay nonbiased."

Payson was impressed. Sasha was so balls out and confrontational most of the time that it was surreal to see him act diplomatic. She did have to snicker a bit, though, about his complaint that Beals was biased, since he was depending on the bias of other board members in their favor to get them off the hook.

Many times in the past half-year Payson had imagined slapping Ellen Beals. She would likely never get to live out that fantasy, but the look on the evil woman's face when she was asked to leave came close enough. Sasha was as smug as possible when the NGO complied with his request, but the Rock girls were the only ones in the room who knew him well enough to tell.

Once Beals was gone, he highest ranking official in the room took over the meeting. "Now, Payson, what do you have to say for yourself? Did you do the things that Ellen accused you of?"

She looked at Sasha for direction. Without the video they couldn't prove anything, so she wasn't sure if she was supposed to own up to it. He nodded for her answer the question.

"Yes, sir—at least, part of it. We didn't vandalize anything."

The man, Mr. Daniels, looked to Kelly, Kaylie, and Lauren. "And you three? You were involved in this as well?"

They nodded, but Kelly added in, "Lauren didn't drink."

"Coach Belov, you were aware of this?" Mr. Daniels asked.

"I was, and they were punished accordingly by both their parents and me. The situation has been handled. This took place more than five months ago and there has been no further misbehavior from any of these girls since."

One of the other officials spoke up. He had supported Beals a few times in the past. "Why didn't you report this to us? Ellen is right, this is a serious breach of the code of ethics. Their behavior was dangerous and illegal. As the National Team coach it was your responsibility to report this."

"I'm sorry, but I have to disagree with you there," Sasha said. The smile never dropped off his face. Even Payson, who knew him better than anyone else in the world, wasn't sure if the smile was confident, malicious, or completely fake. "In fact, the NGO's code of ethics explicitly states that the first step in response to misbehavior should be to directly address the person responsible. Only if the problem is unresolved does the code dictate involving the Board. As I stated before, the situation has been handled."

In the half hour that followed, Payson started to wonder if Sasha had been hanging out with Steve Tanner in secret. He was brilliant, coming off more like a lawyer than a gymnastics coach, and with the support of some of the more important board members who didn't want to lose the Rock girls, Sasha almost had them argued out of trouble. Almost.

Beals didn't succeed in getting them kicked off the team, her obvious goal, but she had made a big enough scene to make some of the NGO feel like the girls had to be punished. Payson, Kelly, Lauren, and Kaylie had a lot of influence on the team, and nobody wanted the other team members to imitate their bad behavior. At the very least the other girls knew that they had been drinking, and Ellen had probably used the time since her exile from the meeting to spread rumors that they had burned down a house or something. The NGO had to at least _appear_ to punish them.

Before they went downstairs to begin the ridiculous conditioning circuit that they had been sentenced with, Marcus asked the girls to testify for their complaint against Ellen Beals. They all told their stories, Lauren and Kaylie's more incriminating than Payson's, but Kelly's accusations topped them all. Beals was rarely subtle with her sliminess, but it turned out that she was downright open about it when dealing with people whose morals matched her own. She had bribed Sheila for support and ill-gained information, and had blackmailed Kelly into sabotaging Kaylie, Lauren, and Emily by threatening her place on the team. It was no wonder that Kelly had been so horrible when she was being pushed by both her mother and Beals; she never had a choice.

Kelly, Payson, Kaylie, and Lauren started their workout while the rest of the team continued their normal training, but they kept an eye on the other girls filing out one at a time to speak against Beals. Nearly every girl had something to report, and Ellen's face got darker each time a new girl was called away. She had been confined to the office while the interviews were going on, but they could feel her presence like a storm cloud in the gym. Finally, when they were near the end of practice, she was escorted out of the gym by two other board members and Marcus McGowan came to speak to the team.

"The official investigation into your complaints against Ms. Beals will take a few weeks," he told them, "but I want you all to know that, in light of the information that all of you girls came forward with today, she will not be returning to any National Team practices. She has been instructed not to make contact with any of you. If she does, please inform me immediately. I assure you, we are taking these complaints very seriously and making every effort to control the situation."

There was no small amount of celebration. For some reason Payson had always assumed that Beals targeted the Rock girls in particular, and though she certainly hated them the most of the team, her machinations extended a lot further than Payson ever dreamed. She'd made life miserable for a lot of people during her quest for power, but finally, _finally_, they were free from her.

o-O-o

The gym was blissfully quiet after the long, stressful practice. The day had ended well—he always enjoyed watching Ellen Beals get one-upped—but having her around was like standing next to a ticking bomb. He'd been on edge all day and hadn't relaxed until all the NGO suits were gone and Payson and Kelly were the only two left in the gym.

He couldn't believe they could walk after the afternoon they had, much less tumble, but Payson was crazy and Kelly scarcely less so. Neither wanted to leave without having at least worked through their floor routines once.

He didn't watch them, but he kept track of the pounding on the floor as first Payson and then Kelly's music played over the sound system. When they finished, he heard one set of footsteps head to the locker room and the other toward his office; he didn't even need to look up to know that it would be Payson standing in his doorway.

"I need my phone back," she told him.

He'd kept her phone during the second half of practice to ensure that nobody tried to be mischievous and sneak a look at the video Beals found. Most of the girls on the team were trustworthy, but there were a few who would sabotage their teammates if they had a chance, and he didn't want to give them an opportunity. That hadn't been his _only_ reason for keeping her phone, though.

"Oh, no," he said, pulling the phone out of his pocket. "You don't get this back yet. We have to deal with the issue of this video."

"What's to deal with? It's not that hard to delete something on an iPhone, Sasha. All you do is push the little trashcan icon."

He smiled, partly in response to her sarcasm, and partly in anticipation of what was to come. "Of course, but before we delete this, I really feel that I need to watch it."

"_No_," she insisted. "You are not watching that, Sasha. I was drunk and acting like an idiot."

He grinned even wider. "Exactly."

She lunged for the phone, but he managed to pull her in his lap and trap her arms so that she couldn't reach it. She struggled against him, but he refused to let go and eventually she gave up and sank against him. It was rare that they were able to sit like that, so she wouldn't keep fighting it.

He pulled up the video on her phone and mentioned, "You should probably set a password on here."

"I know." She sighed and leaned her head against his shoulder. "I just hate being that person."

"What person?"

"You know, the drama girl. The one who thinks her life is _so_ important and it's the end of the world if someone looks on her phone."

"Not to be a pessimist, but it almost was the end of the world when someone looked on your phone today, or at least the end of _your_ world," he pointed out. "You could have been thrown off the team."

"Fine." She pouted as she pulled up her settings and typed in 1211 as a new password.

"One-two-one-one?" he asked. "Why?"

She shook her head. "Not one-two-one-one. Twelve-eleven, like a date. December eleventh."

It took a few seconds for the meaning to sink in. December eleventh was they date of the WOGA meet, the night that they stood on their balconies and admitted their feelings for the first time. "It's perfect. But no more stalling. I'm watching this video."

She groaned and hid her face against his shoulder. "I don't want to see it. From what little I remember of that night, I'm sure it's embarrassing."

"I'm sure it is, but talking to you while you were drunk was one of the most entertaining things I've ever experienced, so I'm not missing this opportunity."

He pressed play and watched the girls' drunk antics. It was a miracle they hadn't killed themselves messing with fire when they could barely stand, but along with the concerning moments were some seriously entertaining ones. They recorded for a long time and captured not only Kelly burning dresses and screaming profanity at her mother, but also Kaylie telling a lot of jokes that made no sense, a long rant from Payson which Sasha recognized to be about the limitations of her relationship with him, but which Kaylie and Lauren probably assumed to be about Max, and the entire group doing a full rendition of the Spice Girls "Wannabe." Sasha laughed so hard that he nearly unseated Payson from his lap.

He was reluctant to let her go when it was over, but she needed to get home and he had work to do. It was good that she left, though, because she wasn't gone for long before Summer showed up, and it would have been impossible to explain away Payson sitting in his lap if Summer had caught them.

"What are you doing here?" he asked.

She shuffled over to the desk and grabbed a stack of papers. "I was going to do some work on the budget this weekend," she said, "but I accidentally left the information about this month's dues up here. I just came to get it."

"Oh," he said stupidly. It seemed strange to him that she waited until late in the evening to pick up the papers rather than coming during the training day, but he had never understood the way Summer's brain worked. He tried to think of something to say that wouldn't be awkward. "Well, I'm sure Kim appreciates you doing this. She's got a lot on her plate right now with Payson and Kelly both traveling so much for endorsements and competitions, so it's good that she's got you to help out."

"I'm happy to do it." Summer seemed to waver between leaving and staying for a minute, until finally she sat her papers back down and said, "Sasha, would you like to go to dinner with me?"

Damnit. He'd been afraid this would happen. He thought he'd sent the message that he wasn't interested, but Summer Van Horne never did take hints well. "Summer… I don't think that's a good idea."

"Look, I know things didn't end well between us, and that was partly my fault"—_Partly_ her fault? He'd made a lot of mistakes with Summer, but that was more by beginning the relationship in the first place. The way they ended their relationship was _completely_ her fault.—"but we were really good together. I think it's worth giving that another chance."

Since she didn't accept his gentle rejection, he was going to have to be more explicit. "We weren't good together, Summer. We weren't even real together. There was someone else." He tried to think of a way to explain without letting on that he was talking about Payson. It would take a bit of lying. "She was… already in a relationship, so I tried to distract myself from her. I thought that if I was with you, I might be able to forget her. It was a horrible reason to ask someone out, and I'm sorry I did that to you, but there is nothing to go back to for you and I. It was never real."

He felt like a complete arse admitting that, but that was appropriate because he had acted like a complete arse during that entire situation. It took a long time for him to admit to himself what he'd done. He'd been so far in denial about his feelings for Payson back then that he hadn't even recognized his actions for what they were.

Summer sank down into a chair. She appeared to be in some denial of her own. "But you said you loved me," she whispered.

Sasha couldn't look her in the eye as he answered. "I said it to her. You just happened to be the person standing in front of me."

"But… but what about the book?"

His curiosity overcame his shame and he looked at her. "What book?"

"The book about Christianity. If it wasn't real then why were you trying to change for me?"

He didn't realize she'd seen that book. It had nothing to do with her, but he could understand why she would think that it did. "I… I didn't. I was talking to her one day and she said that she believed. It surprised me, so I bought that book to try to understand. I'm sorry, Summer, but it was never about you."

Summer started crying, which made Sasha feel like crap, but then she spat out, "You're a selfish man, Sasha Belov," and ran from the room. With that his compassion went out the window and all he felt was frustration. He didn't try to pretend that his actions had been mature or well thought out, but hers had been no better. She hadn't even bothered to break up with him; she just started dating Steve Tanner again because she was angry that Sasha _hadn't_ taken advantage of her. The more he thought about it, the crazier Summer seemed, and he was more thankful than ever that the relationship was long, _long_ over.

o-O-o

Lauren couldn't help but roll her eyes when she saw Kelly and Payson's cars still in the Rock parking lot. They had been tortured all day long, but still those two stayed late. They were both nuts. Kelly tried to pretend like she wasn't a crazy as Payson, but she totally was. She just didn't want to admit that she was as obsessed as her best friend was.

The gym was empty when Lauren went in, so the other girls must have already moved to the locker room. She headed that way; she was hoping that her new bracelet was still in her locker, because otherwise it was lost and her dad was going to go postal when he found out. He was mad enough when he saw the credit card bill for it. If she lost it, he would kill her.

She was halfway across the gym before she realized that people were talking. She stopped to listen out of bad habit and heard Payson's voice say, "I don't want to see it. From what little I remember of that night, I'm sure it's embarrassing."

Sasha chuckled and said, "I'm sure it is, but talking to you while you were drunk was one of the most entertaining things I've ever experienced, so I'm not missing this opportunity."

Lauren's brain shot into overdrive. When had Sasha talked to Payson when she was drunk? As far as Lauren knew, Payson had only ever been drunk the one time, and Sasha hadn't been anywhere around. She hadn't talked to anyone that night except the other girls. Oh, and that ridiculous hours-long phone call with Max on the way home, so when would Sasha have ever talked to her drunk… _Unless Payson hadn't been talking to Max. _What if she was talking to Sasha that whole time?

Her curiosity took control of her legs and she moved forward until she could look up into the office. Payson and Sasha were there, like she expected them to be, but she definitely did not expect their relative positions. Payson was sitting in Sasha's lap and leaning her head against his neck so that they were skin to skin.

She couldn't believe it. She _literally_ couldn't believe it. She had to be imagining it, because there was no way that Payson freaking Keeler was cuddling with Sasha Belov. She almost had herself convinced that she was hallucinating until Kelly came out of the locker room, saw Lauren, looked up into the office, and froze in complete and utter terror.

When Kelly broke out of her shock she rushed over to Lauren and dragged her into the locker room. As soon as the door slammed behind them she swore, "That was not what you think it was!"

"So I wasn't hallucinating?"

The question threw Kelly, and she stuttered for a few seconds before she said, "Uh, no, you were not hallucinating, but Sasha and Payson are not having an affair, either. I know that looked bad, but it was really nothing."

It did look bad. It looked really, _really_ bad, and a few months ago she would have leapt to the worst conclusion, but Lauren had been working hard to trust her friends more, so she tried to give Payson the benefit of the doubt. She asked, "Okay, then what's going on? I heard Sasha say that he was the one Payson talked to the night we went out to gymnastics camp, and I remember that night pretty well. They talked for two hours. _Two _hours, and then the way they were just sitting? If that's not an affair, then what exactly is it?"

Kelly sighed and dropped down onto a bench. She looked completely defeated. "They're… they're in love. And yeah, I get how wrong that is, but I'm around them all the time and, Lo, they're perfect for each other. I didn't really even believe in love until I saw how they were together, so you can't tell on them. They're not even breaking any rules, really. All they do is talk, but you know the NGO wouldn't understand."

Lauren hadn't exactly been blind to Payson and Sasha's behavior. She saw how they always acted like a couple, like the time at her special photo shoot when he accidentally made the photographer think that Payson was his girlfriend. She had noticed it and fought hard to bite her tongue, occasionally letting an innuendo slip through, but over all behaving herself pretty well since she started therapy. She had always figured that Payson and Sasha didn't realize how they came off, and it was all pretty innocent stuff anyway, but deep down Lauren had probably always known the truth. Did saying it out loud now really change anything?

Back when she sent that video to Beals, Lauren thought that Sasha was giving Payson special attention because he liked her better than the rest of them. Sasha even admitted that he _had_ paid more attention to Payson than he had to the rest of them, but he apologized and promised that he wouldn't let it happen again. He hadn't, either, so Lauren really didn't have any reason to be jealous this time. He'd been a great coach and his plan to make her a dual specialist was almost certain to get her on the Olympic team. It actually made her feel kind of honored, that he would help her to win on beam even though her main competition was the woman he loved.

"Lo?" Kelly asked tentatively. "Why aren't you saying anything?"

She shook herself out of her daze. "Sorry, just… processing, I guess." She sat down beside Kelly. There were still things she needed to understand. "How long has this been going on?"

Kelly was hesitant, but she answered anyway. "They were already way far into it by the time I came here. I've asked them both a lot of questions, and as far as I can tell they've loved each other from almost the moment Sasha walked into the Rock, but neither of them realized it until a few months ago. When we were in Dallas in December they basically promised to wait for each other until after the Olympics."

Wow, that was intense; the Olympics were still more than a year away. "And they are _waiting_? I mean, not like Emily and Damon?"

"Like I said before, all they do is talk. Granted, they talk _all the freaking time_, but… What you just saw was the most physical they ever get."

"And who knows about this?" Lauren asked.

Kelly fidgeted on the bench beside her. "A lot more than I'm comfortable knowing about it; the more people know, the more likely it is that someone will accidentally let something slip. All the Keelers known, me, you, and Kaylie figured it out on New Year's Eve after that kiss debacle with Austin."

That whole kiss situation suddenly made so much sense. Lauren always thought Payson way over reacted to it, but if she thought it was Sasha that would explain why she kissed him back so passionately and why she was so angry afterward. Lauren totally should have caught that back when it happened. She pushed it from her mind and said, "You're right, it _is_ more likely for something to slip with so many people knowing, but it also means that there are more people to defend them if they do get caught."

"So you're going to keep the secret?" Kelly asked, her eyes pleading.

Lauren feigned indifference. "Well, if I told someone then Sasha would probably get fired again, and he is the best coach in the world, so I kind of need him around." Even though she was still reeling from the truth, she had learned her lesson the hard way. Snitching on people only caused trouble, and if Kelly was telling the truth then they really weren't doing anything wrong.

She would have to tell Payson she knew, because her shrink kept harping about how she needed to be honest with her friends, but all things considered she would rather be in on the secret than not. Plus, this opened up a whole new realm of possibilities for ways to tease her friend and coach.

* * *

><p>AN: Thanks to poppetrussell for betaing. I will also soon be going through to make round 212 of upgrades for all the typos in the chapters I did not have beta'd.


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